If I have a problem where I sometimes "cut people off" when in a conversation with them or interupt them without allowing them to finish their statement, what "exercises" or other "practices" can I do to prevent or limit myself from doing such?
I'm not talking about conversations where we would cut someone off because they were being rude, but rather conversations where we'd be just talking about cars or trees or something...you know~ your average "worldly" type of conversation, is what I'm talking about.
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2006-08-31 08:04:02 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I think I like the answer that says I should look at a a glass of water or something.... I bet I could use whiskey, and everytime I think I am going to cut someone off, I could take a sip.....
2006-08-31 08:29:02 · update #1
Thanks for all the answers, there were many good ones and ideas. Each case is different. I think there are some times I think I am or I am "rushed" and there fore I have to "pack more lines in" other times well... I am just trying to get to more root issues maybe... I mean concerning the BOTTOM LINE.
VEGAN LOVE
2006-09-01 03:17:14 · update #2
And yes I know that sometimes these people need to just TALK things out and that is how they will wake up to BE VEGAN. Other times well I guess that I just don't know....and I fade away into the underground.
What is better to burn out?
Again thanks for the answers.
2006-09-01 03:19:09 · update #3
Sometimes I do the same thing, I don't think I am more important, I feel like I am going to forget what to say next. I am trying to work on it. I just really try to think about not cutting someone off, and try to just listen until a silence, it is hard. At least we admit it, the people that don't admit it are the ones that think they are more important.
2006-08-31 08:18:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just think about it. Constantly remind yourself that you can't or you shouldn't interrupt them. By constantly having this thought in your mind, you will get used to it and you will be able to stop yourself.
Another idea would be to choose an object that reminds you of your goal. Here's what you should do. If you are at a party and you're at the table with some friends and you know you're going to start a conversation, take your glass or bottle or an object that you happen to have and put it in front of you on the table or somewhere where you can see it clearly. Think of this object as your purpose. So when the conversation starts and you will get yourself lost in it and feel tempted to say something you will see the glass/bottle in front of you and you'll remember.
That's what I do when I need to remind myself things. If I'm discussing something with a friend who's been through a certain experience (just to give an example) and I want to keep from mentioning that experience, I look around the place and I spot something: a bus, a waiter, a dog. Anything. And I choose that person or object or place as my reminder. Whenever I want to say something, I see the reminder and stop myself. But choose a 'reminder' that you can't help but see, something that is obvious, something that is always in your visual area so you can't avoid seeing it.
Good luck.
2006-08-31 15:14:59 · answer #2 · answered by Cheshire Riddle 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pay more attention to what the other person is saying & that should help you to curtail your eagerness to tell your story.
I have an aunt who does this to everyone all the time. I have to be honest we really dislike talking to her for that reason. She'll ask us a question & before we have a chance to answer she's already onto someone else or something else.
It's very annoying. Why ask a question if you really don't care to hear the answer? Maybe when you solve that problem you'll have a better chance in being able to wait your turn when in a conversation with others.
2006-08-31 15:59:43 · answer #3 · answered by paintressa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a friend like that and I had to tell her to stop doing that! I would be telling her something really important that meant a lot to me and she would interrupt right in the middle of what I was saying without any warning and talk to someone else or do some other distracting thing and it would really deflate me! I would no longer be interested in finishing what I was saying that she just interrupted me about because it didn't mean all that much when you told it a second time!
Sometimes I just felt like crying in frustration because it happened so much and she was the only friend that did it! None of my other friends did.
It is a real problem and you will just have to work at it like my friend is doing. I had to tell her several times that she not only did it to me but to others. She is much more conscious of this and is doing so much better in letting people finish what they have to say before she responds.
Like I said earlier, you just have to consciously work at it. It's a learned habit that has to be unlearned.
2006-08-31 15:25:39 · answer #4 · answered by December Princess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
PRACTICE conversationalizing when you are alone or with a buddy. Pretend to visualize that you are hypnotized and cannot interrupt. Practice that. Wear a rubber band on your wrist and snap it when you start to interrupt. Take notes! Let the other person talk and take mental* notes (or written notes) and mail them your comments that would interrupt them if they have to leave before you can reply.
*You may have to study memorization techniques from a book or a course before you perfect this enough.
P. S.: If something is an emergency and you must interrupt, yell real fast " Watch out you're gonna be hgit by a car!!!!"
2006-08-31 15:30:42 · answer #5 · answered by pilgrimofspace 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason you cut people off in mid-sentence is because you aren't really listening to them, and because you think that what you have to say is more important than what they have to say. You hear them speak, but only so much as it allows you to think of something you want to say. For example: "We were by this tree, when the lightning struck, and it scared us have to death, but" You interrupt, "I knew a guy that was hit by lightning once..."
The only exercise for this is to start listening to them, and refrain from saying anything until asked to speak. The people that are usually viewed as the most intelligent people in life, are those people who listen the best/most. God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason.
2006-08-31 15:23:10 · answer #6 · answered by eric l 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop thinking that what you have to say is more important than what the other person has to say. The best way to break that habit is to actually LISTEN to what the other person is saying. If you are doing this, you won't be able to cut them off.
2006-08-31 15:08:50 · answer #7 · answered by Spirit Walker 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
In conversation, ask ppl open ended questions -- and plan on summing up what they say to show you actually heard them -- if you can do that(?). It doesn't sound like you care about others when you talk over them.
2006-08-31 15:22:20 · answer #8 · answered by Ann 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know....but my Grandma is like that and it drive me batty! Maybe you can just try to wait until a silent moment to talk...or if you cut someone off apologize and hold your tongue!
Sorry, my answer was kind of lame...good luck though!
2006-08-31 15:09:25 · answer #9 · answered by Scoot 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cutting someone off is rude. People want you to listen to them, they love it. Try it and see.
2006-08-31 21:07:59 · answer #10 · answered by dancinintherain 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋