Okay so I am 19 years old and my boyfriend is 21 and we have been together for 5 years and lived together for 2, and every time I talk about marrage he gets really mad and I told him that I wanna wait until I am 21 to get married, I just wanna get engaged how much longer will I have to wait? Any ideas on how to make him change his mind?
2006-08-31 07:51:43 · 15 answers · asked by Courtney 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm not sure if you can change his mind! Talk to him about it he might just be scared of taking on so much responsibilities so fast. B/c he would have to be responsible for you and any children you might have in the future! Good,luck though! Don't be in a big hurry to get married enjoy being a teen and going out and stuff!
2006-08-31 07:56:02 · answer #1 · answered by Mallory 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Courtney, you can't force feelings. I'm sorry to be so blunt, but it's a fact of life. He will have to reach the engagement decision on his own. No amount of lobbying or campaigning will do it -- besides, would you really want to be with someone who needs to be convinced of your desirability as a wife? Or someone who, every time you talk about marriage, gets "really mad"? Uh-oh; look out. Alarms going off. Hear 'em?
Could it also be that he's aware that you "just wanna get engaged" (your words) and perhaps finds that attitude off-putting?
2006-08-31 08:07:27 · answer #2 · answered by macguffin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change his mind; you're both young, and it's natural he doesn't want to "settle down" quite yet. He's being honest with you, appreciate that. You may or may not be with the same guy when you're 21 - just wait and have fun!
2006-08-31 10:24:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Trust me, You don't want him to change his mind. If he feels pressured into marrying you, then it will be for the wrong reason. Don't give ultimatums. Don't make threats. The best way to handle your situation is to sit down and have a talk with him. Express your desires, wants, and needs. Then, make a plan to change things in the event he will not commit. ie: move, go to college, join a community club. Do what you need to do to better yourself with or without him.
2006-08-31 07:57:18 · answer #4 · answered by Danette G 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
u r too yopung. i think he is right to wait. i am not saying anything to hurt u. the truth is both of u r young and what differnce does is make if u r engaged or not both of u r commited to each other and r living together, maybe he just wants to make it special so dont rush him. when the time is right it will be wonderful. if he does it now u will always wonder if he did it to make u happy or becasue he wanted too
2006-08-31 07:57:07 · answer #5 · answered by in ur face 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hon u need to slow down. U r 19 and living home for 2 yrs????? where re u parents. Trying educating urself first b4 thinking abt marriage.
2006-08-31 08:07:30 · answer #6 · answered by Miss-Kenya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be patient and wait, hun you're only 19. Fact of the matter is that it's unlikely that you will marry this man.
2006-08-31 08:02:50 · answer #7 · answered by Kiara 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like he has dug his heels in..
What he has now is the best of marriage (living together) without the legal paperwork and hassel it can cause.. What exactly is the incentive for him to consider marriage???
There is an old addage "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"
2006-08-31 07:57:39 · answer #8 · answered by Diane (PFLAG) 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Geez, you may want to really think about it, you are REALLY young. You plan on being with this man when you are in your 80's? I mean don't you want a little time to explore, go out and have fun? Your not even old enough to drink in most states.
2006-08-31 07:54:55 · answer #9 · answered by metalicgirl69 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know he'll be mad but in a serious relationship like this you need to really bring it to attention. If you are concerned you'll never be married don't be completely upset if he says he'll never marry you.
2006-08-31 08:22:03 · answer #10 · answered by K.I.S.S. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋