My partner...god bless, can be very testing and unreasonable. I have very good patence, i can stay calm for a long time and bite my lip even when he is quite frankly being and ********! He is very sensitive (to himself not others) so getting angry will make him worse or just go completly silent and passive agressive. I need a visualisation tequnique or something to keep me centured and calm when we have a dispute, i need to stay focused and CALM when he is being unreasonable..........when i get upset i take it inside and carry it arond for days, so a tecnique that stops me from taking it all personally would be great..................
any ideas?
2006-08-31 03:30:49 · 15 answers · asked by idelves 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Yes, just tell him..."look, when we both calm down, we'll talk about this. How about after dinner tonight?"....then tell him, "I need to take a walk/drive" and LEAVE....walk out of the door! He can't argue with himself. If you do this everytime he starts getting loud and "unreasonable", he'll get the message that he'll be alone in his anger. Godloveya.
2006-08-31 03:37:01 · answer #1 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is my honest answer. Go off on him. Give him what he is giving you.
I am formerly much like your partner. I was very sensitive and would just go on a rampage every now and then. My partner was always very calm, very understanding. And then one day, he had it. He unleashed the devil on me. I didn't appreciate it at the time and went CRAZY. But later....I realized this is EXACTLY what I had been doing to him. I changed my ways, not completely, you can't change your spots, but I recognize it most of the time and stop it where it starts.
If this doesn't work, then you will either need to leave b/c this situation seems to be very detrimental to your mental (and then corresponding, your physical) health......OR, find an outlet, be it creative or physical that will let you vent.
Good luck.....
2006-08-31 03:42:40 · answer #2 · answered by Genevieve 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest that when he starts acting like that you take on the mode of a parent with a rebelious child. Don't get upset and don't raise your voice, don't say anything at all, just be there in body and in mind, go to your favorite spot where you can relax.... imagine wind, soft and gentle blowing on your face and getting rid of all the anger and the dissapointment and the stress. After he is done and he has calmed down, I suggest you get out of the house and go for a walk and clear your head and just let everything go.......... I hope this helps......... blessed be.
2006-08-31 03:37:51 · answer #3 · answered by shy&gental 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get away from the situation for a while. I like to go for a long walk alone, or get in my car to drive and get some coffee or a bite to eat. A glass of wine is always nice. Just get out of the house and take a deep breath and try to think about something or someone that gives you Happy memories.
2006-08-31 03:56:42 · answer #4 · answered by Bazinga 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For guys we do aggressive sports. It's proven that suicidal rates are higher among women part of the reason is that we do these sports as a way to control or let things out. U could try. Play soccer or buy a punchbag, once u sweat and tire urself, u wldnt wanna bother about his petty behavior. Dont take it personally, its not ur fault at all. When the tension is high, just take a walk to calm urself.
2006-08-31 03:41:15 · answer #5 · answered by Libra 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Take a walk or just get away fro a while to clear your head of the problems and sort them thru.... try writing and stuff then let him read it it will help him see where you are coming from
2006-08-31 03:37:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tequila
2006-08-31 03:32:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think keepimg is inside you are harming yourself not anyone else if hes ahuman being he cant control why do you.. with the passage of time by doing this you will feel so depressed with nothing but your life so just you need to burst out your anger if not always but sometimes that will stop him from taking your advantage......
2006-08-31 03:38:22 · answer #8 · answered by sara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
someone told me that exercise is a good stress reliever. If you get upset, maybe go for a run. i think it's a good way to get your mind off of things so that you don't carry it around for days.
2006-08-31 03:35:43 · answer #9 · answered by C_Ras 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
whatever he does, being an ********, that is nothing to do with you, and you should not take all that shits from him, i think he wants out but dont have the gut to tell you, you shall stand up for yourself and tell him you do not want to take the **** from him otherwise he wont not respect you.Remember, you teach people how to treat you!
2006-08-31 03:40:36 · answer #10 · answered by ubon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋