I have been miserable for years and am now working on a divorce. I have had a friend (only a friend) for 10 years. Nothing has ever happened between us. Now I hear his marriage has been on the rocks for a couple years. We have talked alot over the summer and I am developing strong feelings for him. Through our conversations I know he won't be leaving his wife for another year (he wants his kid to finish college first). Do I tell him how I am starting to feel for him or wait until he really files for divorce and then let him know. I don't want to lose his friendship but it will be hard only being friends since I am developing feelings for him.
2006-08-31 03:07:43 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He probably feels the same way.
2006-08-31 03:10:07 · answer #1 · answered by dandelionsoup 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my gosh. He is married. Do people really not know what marriage is. It is a commitment. You don't fall in love with married people. I don't care if his marriage is hell. He is married. Leave the man alone and be alone for a few months or maybe years. Just because you don't see any problem with the married man trust me if he was your husband it wouldn't take long before you would find the same problems your ex has with your new man.
Stay away from men. Friendship or not he is not your husband. He choose his wife for some wonderful reason. Let him stay married. I don't care what he has told you. Everyone likes to point fingers. Of course he is going to tell you bad things about his wife. But if you have been his friend for 10 years you know his wife. So she techancially is your friend to.
2006-08-31 10:15:02 · answer #2 · answered by Bears#1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to keep your feelings to yourself right now. If a relationship between you is meant to be, it'll happen when you're both ready. You yourself are just working on your divorce and I think you also need some time. It's too soon for you to jump into anything.
You'll feel much better if a relationship develops in the future if you wait now until the time is right.
2006-08-31 10:12:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say to wait a bit until you are both free and available.. obviously if his marriage is rocky.. it's not the good time to start a new relationship... be there as his friend for now... when he divorces.. if he does.. and if you feel the same way.. then you let him know.. for now.. I would just be a friend for him...
2006-08-31 10:15:30 · answer #4 · answered by Lyne B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would wait till you both are free. Don't jump right into another serious relationship that fast. Enjoy being single, by all means you can see the other person I am just saying don't rush the relationship.
Best of Luck!!
2006-08-31 10:13:27 · answer #5 · answered by Lady Dee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
for the time being wait, bc you do not want to be accused as the fault of his marriage. If your feelings are really strong they will hold till he is divorced.
2006-08-31 10:36:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be really careful. You might be having feelings for him right now because you are going through a divorce and he is helping you get through it. I would wait before I mentioned it. I would make sure that I really had real feelings for him because of him, and not because he was my comfort when I needed that.
Go slow...
2006-08-31 10:11:36 · answer #7 · answered by cinson1999 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you do not want to be the cause of his marriage break up, he is married, and until he is going through the divorce, then you can tell him
2006-08-31 10:11:33 · answer #8 · answered by Right Wing Extremist 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Both of your marriages are a sham at this point. If you fool around with him realize that he may end up staying married. Actions speak louder than words. His kid is grown- whose he fooling?
2006-08-31 10:21:44 · answer #9 · answered by John E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Until you are both divorced, let it at just friends.
2006-08-31 10:27:39 · answer #10 · answered by doglady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋