I was married 28 years, raised 3 sons, my husband didn't want me to work, so I have no work experience & can't get a job. I have no car & live out in the country so I have no way to get to work if I could get a job. I'm engaged to a man who totally controls me & keeps me away from my family. I'm more dependant on him than when I was married, at least I had a car after the divorce, till I rolled it 3 times on the way to my fiancee's house a year ago. I told him to let me off the phone so I could drive-he heard the wreck! He has money, I'm wearing a 2ct diamond ring. If I break off the engagement I give up having plenty of money, a Mercedes convertable to drive, big house w/pool, & I won't have to work, but I can't see my children or the rest of my family & can't go anywhere w/o his consent, even to WalMart! He escorts me everywhere! If I break off the engagement I will have my freedom, but how will I live w/no car & no job. I thought I loved him, but didn't know him yet. What do I do?
2006-08-30 21:18:11 · 10 answers · asked by ICUsmile 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You have a job, the oldest one!
2006-08-30 21:22:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anarchy99 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
In reality you are using this guy you are with. I say use him for everything you can get. He is the controling type and deserves everything he gets. Suck up to him and maybe he will buy you a car. Then as soon as the car is in your name and you get a tank of gas leave and go stay with your family. Do the best you can . Life just dealt you a hard blow. Find yourself a good man and you will find that job. Take a few courses. Go to a college and ask for financial help.
2006-08-30 21:39:46 · answer #2 · answered by Busy Lady 2010 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u ar a smart woman ull get married to him and then kill him so that u can have the money and the freedom. ;) just joking. your freedom is more imortant than money. so break it off . im sure those around you will help you set up something small. if you are a good cook start a small eatery or bakery. If you dont have property then do a delivery service and work out of home. If you are good at craft then make small nick nacks and deliver them to nearby shops to sell. There are a lot of options.
If you take this man as ur husband ull spend the rest of ur life crying. wat good is money when you dont have peace or the wish and will to live?
2006-08-30 21:46:29 · answer #3 · answered by agonychick 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What do you want most? If he is like this and you are not married, It will get worse after you are married. You are going to have to choose between your family and him. Money is not everything. It can make your life easier but not happier. Your best bet is to leave him and take some classes. I go to college with people older that you, so it is never to late to learn some thing new. Ask your family for help if you must.
2006-08-30 21:24:35 · answer #4 · answered by mommynokissies 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all.. you have experience.. You know how to take care of kids, clean, answer phones and take messages and more.. Dont limit yourself.. Grant it.. its hard getting out there and starting over..but dont limit yourself. Your at the bottom already emotionally.. so, just stand up. Dont load yourself with what if problems. but look forward to being a new person and getting to know the individual you have lost. You have put both mens needs before yours. I would never give up family or my children for any man.. not even the one that helped me make them.
2006-08-30 21:29:42 · answer #5 · answered by DearAbby 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Quit being dependent on men & start making your own decisions & money. Get a job, get a car, get an apt, go back to school - Do whatever it takes but get out of the "dependancy" role. It is only trapping you fromn who you could be.
2006-08-30 23:15:23 · answer #6 · answered by george g 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
how will you LIVE if you dont leave this relationship ?? what you are discribing is NOT life, that is prison, and LOVE does not thrive or live in darkness.... talk to your children and let them help you..... do NOT give up your kids for a man like this........ there is help out there for women..... look on here or go to the library or church , etc.... there are grants to go back to school...... as for jobs, start small.... work at wal mart...... work at sonic...... there are other options...... that diamond ring can not give you hugs and kisses and smiles and love....... and nether can he....... God bless
2006-08-30 21:45:05 · answer #7 · answered by Annie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The time for you to accepted the situation .the first question is why you wanted to get job ,because of the financial or you need something like meeting people. never get panic ,started to believe
in your self , be happy ,smile what ever you feel fain,remember your goal is to keeping what you have right know ,serve your partner be sincerely, be ones respect to your self ,time for you to be alert in applying your sincerity, never get bad mood, to get rich
your freedom wit out loss your property
2006-08-30 21:38:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pawn that ring and get the hell out!
2006-08-30 21:20:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
adsfsdf
2006-08-30 21:28:18 · answer #10 · answered by Lothario 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋