We fight constantly I am moving in & out of his pad I am Hurt, ******* Pissed-Off, Sad (really sad)..and when it's good it's good...The Sex is awsome..BUT the Trust Factor is gone...He seems to need acceptance from a lower standard type of crowd..I hate that I love him...H E L P!!!! (I'm running out of joy I feel depressed all the time) I feel physically drained and unhealthier than I did before this relationship...BUT yet he loves me...:LOL! Love isn't fun guys!!! I want out of LOVE...
2006-08-30 19:28:13 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Women's Health
Hi Virgoblue, I'm Corry. I don't read the other answers until after so I don't know if you're expecting, accepting or receiving answers from guys but here one is. I can empathize with you because I have been cheated on as well by a GF. It bites! Your BF brazenly slept with someone else knowing full well that it would hurt you. Surely he didn't think you'd be okay with it. A great big sad thing here is that by moving in and out of his place you are in essence giving him permission to crap on your life again because there are no reprocusions for his incredibly negative and hurtful behaviour. He claims to love you? I know it's a tough time now. I honestly do. Virgoblue,,,,if you throw away everything else that I say, please take this to heart. ~ In the grand scheme of life, saying "I love you" is a pretty simple thing. Don't you think? LIVING it is quite another. Living "I love you" takes alot more inner strength. It takes turning away no matter what the temptation to stray, simply because you know it would hurt the one you love. It is respect, common courtesy, good judgement, honesty, and you'll need to finish the list with what YOU feel makes up love. ~ Please, for your own sake, don't give him a licence to further humiliate, disrespect, dishonour, and hurt you. After all, it isn't love that hurts us. You've exprienced it. You know how it CAN be. It's people who aren't being honest with their partner or themselves when they say I love you who hurt others. Love, the real thing,,,,,,,, is wonderful! All the best to you Virgoblue.
2006-08-30 21:46:48 · answer #1 · answered by Corry. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your problem is that you are so dependent on the comfort of being in a relationship. A lot of women that I know have experienced this phenomenon one way or the other. I do not want to answer your question by conjuring feminine stereotypes, but women typically feel the need to be safe and secured and that often comes with being with a man or in a relationship. Even if you are not satisfied by his character or you feel abused mentally by the relationship, you would likely not leave, because there is a comfort in knowing that somebody else thinks of you, and that you are a part of someone else’s life. I believe that you can get a lot done by talking to your BF in a grown up manner- sitting him down, and telling him exactly how you feel. That way, you guys can flush out a lot things, and probably have a much better prediction of your future together.
2006-08-30 19:57:35 · answer #2 · answered by josephine80002003 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a tough decision when you love someone. But sometimes you need to give some tough love out. You gotta do what makes you happy, otherwise you won't be healthy after awhile. Your heart tells you to stay but your head says to get rid of the dumb bastard.
The choice is yours. But know this......trust is an important factor for a relationship. You can have love...but if the trust isn't there, then eventually it will eat away at your love and it will all be gone.
A suggestion might be to take a break from the relationship for both your sakes for a spell and let things heal. Observe his behavior and see if he can earn the trust back. But go on with your life and don't let it eat at you.
You need to take control of your life. Don't let him see that you will put up with it. Make him earn it back. You are the trophy and the prize.
Good luck
2006-08-30 19:39:18 · answer #3 · answered by RangerBob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
split up for awhile, if you try to force feelings onto yourself that simply are no longer there, then you may never get them back.
Get some breathing space, and make sure your choice is the one you can live with, to go back or not to go back.
leaving is the fair thing to do for you as well as your bf.
He may not want a commitment right now, his actions seem to prove so.
Plus it would guarantee that there are no deep scars for either of you to live with.
If you are ready for a commitment there is nothing wrong with that, you just chose the wrong person to fulfill that agenda.
You deserve to have a relationship that doesn't have cheating involved in its past.
you can love him all you want but there is no rule written in stone that you have to be joined at the hip.
2006-08-30 19:42:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
WoW I'm in the same situation as you but I was the one that cheated. I would advise you to leave the relationship. Me and my man have been together for 5 years. I cheated on him 2 and half years ago and he still brings that s*** up. He told me that he loved me to much to let me go, We argue all the time and everytime he always brings up the cheating. I'm warning you, you'll go through the same thing and eventually you'll start cheating on him. Hope this helps
2006-08-30 19:38:30 · answer #5 · answered by daja0104 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can be unhappy by yourself, you do not need him to do that. Move on, it will not be easy, but most things worth having are not easy. He is not the only one you can have great sex with, beside you can not have sex all the time. Find someone you can trust and have great sex with, but get to know yourself, first, do not jump from the frying pan into the fire.
2006-08-30 19:36:06 · answer #6 · answered by RY 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so the sex is great who cares? i mean really hun you can find good sex somewhere else. if i were you i would pack my bags and be gone for good. and question if the guy loves you why did he cheat on you? leave him and find a man who will treat you better.
2006-08-31 06:36:52 · answer #7 · answered by Jill T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you said it yourself, the trust factor is gone.
do what your trust factor has done before - go.
he has done it once, he will do it again, no matter what he promises you.
he does NOT love you, otherwise we would'nt have cheated on you!
i know this hurts, but leave him and go for someone who really loves you.
2006-08-30 20:05:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never think with your stiopit Pu$$y. think with your mind if you have. He has once cheating but think with your Conscience you have cheated more than 100 times
2006-08-30 19:40:57 · answer #9 · answered by bravelionlion 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
~Stop thinking with your pus sy, toots. This ain't love. you're just a horney LOSER. Does the word "shrink" mean anything to you?
2006-08-30 19:34:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋