Hi All;) .. When people ---> See details?

Question

--> .. say something angrily during an argument, is it likely to represent true thoughts or feelings.. even though later they say they 'didn't mean it'?;)
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Thanks, for answering in advance! ;D

Thanks, Linty! ;D
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Thanks, TrickMeNicely;)

Answer 1

it depends...sometimes people have unfinished business from the past and that can be triggered by something that happens in the present (similar to the psychological wounding from their past) the uncounsicious will take over and determine the individual's response. they will just react to the present situation in an attempt to resolve the the similar issue from the past. they will either not know why they said someting or it will trigger a memory and they will realize that their behavior had nothing to do with the person they were with. however, sometimes it is like the freudian slip where their true feelings/thoughts about the person are revealed and there is an opportunity for the person to recognize what they really are feeling.

Answer 2

Hi Kimberly. I absent-mindedly forgot how great your questions were.........it's been a while:)))

I don't know if it represents a person's true feelings although in some cases it may. I think a person may have thought of the hurtful statement before but then a situation occurs and they get angry and it comes out. They strike out to try and hurt but it doesn't necessarily mean they meant it.
I've thought negative things about people know but it's more of just a passing thought---then I let it go. It seems natural to have negative thoughts about the people in our lives sometimes(due to pain or bad moods, etc.) but if it is truly believed and it festers and there is some resentment, then during an argument the true feelings will come out.


Me I avoid arguments like a plague. Something can always be talked out sensibly:)))
Good question!

Answer 3

Often what is said during such heated discussions is, in fact, what the person is really thinking, unless they are saying something just to hurt you.

It's great when people apologize, and very often the apology means "I'm sorry I made you feel bad", and acceptance of the apology helps them feel forgiven for having done so.

After anger has subsided and the smoke clears it's wise to reflect on what was said in the heat of anger to see what, if anything, we can do to correct the problem and/or address the accusation or negative statements. What is said in anger should often be taken in the same way one takes words spoken sarcastically: there's at least an element of truth, so we should consider that.

Most of us regret the way we have said/communicated some things, but even so, we often really felt/meant what we said.

Answer 4

They most likely mean it at the time...and, at the time...it very likely represents their true thoughts and feelings. It's usually pent-up stuff that's been in their head for some time, and when the moment comes, out it comes...like throwing up. Sort of like "Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks". But after it's out, and they hear their own words and the possible consequences thereof , they often recant. Not that they didn't mean it...they did...it's just that now they often see that they were wrong, that they had distorted the situation in their own mind. I think it's healthy, albeit risky, to go ahead and have a robust argument and get some of this stuff out in the open and clear it up. It's like defragging your hard drive.

Answer 5

When it comes to that it all depends on the situation.

At times it's a high chance that what they do say out of anger is how they truly feel but kept inside out of respect. Then out of anger they might use it as ammunition in their argument. Usually when arguments break out and words like, "I hate you" or vague insults are just brought up in the spur of the moment. Yet if the insults are personal and detailed it's for sure that those are the person's true thoughts.

Answer 6

"Hello Kimberly!
Anger is the key to your question. Anger is a father of ignorance. Actually, I believe we have no need for it in this day and time. Although I get angry very rarely, when I do I know that impulsively reacting to it is a mistake. I just don't venture an opinion anymore when I'm angry. Since its embarrassing, that I must admit anger towards someone in my own heart and mind, I'd rather suffer it without confirmation to the source of the feelings. Therefore, the only time it's use is worthwhile is when I'm disappointed with myself. I fix my error in memory with anger. That means there are many pathways back to the neural net that contains my feelings of it. It's in my head and in my heart. Because of those facts, I get a little stronger and faster in recognition and transfer each time I face it.
Thank G-d I have little use for it anymore!"

Answer 7

A male and female has been known to shell out words from anger which is a result of loss of control in their emotions and not necessarily true, but I would say that 6% of them were meant to hurt as a result of unfavorable circumstances.
They argue...she leaves...goes to a friends house gets drunk and gets laid by a total stranger.... which means the argument is now settled as to why she was unfavorable to him.

They argue, he leaves goes to a friends house and gets drunk and gets laid by a girl he doesn't even know, which means the argument settled as to why she was unfavorable to him....can you understand what I am saying here?

No matter what happens in an argument the Man always thinks he's right because he has found her unfavorable...which could be anything from a flirt to bad in bed or poor habits...etc THE MAN WANTS DOMINION AND POWER.

Answer 8

I would say that when someone says something angrily it almost always means that that is how they truely feel. Otherwise, why would they talk with such anger and emphasism about it. Obviously, they may say later that they didn't mean it purely to not hurt the other person's feelings but in their heart they know they meant it.
~ Well that's my opinion anyways.

Answer 9

It believe what's stated in an argument is someone's true thoughts without social inhibitions. I think we people apologize it's because of the way it came out and as to the fact that you now know something they've been concealing.

Answer 10

The person might feel that way in the heat of the moment but might feel different later