has anyone had to deal with loved one diing of cancer? need some help respond my email is [e-mail]

Question

my dad has 6 months to live i need help

Answer 1

my dad died of cancer and my mother died of cll which is leukemia.

from experience, get hospice. without them, we could not have made it. i can tell you that you need to talk with your dad as much as you can in the next few weeks before the morphine takes his mind too far. my mother went through so much that she was in a coma off and on for about a month before she died. when she was awake and could talk, she tried to tell us goodbye. she died holding my sisters hand on one side and mine on the other. it was peaceful then, but leading up to the final breath was really hard.

its so hard to sit there and watch them in pain and knowing that they are in pain and there is nothing that you can do but to try to make them more comfortable. the feelings of helplessness are pretty bad.

my mother died at home like she wanted. we were with her when she took her last breath and i am thankful that it was peaceful. she was not herself for a while before that, but would have minutes of knowing who she was and what was happening.

again, we could not have done it without hospice. they were great and i have to say that they did a lot for us, both physically and mentally. they have grief counselors that you can talk to.

another part that was so hard for me was when she was talking about my brother and my grandmother. she kept asking me if i could see them. i knew it was time. hospice had prepared us for that. they told us that she was asking to be let go. when i told her that i wanted her to tell grandma hello for me, she was more at ease.

please, for your own sake, call hospice and talk to them. they really do help.

if you want you can email me.

Answer 2

Yes,my mom died of cancer of the esophgus on 7-28-01.I am so sorry to hear about your Dad.You need to be strong for your Dad.Easier said than done ,huh.I know it is ripping you up inside but try to make everyday count.Do you live by him?Take him places-the park,mountains,a picnic,or even an aquarium.That was where my mom wanted to go but we only made it to a couple of those places.Do you have family that can help you?I only had my 12 year old son because my now ex-husband slammed me with divorce papers at the same time.Nice guy.If I can make it then you can!I would advise you find some support groups online.I wish I knew of some.

Answer 3

i am not sure how old you are but my father died when i was 11 from cancer and it is tuff at that age and it can be the same or worst as you get older. it depends on how close you are to him and involved he is in your life. if you have kids they will watch how you and he handle this and it will have an effect on them. the full effect will not be known till after he dies and you start looking at things that you wished you had done. i can tell that it has an effect on you now so now is when you need to make sure to deal with it in a good way. just so that you know it is hard on him to. there are things going through his mind to. so good one on one time talking will help now and in the future. I hope that God is a part of both of your lives because He can work now more than ever to heal problems and give comfort. He is only a prayer away. i would ask you to include your mother in this time too because it will be hard for her too. i hope that this helps all of you.

Answer 4

my grammie passed away from breast cancer and it was a really hard time for the whole family, that was 3 years ago and the family is finally coming back together. My advice would be to spend as much time with him as you can, do things with him that he's wanted to do for a long time, whether it be to watch a movie, go to a certain park, eat somewhere...
Don't spend time arguing over who said what or did this or wants that...cause before you know it, time will have passed by and you will have spent all that time arguing. Never turn down an opportunity to see him or do something with him. Don't pamper him and make him feel unable to do things on his own. God Bless.

Answer 5

sadly yes i have but we didnt get six months more like 3 weeks right now i know you can only focus on your upcoming loss but right now is the time to spend as much time as possible with your dad do the things he want done before he passes. this will be hard but honoring his wishes before he goes will make it easier to deal with my mother was never big on taking photos so when she passed i didnt have any photos to show my two children we go to her grave site every holiday and i let the kids put new flowers on the head stone and we talk about how she was when she was here. just know that this would be a good time to have family close to help you through this time.

Answer 6

Hi I am soo sorry, and yes my aunt died and my cousin, and a friend, so i know how hard it is, and dont listen to what the haters say to you, just keep praying because that is what your relative needs, its hard yeas but with gods will everything will be better in the end(if i offend you by talking about god i am sorry) but i will pray for him her and you also so that you may find peace during this hard time in your life. Im sorry Jalea

Answer 7

I lost my dad almost 3 years ago, it's never easy. It never gets easier, but take the months that you do have left with your dad and make the most of them. Just be with him, spend time with him, ask him all the questions you can think of. Take a video diary of the two of you...believe me it will be hard to watch, but eventually it will be the most treasured thing you own

Answer 8

yes iahve dealt with this my dad died of cancer, it is very hard just spend all the time u can with him, say everything u ever wanted to say and just spend time cuz u will never get it back. I just realized recently that i have a old answering machine that was his and it recorded alot of his conversations by accident but it was fun to listen to, he had conversation with my uncle and his friends and just his outgoing message is nice to hear sometimes.

Answer 9

not cancer but my dad died on the 18th of this month . if u want 2 talk dont hesitate in contacting me.
sorry ur going through this
take care

Answer 10

Disregard the rudeness from the above person...I have been there two times with family. You can reach me at [e-mail], sometimes you just need to talk to someone who has been there.