How can i get my husband back when he is sleeping with my best friend?

Question

I don't know why i want him back so bad. I know i just can't stop loving him. My so called best friend has talked him out of everything that he was suppose to do with me and my son. he is being so nice to me right now i know its over but in ways i want him back or maybe its i don't want him with her. She has went behind my back when i was telling her stuff and she told him everything i saying. She was doing stuff with him but never with me and we only been split up for 3 or 4 weeks now. I just want to pay them back and don't know how to do it. I have a 14 month old son that needs his dad all the time. He is missing out of alot of stuff maybe i should feel bad about that but i do. he wants to talk face to face i not sure what to say please someone help me................................

Answer 1

Don't get him back, get back at him.

Answer 2

You should be very pleasant due to your son. Being bitter because of his other/new relationship will do absolutely no good. It will cost you big time in the end with your son. You don't want your friend to have him, you have been betrayed by both. If he is that impressionable you Do Not Want him. Be glad that his true colors have revealed themselves now rather than later when you've been together 10-20yrs and have several children. It not easy to let go, but you can out shine them all by being the Better, Bigger person. Display nothing but concern for your son, his well being and happiness. That will throw them for a loop or two in itself. And your doing the right thing for your son's future. It never pays to talk smack to a child about the absent parent. You will have to let time and events show the child unfortunately. And it will, it never fails. But it not your place no matter what to place your feelings on your son. As much as possible let him see two loving parents that have only concern for him and his future. Be as strong as you possibly can in times of confrontation. Try never to argue in front of your son nor his new girl. You will be really pleased with your overall outcome. You will be the Ultimate Winner. Don't ever let them see or know you sweat! Be strong after all you are Woman!

Answer 3

A lot of what you are feeling is grief and pain over a very big betrayal in your life. Do not allow anyone to minimize your feelings. And know that the feelings you are experiencing are very normal. It is easy for people to tell you to lose him...he isn't worth it, and so on. But it is far harder to actually do this. But I do believe that what happens in our lives actually does happen for a reason. You may not realize, or want to see it that way right now, and that is very understandable.

I think the first thing you might want to think about doing is finding a very good therapist or clergy person to help you sort out your feelings about this. Ask your family for their support and their shoulders to cry on....you will need that more than you know.

Finally, cry buckets if you have to. Wail, and scream and feel like absolute do-do for a while. Really wallow in it. But don't wallow for a long time. Pick your self up and move forward, with or without your husband.

I wish you the best, and peace and light.

Answer 4

Wooooaaahh! Back up here. He is your husband, which means he's supposed to be loyal. A lot of men get interested elsewhere when their wife has just had a baby, when her energy and attention is taken from him, to the new baby. And he went off with your "best friend"..? Ma'am, she is NOT your best friend. No kind of friend would do such a thing, they have both betrayed you to such a callous degree, you should never have to look at or speak to either of them again.
And as for getting him back, kiss him goodbye like last years' flu. He's poison. And as for them together? Look at the deal she's getting! He's a snake, and when she needs him most, he won't be there for her, I can guarantee that.
He will have to live with what he has done to you, and his new-born son, for the rest of his days. They won't be happy, long term.
All you need is to heal, get over the grief of this marriage ending. It must hurt like hell, but this is better than having him back, for a little while, until he clears off again.
Make a clean break. Put your son first, get strong, as you, yourself, your own person. Look hard into someone, before you trust them with your heart again.
May you find the peace and love that you deserve.

Answer 5

You should just forget about him! And her! They really are not people you should spend time even thinking about because they have hurt you so badly. Just move on and get on with your life. That's the only thing I can say because it's the only thing that will work. Don't go back to him, don't take him back, and don't let her back into your circle. Just take care of your son because he needs you right now. And don't be surprised if his father doesn't have enough time for him either. Ever watched the movie Hope Floats? It's a very good example of just this type of thing.

Just focus your time on your son right now. I'm sure someone better will come along in time. But do not go back to him.

Answer 6

I would let him go, if he cheats on you once, he'll doit again! and I wouldn't be friends with old girl anymore, if she was truely your friend she wouldn't have allowed that to happen! right now, you're in denial, and you need to just let them go and focus on you and your child. He don't need a dad, he needs a mom that'll be there for him at least. you will eventuall find another guy, that will treat you right, and he can be the role model that your son needs....right now he's too young to really care if he has a dad or not. So don't use your son as an excuse to getting back someone that pooped on you becuz you're afraid of being alone and doing the finding another partner process over again.

Answer 7

I think that the only reason you are wanting him back so badly is because he is with someone else. Its quite different when you are separated and alone. That's how it is for me. I feel like I could possibly want him back if he was with someone else because that is just instinct, but if I didn't want him back when he was alone, what good is that? It sounds to me like you need to dump them both and move on with your life. You can find a better friend who won't screw your man and a better man who will stand by your side the whole way. I've been there, done that, got the t-shirt on the whole cheating thing. Believe me, they don't change...they'll do it again eventually. Hope this helps.

Answer 8

Well, if he cheats on you this time, then he will do it if you take him back. It just goes to show that your friend was not that much of a friend if she is sleeping with your husband, and that is why she got close to you, is so that she could find a way to get him. The best way to get them back is for you to file for a divorce, sock him for child support, and move on with your life, and be happy that you are rid of the lying cheating sob. Just be glad that she has him now, and after a while he will dump her, and move on again. The best revenge is to just do nothing, sit back and watch and laugh when his life falls apart in the future because what comes around, goes around and they will both get what is coming to them in the future. Some one that cheats on you, especially with your best friend, is not worth crying over, and there are people out there that will love you, and never hurt you. It will be hard, but you can do it, trust me, I know, I went through it 4 years ago when my husband ran off with my so called best friend, same thing, she would tell him stuff behind my back, and used me to find out stuff about him. You can move on, and you need to for the sake of your child, he deserves to have a better life than to watch his father cheat on his mother and hurt her like that... Be strong for him... dump the loser

Answer 9

Time to act your age and tell Him to get his act together. Your 18 month old son can get over the old man if You have the strength to keep him out of your life. If he is dumb enough to let his crotch run his life You are better off without him. Instead of romancing the past live in the present and look to the future with a better man in your life. Why try to keep someone that has given up so easily on You and the son.

Take the money and run. Do all you can to get as much out of him as possible. Keep track of all his assets so when the time comes he does not hide them. Get ready for being a single parent and line up a reliable baby sitter. Then You can restart your life and find happiness instead of dwelling on the past. Get with it.

Answer 10

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Your "so called" best friend talked your "so called" husband... what, she held a gun to his head?

Sorry, he's a willing participant. Don't go throwing all the blame on your so called friend.

Dump both of them, get a divorce, move on with your life. Hopefully you'll find a man who can be the type of father your son deserves, because he sure as hell doesn't deserve the sperm donor you're trying to get back.

Answer 11

Is this true? If it is you need a to do a couple of things. Firstly pray. Ask God to help you (He will) and then forgive both of these people for the way that have deceived you and betrayed you. Then find a good church where the pastor preaches from the Bible, and attend it regularly.
Having done that tell your husband that you want him back (if you still do) on the condition that he not see this woman (or any other woman) again.
There are worse things than being alone, being constantly betrayed is one of them.
I hope it all sorts out for you...