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I got into a fight with a friend and she called me self centered and that i only care about my boyfriend and myself. Its so not true. She freaked out because I don't constantly ask her how she is. I'm not self centered. If I was self centered why would I care for my sisters when they had mono, why would i baby sit my sisters kids for free, why would I help my sister after her sugury and after one got teeth pulled. Why did I do community service for people when I was a bit younger. I'm so angry. Is it wrong for me to feel this way?

2006-08-30 09:36:48 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Friends

I used to talk about my boyfriend to her but I don't anymore I only answer her questions about him and then change the subject to something away from him so she won't get ticked off.

2006-08-30 13:18:34 · update #1

23 answers

Don't be angry. Just take a good look at yourself. After that, if you still believe it's not true then blow it off knowing she was wrong. If you find it may be true, then just ask her how she feels now and then. No harm will be done.

2006-08-30 09:42:38 · answer #1 · answered by Ray 7 · 0 0

Sometimes when a girl gets a man in her life, they tend to not spend as much time with their old friends anymore. It's never an intentional thing, it just happens because the boyfriend is exciting and new and feels good. You think that a true friend would understand and accept this. However, most girls suddenly feel rejected by their old friends when this happens. They feel like they've been there for you through thick and thin, but then when you get a man, you abandon them.

My advice is to make up with your friend. I've been on both sides of this fence (both the rejected and the rejector). I've had boyfriends come and go but true friends are hard to find. Try to make a little more time for your friend. Your boyfriend should understand. It sounds like an emotionally charged fight and if you both took time to talk about it, and listened to the others point of view, you could probably work it out and save a great friendship.

2006-08-30 16:50:05 · answer #2 · answered by Miss V. 2 · 0 0

Sounds like she is just a tad bit needy. I'd talk to her...tell her that you don't feel as though you're self centered. Maybe because of your boyfriend, you've withdrew from her a bit. Hear her out for what she has to say. Maybe she has a valid point. Or maybe she is just way too needy and needs to back off. Either way, you need to talk to her and get this out in the open. Then from there, you can figure out if you want to continue your friendship.

2006-08-30 16:40:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Talk to her about it. Ask her why she called you self centered. She had to have a reason for saying it. Maybe you do talk about your boyfriend and your life too much and she is tired of it. Don't let a relationship go to waste because of it. The best thing to do is talk it out. Listen to her point of the story. Then tell your part of the story. Good luck. Hope this helps.

2006-08-30 20:12:58 · answer #4 · answered by diane976821 1 · 0 0

from my perspective, your only helping people when they need you. Also, these "needs" are physical, and your friend's need is mentally. She may just feel like you don't care much about her. Being friends with someone is NOT easy, especially if you are self centered like me. I am working on it though. Maybe she's just giving you an eye-opener? Friendship goes both ways, you don't just get the enjoyment of having someone to talk to, hang out with, or just the fact. If your doing that, then your friend will get nothing, she'll just be giving you anything a friend gives. Hope that makes sense.

2006-08-30 16:48:12 · answer #5 · answered by im that short person! 2 · 0 0

I don't think you're self centered at all. It's not wrong for you to feel this way. She's probably just annoyed because your spending time with your bf instead of spending time with her. It's usual. It happens with everyone, the friend goes, why didn't you call me back..your so self centered! It's only because they miss you since your hangin out with your bf. Try and get her a bf..then she'll realize that what she said makes no sense at all.

2006-08-30 16:40:00 · answer #6 · answered by nerd.:) 4 · 0 0

I see why your angry, but maybe she doesnt mean your completely self centered, but she may feel that when you two are together all you can chat about is your "life". Maybe she would like you to ask how she is...or whats new w/her. I have a friend who always had something to say about her relationship 24/7...I was more than happy to listen, but I at times thought she was only about herself when it came to our conversations. I don't think she is overall self centered, but at those times she was all about her. Maybe re think why she is saying this...and then talk to her about it.

2006-08-30 16:43:07 · answer #7 · answered by ME 2 · 0 0

When someone criticizes you, it is normal to feel attacked. All you can do is give their criticism reasonable consideration, and decide whether or not it is justified. Many people make blanket statements about other people's behavior, when they are really only upset about one thing. In your case, it sounds like your friend just wants to be reassured that she is important in your life, whether you have a boyfriend or not. Maybe you could plan a date with her, she may just be feeling left out--especially if she has no boyfriend.

2006-08-30 16:42:28 · answer #8 · answered by Nefertiti 5 · 0 0

maybe ur friend is going through a "phase". if she's ur good friend u shuld try to find out what the problem is. if she continues to feel and acts this way maybe she's changed. maybe u two can't be as close as u used to be.

u don't sound like a self centred person but ppl who help others from the heart don't have to say and list every good thing they did. maybe u just like to say it all out. i don't know.

2006-08-31 00:58:58 · answer #9 · answered by greenT 3 · 0 0

she could be right, to a degree, but not necessarily. you have to evaluate the entire situation, and ask yourself, do i do more things for others in my whole entire life and world, than i do myself? If you do more things for yourself, then maybe you are slightly self centered, but be honest. or, she could be jealous of how NON self centered you are.

for more advice, check out my site.

www.freewebs.com/askruth

2006-08-30 16:41:38 · answer #10 · answered by askruthh 1 · 0 0

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