My fiance is a strong believer of a woman should work but he also thinks they are the only one responsible for the upkeep of the house and children. He will NOT lift a fingure to help with anything. What can i do to get him more involved with our family life and to help out with dinner and things. I would be happy if his dirty clothes made it to the laundry basket instead of all over the house.
2006-08-30 09:01:56 · 18 answers · asked by Nicole W 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Trade him in for a modern version!! U dont need to be a slave in this day and age!!
Dont marry him!!!!!
2006-08-30 09:04:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
So he thinks women should work and then come home and do all the house cleaning and child care? What does he do? 1/3 of that?
I'd kick him out. Tell him you need some time apart and since you do everything, you don't see a need for him. You are raising children and right now he's just one more child to raise. Tell him you don't want your children picking up his awful habits regarding women and that it would be better if you two seperated for awhile. Believe me, it's not like he'll ever find a woman who's going to work outside the house then come home and do everything there too. It's a ridiculous notion.
You need to do something fast before your kids start treating you and other women with that same disrespect. Or, split the chores up between you two and start charging him money for every one you have to do for him.
Good luck
2006-08-30 09:17:50 · answer #2 · answered by Miss. Bliss 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How can he be stuck in the 1900's if you have to work ??? Women didn't work then except for around the house !!!
Tell you what................stop doing his laundry, stop cooking for him, and stop cleaning and doing the dishes and things like that. It would be tough to live with for a while but he should get your point. If not, then you're REALLY dumb if you still plan on marrying this guy. His laziness and attitude will just get worse don't you think ??
2006-08-30 09:17:41 · answer #3 · answered by gozedown 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it doesn't sound like he is living in the dark ages, but just that he is a slob. tell him that if he wants you to work outside the home, then he must not expect you to be the only one working inside the home. lay down the law, sweetie. there needs to be a balance of responsibility in the house. you need to work out chores that you each do and stick to it. tell him that you are not his maid and that you will not pick up his clothes after him. if he continues to leave them laying around, stack them up in a pile and leave them. eventually, he won't have any clean clothes to wear and you will have made a point about how you are not going to wait on him hand and foot. or you could always start throwing anything he leaves laying around away and when he gets mad, say, "well, honey, i figured that if you threw it on the floor, you must have considered it to be trash."
failing that, dump him. in some cases, you can't change stuff like this and if you choose to try, you do have a battle on your hands. *crap like that makes me mad on your behalf* good luck!
(oh and stop cooking for him - only make enough for you. tell him that when he helps you out around the house, he will have earned his meal, otherwise, he can make the damn thing himself. eventually, you will either have thrown everything away - at which point you won't have much to pack when you move, or he will have gotten the idea and will start helping.)
2006-08-30 09:09:17 · answer #4 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This one is pretty simple.
Ask him to put his dirty clothes in the basket and help out around the house. If he doesn't and it is that big an issue for you, you should consider getting a new fiance.
2006-08-30 09:05:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow!! Its seems like he thinks he's living with his mama and not his soon to be wife!! Quite possibly this this the way his dad treats or treated his mom. Honestly, if he refuses to help out you're better off without him. You need a man to share the responsibilities with not another kid that you have to take care of. Best of luck!!
2006-08-30 09:29:33 · answer #6 · answered by Jen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say "fiance"???........I would send this momma's boy packing back to his mother. Shame on you......why are you playing house and having kids then????? Get some smarts, sweetie! You kinda asked for it.....ya know!
2006-08-30 09:06:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
realize that u cant change a man...no matter how hard you try. and accept the fact that u are either gonna have to deal with it or leave because it wont change after u get married.
2006-08-30 09:05:08 · answer #8 · answered by Tracy C 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
tell him to wake up and smell the coffee. we're in the 21st century where husband and wife are equal. tell him that things doesn't get up and do itself. have you try to just let his dirty laundry sit if he doesn't pick up after himself?
2006-08-30 09:06:41 · answer #9 · answered by samdrian 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Think twice about marrying this sponger. In fact, if he doesn't change pronto, kick him to the curb and find someone who truly loves and respects you. Obviously, he doesn't!!
Chow!!
2006-08-30 09:06:19 · answer #10 · answered by No one 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋