I live in the Commonwealth state of Virginia, and my family is telling me that my ex can not have men over staying the night with her while my kids are there unless they are married, and that I can call social services to go over and see if he's there at like 1am, because it confuses the children....We just broke up 1 month ago and now another man is staying there, my 4 year old keeps asking me questions and is so confused, and im not sure what to tell her...My question is has anyone else ever heard of this law? unwed single mothers having men over not being allowed? the same goes for the fathers as well....I need to do something, I can't have my kids see'n a new man in the bed every month....anyone with any knowledge or experience with this, please speek up and let me know anything I can know, thanks!
2006-08-30 08:50:20 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
As a matter of fact, it is a law......or here in my state of South Carolina it is. Once you are seperated or divorced even, you can not have "overnight guest" of the opposite sex. If she does, and you can prove it, haul her to court and take those kids from her. They have enough going on right now dealing with the break-up so they don't need to be exposed to her new LAY!!!!!
2006-08-30 10:52:02 · answer #1 · answered by dixiegirl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I do not know of any law that prohibits a person staying over/sleeping at another persons house. If you are still married and not divorced that would be adultery and about all that is good for is a divorce. I have seen some divorce decrees that prohibit the parents from having others sleep over until they remarry but this is rare. If you are concerned about the children you need to document every thing you can good and bad and then go to court and maybe limit visitation if she continues this type of behavior. I agree with you it is not healthy for the children to have a parade of partners going through a house. But please do not talk bad about you ex in front of the children and also help them through the rough time by being there for them day or night.
2006-08-30 09:19:33 · answer #2 · answered by middle aged and love it 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no such law. She can sleep with whomever she likes. If there are numerous men to the point that you consider it a problem for your childs wellfare then you can call child protective services but chances are they are not going to follow through on report about the fact that your ex is in a sexual relationship with 1 other man that you think is morally wrong because they are not married.
It is unfortunate that she doesn't consider the effect her behavior is having on her children. But it is not illegal.
2006-08-30 09:15:31 · answer #3 · answered by Suesan W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about Virginia because I live in Texas, but it seems to me that if the two of you were not married then you aren't going to have much ground to stand on about this. It's really hard to say it's wrong for her to have a man there because they aren't married if you were never married to her either. Also, definitely be careful about involving social services in your life. It's hard to get rid of them once they are involved and do you really want strangers making decisions that affect your life and your children's' lives also. Try to resolve this with her, but remember that any ground rules that you lay down you will have to follow too.
2006-08-30 09:15:29 · answer #4 · answered by vickyc76 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he is using you. I am so very sorry to say that. I was in a similar situation, only the fellow started bothering me *after* he married someone else. His wife did not know he was bothering me, however, so it worked when I called her. If his wife is willing to keep him, even after getting caught, then she is a fool. If she would get upset, you could use the fact that she might take his kids away from him in a divorce to your advantage. A restraining order would work if he is stalking you. Otherwise, you must be strong and tell him, in no uncertain terms, to go away and never come back. I know you love him, but this is a toxic situation and you need to get out.
2016-03-27 01:30:31 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are asking about an unwed mother with children but is that not what you were doing? Maybe you should have been married. Then you would have had some recourse in gaining custody of your children. As it is you were no better only the lucky sperm.
2006-08-30 09:36:14 · answer #6 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st u should express ur concern to ur wife and make sure that u let her know that it's concern for the children.. now if she agrees and keeps doing what she's doing then i'd speak to a lawyer to see what more u can do.. calling social services i'm not sure about cause u might get results that u weren't looking for and u don't want them to take ur kids from their mother and put them w/u do u...
2006-08-30 08:54:31 · answer #7 · answered by Queen D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesnt sound like a "law". But my guess is that if you were to keep record of who shes seeing/sleeping with and for how long, you could probably call Social Services and report her as unfit.
2006-08-30 08:55:07 · answer #8 · answered by t_matczak 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should have gotten married before you had children.
2006-08-30 09:37:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel your anguish....but there is nothing you can do. You can't jail her for wanting to move on with her life....regardless of children.
2006-08-30 10:27:51 · answer #10 · answered by Tony 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋