Would you sign the final divorce paper given the ff demands from the ex-wife?

Question

A friend seeking some inputs. If you were in HIS shoe, what would you do? His divorce been going on for 3 yrs, married for 15 yrs (with 2 sons - 17 and 19) and he is earning 40k/annum. He has given almost 100k to the ex during the course of the divorce (including equties etc). His EX wants to remain JOBLESS for the rest of her life. The EX will agree to finalize/settle and sign the divorce paper if he will provide her $1,100/month Family Support, and lumpsum of 30k. (This is just in addition to the 50% of all his retirement benefits). BTW, his EX cheated on her.

Also, the he has paid total of 25K to the lawyer during the divorce process. He couldn't afford anymore to get another lawyer for financial reasons. The lawyer says if he does not agree with the EX's demands.. it might prolong the process and he has to pay more money to the lawyer. My friend lost his hair already due to STRESS! Poor guy.

Answer 1

yes why not,what is money if you are not happy

Answer 2

Ok if I were Him 1) I would either hire a private eye or I would ask a friend to follow my wife with a VIDEO camera and film her cheating on him. He should document the cheating and have physical proof (video, pictures). If she cheated it means she BROKE the legal binding contract, called a marriage certificate. And it can and should be used against her in the divorce. By using that evidence he may be able to reduce alimony or eliminate it.
2) hire a GOOD attorney, tell the lawyer about how SHE cheated and what she wants and how she plans not to work.
3) do not agree to HER demands since SHE is the one who cheated.
I would have my lawyer come up with something more favorable to me (the husband). She does not need any family support/ child support because her kids are 19 and 17 (almost legal age). Parents are only required to pay up to age 18.
He does not have the money to give her 1,100 a month nor can he give her a lump sum of money. In addition SHE CANT have any of his retirement benefits if it is in HIS name alone. So she can want it, but legally cant have it, nor would i give it to her.
In addition i would SELL all marital property (house, cars (if you have more than 2, one for him one for her) everything) and split it 50/50. If she wants to keep the house she MUST pay HIM for 50% cost of the house (buy him out). Good luck.

Answer 3

Go forward with the divorce, as though he have been mising or contesting as he's doing. The courts will form all this out and probabilities are you'll get custody with a few help, the residence and he'll commonly get state mandated visitation rights. Now if he will have to be offered spousal help considering you are making greater than he does, you'll be able to offset that with the youngster help offered you, if this occurs. You commonly can't get him dominated as an not worthy, damaging dad so that you might get him out of the image so take the help and manage the visitations if he even makes a decision to do them. Once once more if you happen to 2 can't determine the main points external courtroom,then the pass judgement on will, however except youve been charged with youngster or drug/intellectual abuse, you'll get computerized custody because the courts lean awarding custody to the mum. Good success and feature a great new yr.

Answer 4

Go ahead with the divorce, as if he were mising or contesting as he is doing. The courts will variety all this out and possibilities are you'll get custody with some aid, the house and he will in general get state mandated visitation rights. Now if he must be awarded spousal help on the grounds that you're making greater than he does, that you would be able to offset that with the youngster help awarded you, if this happens. You customarily are not able to get him ruled as an unfit, harmful dad so that you would get him out of the image so take the aid and handle the visitations if he even decides to do them. As soon as once more for those who two can not figure out the details outside court,then the choose will, but until youve been charged with baby or drug/intellectual abuse, you will get computerized custody because the courts lean awarding custody to the mummy. Good luck and have a super new 12 months.

Answer 5

If he can prove that she cheated on him then NO WAY should he sign those papers. If she has been jobless for most of their marriage, then she can file for alimony (spousal support)...enough to maintain her current lifestyle. BUT...the alimony is TAX DEDUCTIBLE for your friend, so that is something to consider.....and if I remember correctly she will have to pay taxes on it. I'm not 100% sure about that part, though. Anyway....I still say it's too much regardless of the tax breaks. She can't take 75% income and 50% retirement....and the 100k should be considered. He should really get a new lawyer.

Answer 6

One ... he only has to pay child support for one minor child but if the other is still living at home... and unless he's a major jerk I'm sure helping out with money for his children shouldn't be a big deal... Two .. at least as it is here in the state of california Unless a prenup is signed .. the wife gets half of all assetts purchased during the marriage regardless of infidelity.... and a Judge should set the alimony taking into account all the financial factors... Good Luck with that

Answer 7

What is the freaking hold up?!
His attorney rots!
Why has he given her all this dough? Was he court appointed to do so? Who cares what she wants to do with her life? She can sit on her butt if she'd like, but she'll have to figure out how to make that work with a lot less money than $1100 a month.
Is there no point at which, in your state, the divorce is settled by a judge?
No, he should absolutely not sign the papers. he should find a new attorney, hopefully this one isn't also getting sexual favors from his ex!

Answer 8

circulate forward with the divorce, as though he have been mising or contesting as he's doing. The courts will type all this out and probability is you will get custody with some help, the residing house and he will probable get state mandated visitation rights. Now if he must be provided spousal help in view which you're making better than he does, you could offset that with the youngster help provided you, if this occurs. you probable won't be able to get him ruled as an no longer worth, risky dad so for you to get him out of the image so take the help and cope with the visitations if he even decides to do them. as quickly as back in case you 2 won't be able to artwork out the info outdoors courtroom,then the choose will, yet except youve been charged with baby or drug/psychological abuse, you will get computerized custody because of the fact the courts lean awarding custody to the mummy. stable luck and have an incredible new twelve months.

Answer 9

Take a much smaller percentage of that amount, and get an Attorney. It would be money well spent..,

P.S. How the h*ll does he even live on what is left..,

$40,000 @ year.., after taxes.., Approx. $600.00 @ week net.

THIS DOES NOT EQUATE !!!

AND ....,So far as splitting the assets..., B*LLSH*T!!!

Take the money out of any account that they are familiar with and open something else...., QUIETLY !!

Somebody there needs to get a grip on REALITY !!

Answer 10

I hate money grubbin b!tches like that earn your keep get e job stop sponging you cheatin whore. He needs a new lawyer he only make 40,000 a year. That is not much. He couldn't survive

Answer 11

i don't think so she would have to get off her azz and get a job she should have thought about all she was risking when she decided to sleep with another man its not his place to keep her up the rest of his life he has a life of his own now i would tell to shove those divorce papers up her azz real quick