My husband cheated on me several years ago, but I can't seem to get over it. He denies it, but a woman knows!! I still feel insecure and it bothers me. I have had low self esteem ever since and that has never happened to me.
I love him and want to be together, I just can't shake it.
2006-08-30 06:00:14 · 12 answers · asked by Tina 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You will never get over it completely, but you can put it out of the ever-present , torture spot it's in now. Talk to him, and explain how it hurts....seek comfort and assurance from him, then move on! Not easy, but it can be done. His denial doesn't help either when you KNOW the truth. He needs to admit it, ask forgiveness, and then help you overcome it. Good Luck!!
2006-08-30 06:07:42 · answer #1 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband, who is soon to be my ex cheated on me also. At first I was trying everything to keep him and he just insisted on being with the other women. Finally when I decided that I did not want him anymore, he wanted to come back. But by then I had already realized that I would never be able to trust him again and that I would always feel insecure. You can forgive, which I have done, but you could never forget. If y ou are feeling like this, the feeling will probably never go away. So either you will have to stay and deal with it or move on and realize that you could be in another relationship where you feel secure and have a healthy self esteem. But make sure he really did cheat on you, you don't want to make a big mistake like that.
2006-08-30 13:10:17 · answer #2 · answered by jam_psb 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been cheated on in my current relationship, not physically but emotionally. It still hurt just as bad because it was like I wasn't enough emotionally, anyways, you will have a seriously hard time getting over it if you ever do. It has been a year since I found emails and phone calls to prove the cheating and I still have problems with self worth and esteem. As it probably did you, it made me feel worthless and like I wasn't good enough and that is a hard feeling to overcome. I lost all trust in my relationship and am trying to get it back to this day. All I know is that people do make mistakes and if you love him then follow your heart and try to trust again. Good luck!!!!
2006-08-30 13:10:14 · answer #3 · answered by chickadee112582 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A woman knows? Thats the proof you have that is ruining your marriage? Have you considered that maybe you are wrong, and your low self esteem doesnt have anything to do with your husband? And the stress of you thinking he cheated, and him denying it, in addition to him feeling accused 24/7 is putting a strain on your homelife enough to make you completely miserable?
Just let it go, all of it. Start a new phase, try to be happy with what you have. Or you can keep doing what you are doing and ruin his life and yours.
2006-08-30 13:19:19 · answer #4 · answered by n2bateyou2000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It happend to me too. My husband was sleeping with my sister. I wish I could help, but I can't seem to shake it either. I need to just get on with my life. But we have a daughter together.
You shouldn't feel insecure, you didn't do anything wrong. I know what your going through. If you need a friend, email me.
2006-08-30 13:23:25 · answer #5 · answered by Joy! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you do want to be with him like you say you need to stop living the past. I know it is hard but you say he denies it so he never really said it was true, so you need to drop it because he will start to get upset that you keep bring it up.
2006-08-30 13:10:21 · answer #6 · answered by Lady Dee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to make the choice without asking us help... because, if someone give all the answer like 1,000 of them to you. You will have it blocked to your mind and want to go back with him and you love him....
My wife said If I ever cheated and She will end the marriage and It over and no second chance. and she told me before we got married and I never once cheating on her.. so I am glad she told me that.
Really, you have to make the choice. you know him very well than we do. smiling. wish you luck.
2006-08-30 14:28:59 · answer #7 · answered by greenbaypackers1920 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think in this:if he is with you,the other woman mean nothing to him.If he is with you,mean he loves you.The other woman is past time.Can you imagine:the other woman is living happy,with not worries,and you are having a miserable life,because of her?It is not fair,forget about the past time,and try,please,to live your present,forget about that woman.You can say:rest in peace,past time.You can say: I deserve to be happy again,and do it.If you do not do so,you can be sick and the other woman does not care about you or your husband,Why? because is over.Good luck.And maybe the cheating never happened.So,why you need to worry or thinking about that?Be happy,please.
2006-08-30 16:52:21 · answer #8 · answered by cobrasnake 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u will never 4get but u can 4give and try to salvage the rest of your marriage trust will take awhile to regain but if you feel that he is worth it you have to give it your all as well as him try counseling or talking to your minister/pastor of a church good luck
2006-08-30 13:10:21 · answer #9 · answered by teresa d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a leap of faith. Trust him and just face the fear of being made a fool of. That is ALL you can do. Risk being made a fool of.
2006-08-30 13:17:45 · answer #10 · answered by InternetPosterChild 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋