my faince had problem expressing himself and his feeling! so i told him that its insecure about himself and thats the reason he doesnt let someone know how his feelings are and what he thinks about himself !! was it rude of me to tell him or did i did the right thing! !! worried !
2006-08-30 05:22:31 · 7 answers · asked by sandras 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's not always what you say, but how you say it. This doesn't mean that you need to tip toe around people or your fiance. What it does mean is that you need to remember that you and your fiance come from different backgrounds and different life experiences. So what may sound perfectly normal to you when saying it may not come across to him in the same way.
If he is insecure, rather than telling him "Hey you're insecure", if you truly love him you may want to find out why he has a difficult time expressing himself. It could be something as simple as his father modeled that kind of behavior for him or his mother perhaps. Sometimes people who don't share their feelings aren't insecure, they just don't see or feel the need too.
Rather than pointing a finger, open an ear. If he is insecure there is a good chance that he has a history of opening up to people only to be shot down for doing so or being mistreated when doing so. Insecurity often comes from a lack of trust.
So do some investigating with out accusing him of being something he might not be.
2006-08-30 05:32:26 · answer #1 · answered by big_dreamer2005 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dear !worried!
with full respect for your own feelings do i offer response to your question.
the experience shared with us of your relationship with fiance and about his lack of sharing and "expressing" is a fair intimation and quite common.
commonly in many relationships do person(s) with-hold ideas and/or the feelings related to these ideas.
an individuals personal 'expression' relates some awareness of what is an individuals personal 'awareness'.
that an individual do not relate (express) clearly to an other person may indicate 'confusion' with-in that very personal consciousness.
it may be agreed that insecurity is present in that being "insecure" with-in such an intimate seeking relationship such as prospective marriage partnering purposively indicate.
it remain with-in your personal conscious to more fully realize the nature of the insecurity of your fiance and his (and your own) ability to share these 'realizations'
i advise you would be cautious in evaluating what is your personal awareness and if you would present your concern to your fiance for relationship sharing it may greatly benefit a 'response' from him since clarity in sharing is aided when all considerations be respected. so, those of the mind (ideas) and feeling relationship to these ideas ... and please may each of you pay carefull attention to realize what be of a personal nature and what be of a more social (relationship) nature.
the preceding informations do be have most value for non-prejudicial sharing with/in clear and purposefull relationship.
be well always
2006-08-30 12:54:16 · answer #2 · answered by noninvultuous 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you truly care about this man, then no. It is very important to have open conversations in a relationship. In fact, it's paramount! Open conversations do not only apply to the pleasant ones. Maybe you can help your boyfriend to discover the reason for his insecurities.
2006-08-30 12:27:18 · answer #3 · answered by inet_guy_84 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did he ask? Were you in a discussion about this??? Other wise, never offer an opinion unless someone askes it, so yes, it was rude, especially if you like the guy.
2006-08-30 12:44:44 · answer #4 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
from your previous questions, sounds like you are the insecure one.
Most guys express themselves differently than women, why not except him for who he is
2006-08-30 12:26:23 · answer #5 · answered by Tim 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing. Help him boost his confidence though. Do not belittle and talk down to him.
2006-08-30 12:25:51 · answer #6 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, but it depends on how you said it. Did you say it out of anger or concern?
2006-08-30 12:26:33 · answer #7 · answered by Pamela N 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋