In an intimate friendship environment, friends may have expectations from you, which are not easy for you to fulfill. At the same time rejecting this kind of expectations might harm your relationship. For example consider that your buddy expects you to call him/her regularly everyday or week, or inviting them to all your parties and activities. What would you do in these situations?
2006-08-29 21:57:42 · 18 answers · asked by Peyman 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Their expectations would be their problem wouldn't it? If they won't be your friend anymore if you don't meet their expectations thats not someone I would call a friend in the first place. Having a friend shouldn't be like having a job, in fact it should be like NOT having a job, it should be about accepting and being accepted, there shouldn't be time or activity requirements attached to it. I've never felt the need to be 'friends' with someone so much that I would worry about it. Its also why I don't have a lot of friends, so few are genuine and so many are in it just for what they can take from you and if its not the real thing I've never been able to consider it worth having.
2006-08-29 22:03:54 · answer #1 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Everyone is different, I have friends to whom I don't talk for months at a time, but when we do it is like 10 minutes have passed. Then I have others who are much more reliant. What I have found though is that with age people become less reliant on each other (and maybe I have become less reliant on people), which is both a good and a bad thing. I suppose we just realise that when it comes to friendships they can all be broken so what is the point of putting everything into them. Just relax in the fact that your friends are around and will not go away so long as it does not get too serious. It is actually quite unfair to put too much responsibility on other people (something which I have done in the past) and they should be told.
Hope this helps!
2006-08-30 05:07:44 · answer #2 · answered by fearsome_gibbon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my experience it depends on the degree of friendship. If it's a really close friend, then surely the things you speak of should happen naturally - that's what makes that person a close friend. Other friends usually accept that you have friends who are closer to you than them, and don't expect the same degree of attention. I've always found this order just happens naturally. Obviously, even very close friends can't be involved in every aspect of your life, ie., love life, etc! If they try to muscle-in on these areas, then you need to tell them that this is a very personal part of your life that doesn't include them; if they're real friends, they will understand this.
2006-08-30 05:05:34 · answer #3 · answered by uknative 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to practice to handle situation like this diplomatically without hurting any ones feeling , like you must meet your friends with open heart , not necessary to share all the in-formations and call them regularly , explain them same life style or routine can not be carried out , rest of the life . So we have to learn to be our own also , otherwise friends are friends .
2006-08-30 05:06:51 · answer #4 · answered by your noon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A good friend shud respect yr time, and yr privacy if they cannot see that then they come across as immature and selfish, friendship or any relationship fr that matter is based on trust, compromise and understandoing and most of all space.
2006-08-30 05:05:41 · answer #5 · answered by haboba13 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the most important thing is honesty, being honest with yourself and your friends. Try not to commit to things that you cant fulfil, if the relationship changes then it is important to take the time to remind your friends how important they are to you even if you dont call them every day.
2006-08-30 05:04:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
FACE REALITY... you can't please everyone at the same time! you do no OWE your life to ANYONE! its only if you did then you can do ALL they expect of you! facing reality means accepting the fact that you can not mean up to the expectations for your friends, intimate and dear friends! also, "they" should face reality, that you're ONLY human with HUMAN limitations, so.... they should not expect you to meet up to all their expectations! they too, do not always meet up to your expectations for them, or do they??? face reality, its not all possible as humans!
2006-08-30 05:03:03 · answer #7 · answered by Kheme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friends expect alot from me. I try to fullfil all these expectations but sometimes it just doesnt seem like enough. All you can do is try as hard as you can to fullfil these expectations, but when you cant, just hope that your friends love you enough to forgive you.
2006-08-30 05:02:24 · answer #8 · answered by T-Jay 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
talk to them and tell them that you don't feel secure about their expectation and you love to be their friend. heve rules for youer self . do want is right for you.
2 point : i would leave that friendship
2006-08-30 05:07:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should be who you are and not bow down to what other people expect of you - it's hard to live other people's lives.
2006-08-30 04:59:47 · answer #10 · answered by solo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋