I've always felt emotionally attracted to women growing up. I'm 28 now. I believe I've been in love with at least 3 women in the past. However, when it comes to men, I can say they're attractive, but I don't get the same emotional connective feelings I do with women. I've never been in love with a man before. However, I have been forcing myself to date men in hopes of maybe "one day" , I'll become connected to a man. Plus, my family is religous and I hear in the back of my mind all the time that being a lesbian is wrong. My theory is that it's not fair. It's not fair to have these emotional feelings toward women and not be able to act on them without society getting wrilled up about it. What do you think I should do?
2006-08-29 18:18:04 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
To me, sexuality is based on emotions rather than a sexual matter. I do find girl / girl to be hot and sexy, but I love the attatchement closeness the best...I have had sex a couple of times with men and I honestly never liked it. It was so uncomfortable and not having an attatchment, it made it worse...
2006-08-29 18:19:54 · update #1
you are over-analyzing things way too much. exercise more if you have so much down time to think about this stuff.
2006-08-29 18:22:53 · answer #1 · answered by Dustin 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that you should talk about this with a qualified and unbiased mental health professional.
You don't have to run out and become the queen lesbian of the pride parade, but I don't think that you are happy where you are right now.
Maybe talking to someone would allow you to find a way that is right for you and a way to be happy and accept yourself for whomever you love and whatever you choose to do about that love.
2006-08-30 13:30:21 · answer #2 · answered by dani_kin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't really think that you can do anything about it. You can't change the way that our society reacts to things that are "unnatural" as some put it. I am also experiencing something like this and it's more of an emotional kind of desire like thing to kiss certain woman that im attracted too. But i also find guys to be interesting too. And like you, i also feel more connected to woman than to men. I don't know if im explaining all this very well but im trying to make sense.
2006-08-29 18:28:02 · answer #3 · answered by Brandy U 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you're right it's not fair. i hope one day people can be free to feel how they want to without being discriminated against. unfortunately, being a lesbian in today's society can be hard. it is even harder when you come from a religious family. but you need to be happy with yourself and the path you have chosen. i hear stories all the time about people who are gay, but suppress the feelings and live a very religious life. they are proud, they talk about how they have stopped themselves but they are unhappy because they are not being who they truly are.
if you feel these wonderful connections to women, run with it. just make yourself happy. i am sure your family is wonderful and while it may take them awhile, they will understand eventually. the person above is right, sometimes you just have to look out for yourself. if sex with men feels empty, then don't do it. just be happy!!
2006-08-29 18:40:44 · answer #4 · answered by . 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No, never. My existence, so far, has been in simple terms golden and comfortable crusing. The worst element i've got ever healed from grow to be the paper cuts counting money gave me. Now I carry no longer something yet plastic and my accounting team handles all surely paper. I anticipate my destiny to be in simple terms as stable because it is generally been. recently, nonetheless, i've got been pondering a wierd theory. perhaps just to break the recurring and spot if i won't be able to p.c. out with the decrease instructions my buddies and that i dare one yet another to circulate and surely devour at a soup kitchen. must be a snort.
2016-10-01 01:59:17 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my gosh, girl!!! I wish I could send you an message. Wish we could talk!!! You have no idea how much we have in common. Honestly, I felt like I was reading the story of my life in your sentences. Send me a message through Answers if you can!!! Let me just say that you're not alone and there IS happiness in being a lesbian!!!
HUGS TO YOU!!!
2006-08-30 09:33:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was once in your shoes, i've been in love with 3 women as well. I was afraid of what i am, and i never acted on it. I've only kissed one woman in my lifetime, but i've felt an emotional connection with more women than men, i've had 3 boyfriends in my life and i never really got too close to any of them. I finally came out last year on my 50th birthday and i'm happy i did. Don't wait as long as i did to make yourself happy, it's a hard journey to finding yourself, but it's well worth it. Good Luck!
2006-08-29 18:26:05 · answer #7 · answered by ~Twisted Sister~ 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If you're 28, your parents don't have any say anymore. I know you want their love and support, but if it's a conditional kind of love that's holding you back from getting on with your life, you don't need it. Furthermore, if you are strong and honest with yourself, they just might surprise you with their supportiveness.
Also, if you're dating men for any reason aside from liking them, that's cruel to them as well as you. They deserve a woman who truly likes them, as them.
You can always go to therapy and find supportive people in your community, too. Something's gotta give here.
2006-08-29 19:11:07 · answer #8 · answered by GreenEyedLilo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through exactly the same when I feel in love with my girlfriend.. I wanted to be happy,and she makes me happy so I decided to not give a hoot what society thinks as they dont care about me!
Do what makes YOU happy.. No point in living this life unhappy and with someone you dont really want to be with.
A Parents love for a child SHOULD be unconditional, it may take them time to get over, but in the end hopefully they will see that you there daughter are happy!
Look after number 1.. no one else will!!!!
2006-08-29 18:24:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well.. I think that you should accept yourself, and what you like. Dont go out with men just to see if you can be set straight, you will only hurt them and yourself, and no one's to gain.
And it's not fair, your theory's right, you should be able to love someone, not just go out with someone because society says it's the right thing to do.
And, I think it's better making love than having sex. They're not the same. Sex is just the temporary union of two bodies for the intent of personal gratification, making love is trying to make your loved one closer and satisfied, not just sexualy, but to make her feel loved, secure and cherished.
good luck!
2006-08-29 18:26:42 · answer #10 · answered by Roberto 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
it is not a sin to have these feelings and still want God..
however u might have to separate yourself for a while,, as to go with your feelings..so what.. find gay churches love God and yourself it is the commandment..and the law
as long as no one is physically hurt u are all right and don't let peopole try and control u
2006-08-29 18:50:05 · answer #11 · answered by john 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋