My situation is that I live with my girlfriend and been together for 4 years now. the thing is that my parents don't know because I have never lived with them but still at least my father is active in my life and he is very conservative, and the other thing is that I'm still studying. to put another twist to the situation my grandmother lies for me because she knows how her son is and she supports me.
I don't know what to do?
I don't want any religious stuff or anything that is not usefull please.
2006-08-29 17:27:44 · 12 answers · asked by wendy1317 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
This is hard on you we all can tell. You want to tell them to get them to accept you for who you are. Remember not all parents act the same and be ready to be strong and I'm sure if they do get upset they will most likely calm down over time. My best wishes goes out to you
2006-08-29 17:44:12 · answer #1 · answered by Super 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's really up to you. First of all, do they have anything over you? For example do they have the title to your car or is it in your name? Second, what do you want the relationship with your parents to be? Do you want to have an open, honest relationship with them or do you want to keep hiding who you are from them until they find out anyways? If you want to keep them being an active part of your life, they kinda need to know about your life. That she's just a roommate excuse will only work for so many years before they start to question the nature of that relationship. And also, what does your girlfriend think? This has become a problem for some relationships that has lead to more than couple breakups. Find out how she feels about you being in the closet so that it doesn't become a problem for you two.
2006-08-30 06:16:39 · answer #2 · answered by carora13 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're not living under their roof- 1 point for you.
You're away at college? - 1 point for you
You're already in a commited relationed. - 10 points for you
Your grandma is supporting you??/ emotionally or financially?
If you're scared to deal with his conservative reactions, ask someone from PFLAG to talk to him with you. That's what they're good at - supporting the GLBT people coming out and the families learning to deal with the news. You don't have to do it alone.Be honest and don't be afraid. (Don't tell them in a restaurant - it's embarrassing when you spill food on your lap. LOL) Hope for the best and prepare for the worst. Know that they might have a cow and not want to see you for a while. It is something they will have to deal with. You need to concentrate on being strong, studying, and being a good partner. Hopefully, with some time and maybe a little help from PFLAG, they will see that you are are still their beloved daughter. Please don't expect it to happen overnight. HUGS! (an older dyke)
2006-09-02 01:29:55 · answer #3 · answered by reme_1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wendy1317,
I really don't think that you should tell him. Not that you are hiding. But that you are independent of him. He doesn't go around telling people that he is heterosexual, does he? Why would you purposefully tell him. Do you owe him that kind of factoid? Do you also tell him when you are having your period? Should he tell you when he has erections?
I hope not. And why is your grandmother lying? Why does he ask about your sex life that's any of his buisness? If he has gone there, he may already suspect your situation. If he pressures you at all about this, get him right between the eyes with the truth. But if he is not inquiring, peace out about it why don't you?
2006-08-29 17:34:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I wouldn't mention it. I would wait it out unless the topic of "marrying a nice boy" comes up. I'm a lesbian and I never told my family. I feel it's really a personal issue and it's no one's business. I do have close friends who know , but I only told them for guidness and support...Good luck! Happy 4 years! Congrats!
2006-08-29 17:54:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to think about what exactly it is that you want out of telling your parents. If its a sense of respect of your partner and your relationship, then simply tell your parents. If they choose to not be in you life, then that's their choice and you can't control it.
If they are paying your way though, you have to decide if you are willing to give that up or not.
2006-08-29 17:40:45 · answer #6 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell them first that you don't like men. Give them time to let that sink in. Find ways to hint that you prefer women's company and then lower the boom. Or you could just try the direct approach. They'll come around eventually!
2006-08-29 17:55:08 · answer #7 · answered by Ahab 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If they don't pay the bills, go ahead and tell them.
Your grandma sounds very sweet. She'll probably help you out.
Make it very clear that it's about you being honest, not wanting to hurt them, not anything to do with them.
2006-08-29 17:34:23 · answer #8 · answered by GreenEyedLilo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your father, maybe he will understand since he is so active in your life.
2006-08-29 17:49:37 · answer #9 · answered by nick 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
there're your parents they should love you no matter who you love, i came out to my perants and was really nervous but i look back now and think what was all the fuss about...
2006-09-01 01:01:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋