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Three women in particular have always acted like they don't want to be bothered with me. They usually stand at the far left at the front of class. I just find a spot wherever. The last couple days I've been standing near the far left up front. Now they've moved to the far RIGHT - even when there's space near me and we're the same belt rank! Also, I usually practice my forms etc after class in the next room. I've asked them if they'd like to join. Now they've started practicing after class too but totally ignore me and won't ask if I want to join. I don't need to be asked. But they'll all ask each other, "Wanna practice our katas?" It's like they're ignoring me! I don't know why.

I've considered whether I smell, or have offended them. But I shower and I'm nice to them.

Could it be a race thing? I'm black/they're white. Are people still THIS petty?

2006-08-29 16:36:28 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Friends

19 answers

I don't think that its a race issue, I think that they are just snobs. Some people think that they have to have their own group of friends and they mostly like to talk bad about everyone else! Don't wast too much time worrying about them, you can find better Friend then that, just enjoy your karate

2006-09-06 15:58:53 · answer #1 · answered by aly_girl501 3 · 0 0

It could be any number of things, including racism (which is totally pathetic and stupid in this day and age, but unfortunately does exist across all lines), but I tend to believe it is the usual bitchy nonsense that women do to other women - isolation tactics. You know how deadly women can be when they are in groups - they become of one mind and will ignore or isolate someone who is not a part of their inner circle. Catch one of them alone and they may be nice to you, right? But as soon as they go back to the group, boom, they ignore you. This is typical immature crap. Think back on how it was in elementary, junior high school and high school when the cool clique made fun of, ignored, put down and were mean to the new girl in town or class, and this is the same nonsense. It could also be jealousy, honestly. Perhaps you move with more grace than they do, or you grasp the moves better. And, if it is racism? Hon, let it go. As hurtful as this is, this is their issue and not yours. If they want to behave like lower forms of life in the food chain, it is their problem. Be the class act that you are and enjoy your lessons without worrying about what they think of you. What you think of YOU is what matters, seriously.

Either way, remember this: IT IS NOT ABOUT YOU AND HAS EVERYTHING TO DO WITH THEM. Sorry for the caps, but this stuff pisses me off. My solution? IGNORE THEM. You don't need them anyway.

Be well.

2006-09-06 14:24:00 · answer #2 · answered by Sweet Pea 3 · 0 0

Really try to stay away from the "It's because I'm black" thing. Maybe they aren't sure of how to approach you...if that makes sense. A lot of times white people feel that black people don't like them, or assume because they are white that they are snobby and stuck up. Maybe they feel like you think you are better than them, by asking if they wanted to practice. You could have come of sounding like you thought you could help them be better. Just try asking again. And if they still don't' want to practice with you then find someone else in class that you can, and don't worry about it.

2006-09-05 12:57:08 · answer #3 · answered by fin 3 · 1 0

It could be a race thing because these idiots are still out there in huge numbers.I'm sure that it's frustrating but try to concentrate on why YOU are there and more of what your instructor thinks of you.If they're doing this as a group it's because they're intimidated by you in some way.There's safety in numbers and they feel empowered against you by remaining a group.Any good instructor should help you resolve this issue if you speak to him/her.If that doesn't work then either ignore it or change schools because everyone should stick together and try to help their classmates.Definitely change schools if you honestly think it's a race issue because there's no room for that kind of stupidity in the arts.

2006-09-01 00:14:14 · answer #4 · answered by joecseko 6 · 1 0

so which you haven't any longer any doubt that they are ignoring you? in keeping with risk they are intimidated by using you. Are you interior the comparable age team as they are? I took Karate for 3 years and that i stumbled on that most of the glass saved to their own age team. a sturdy Sensi might notice this and make large attempt to artwork with you or to discover you a mate to coach with. You look somewhat stricken by using this, i assume if I have been you, i might come stunning out and ask them. Preferrably one after the different. don't be nasty approximately it nevertheless. you are going to be able to desire to declare something like. "hey, i think of you're somewhat sturdy and that i might love the possibility to coach with you; Is there any clarification why we could no longer spend it slow engaged on our Katas together?" (You gave a compliment which each and every physique likes to pay attention and you asked an open ended question) She has to respond and so in return you will receive your answer.

2016-09-30 03:55:37 · answer #5 · answered by bugenhagen 4 · 0 0

Yes, the sad truth is that there's still a lot of racial discrimination in the world, but don't assume that THAT's the case here. I'm in karate myself, and I can kinda picture what you mean. I'm no expert, but try not even looking at them for a while and see if their behavior changes. No change, then continue to greet them and offer to run your katas together and practice techniques. Say, "Say, can you help me with this, or that?" If they continue to ignore you, then forget them; they're just not the right kind of friends for you. Just remember, it's THEIR OWN FAULT that they don't like you, NOT YOURS.

2006-08-29 16:43:38 · answer #6 · answered by Display Name 3 · 1 1

Maybe they're jealous of you? Usually those who act like that are jealous of you or egotistical. Maybe they're envious of your doing so well in karate. Have u been kicking some booty at those forms or sparring? Maybe they're intimidated by your skill, even if they are the same rank. Just ignore them. If they wanna act like that, then it's their loss. Just find some new friends. Have fun! I took karate for 5 yrs., so we have something in common. Good blessings!

2006-08-29 16:41:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

you would think little cliques stop when you leave school,,not so unfortunately,,they probably have reasons but ones that don't really count for much as they don't know you ,,let them alone and try to just get on with the others,,not everyone is meant to like you and sometimes it can hurt but if you keep questioning whether it is about you and not them you will drive yourself mad,,they are ignorant,,that is all.

2006-09-06 02:18:35 · answer #8 · answered by lex 5 · 0 0

Kids can be mean and very into their cliques. Sometimes this doesn't change as they grow into adults. They're probably just a nasty bunch of women. I don't see why race would be a problem, but they may think differently than me. I know its hard, but don't let them get to you.

2006-09-06 14:07:55 · answer #9 · answered by ncladams 3 · 0 0

Wow. That's weird. Maybe they're just shy around you because they don't know you very well. I'd try asking them to practice with you another time, and if they ignore you again, stop asking. They're not worth it.

2006-08-29 16:42:35 · answer #10 · answered by Darko 3 · 1 0

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