She has new hours at work that keep her there late at night and I work early so we dont see each other and I found out there is a guy at her job she thinks is hot and has been hugging him. She says he hugs her because she is having a bad day from a fight between us but does not tell me. I find out from some co workers. She did this for over two weeks and she would not tell me untill I tell her I know then she says its been 10-9 times in two weeks but I have been told its 1-2 times a day and has been there for a few months. She does not hug anyone else this much nor does she really hug anyone else? She said there is nothing going on but there is times that take her too long to close her work to come home and something could be going on. Why does she think a married person should not have to take a lie test to prove she is not unfaithfull? How do I know if she is in love with me or someone else?
Lee
2006-08-29 14:03:13 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't think she needs to take a lie detector test. I think it is pretty clear that something is going on even if it has not been taken all the way yet.
2006-08-29 14:10:13 · answer #1 · answered by lavenderroseford 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my thoughts may not win the popular vote on this question. You either TRUST or you don't, you can not love a person you can not trust. If my hubby ask me to take a test to prove I'm faithful I'D tell him a thing or two. I feel I would "not" have to PROVE anything he married me he can trust me or he can be insecure and accusing and leave. I don't grill my hubby about how long it takes him to get home, who he talks to, where, what, why, when, he dose what he dose. He is a free willed person in a marriage we both choose i do fully trust him. On the other hand most times A person suspects cheating they are right. There are "rare cases" where the other person is just to controlling to paranoid and nothing is going on. In the end you can never force someone to be truthful or faithful. When the relationship gets to the point where there is no faithfulness there are lies to cover it you need to move on. I had a 8 year relationship I knew he was cheating it took me 4 months to get proof the whole time he was YELLING it was not me I'd never do that. We even tried to stay together after i knew that only lasted about a year I could never look at him the same. So if she is cheating at some point you will know. If that's the cases you let it go.
2006-08-29 21:23:18 · answer #2 · answered by ally'smom 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey,
i know how it feels to have someone be dishonest with you and i had to learn....some one very wise told me this and since then i feel better.
Dont ask her anymore, instead get your life right
your spirtiual life..Pray make sure that GOD has your attention if your relationship with GOD is good, everything else will fall into place, weather she is unfaithful or not, it will not matter these questions will all be answered, in time. There is no private eye, lie dectector test that can out do what GOD can do for you. Go to church, listen to the word and do your thing right,you will be blessed....and she will be an after thought..let her know she is no longer a top priority in your life. That your putting God first..believe me I know it hurts when someone is unfaithful, but when you have someone on your side, the truth always comes to the light, if you need to chat, hit me up!
2006-08-29 21:54:22 · answer #3 · answered by rayjenne24 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you two are not getting along and she is being emotionally intimate with another man, which has included some physical contact, I would be suspicious, for sure. These are red flag my man!! She is discussing details of YOUR relationship with another man and hugging him. In my mind, she has already cheated, at least emotionally. She also hasn't been honest and open about the relationship she has with this other man and it sounds like she isn't accounting for her whereabouts after work until she comes home. Can you follow her, can you check her cell phone when she's sleeping??
It's hard for any of us to know what YOUR wife might be up to. But, from an objective point of view? I'd say you have good reason to be suspicious.
2006-08-29 21:32:11 · answer #4 · answered by K 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wake up and smell the coffee. She is not right. There is something definelty going on with those two. Get some concrete proof and confront her. Open up about your feelings on this matter and about what really is going on in your marriage. She is seeking something from this guy that you should be able to provide since she is married to you. Take action before its too late and get your life back in order. Good Luck.
2006-08-29 21:41:36 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously you need to make changes in your relationship that works for the 2 of you....what these changes are will depend on you both...I would suggest more 'equal' time between you, without the 'blame' thingy happening...show more trust and love towards each other...reminise...take off...take her away for a few days..maybe make it a surprise and let her boss know that she won't be available for a weekend....(but only if you think she would be happy to get away) It's something that we all have to work on...We can't automatically make someone fall in love with us, n'or stay in love with us...but what we can keep doing is proving to them that we love them no matter what while they are here with us....without any threats....best of luck to you...and take it easy man...yu have a lifetime.
2006-08-29 22:05:03 · answer #6 · answered by pea.cole 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The simple answer to this is that your marriage is in trouble. You both need to see a counselor. I don't say this because I believe that she is cheating, I say this because the trust has obviously gone out of your marriage, for good reason or not. You need to work on the trust and to clear the air between you.
2006-08-29 21:22:44 · answer #7 · answered by Magic One 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think instead of a lie detector test, you should be seeing if she would be interested in seeing a marriage counselor. Just the fact that you want her to take a lie detector test says alot in itself.
2006-08-29 21:11:59 · answer #8 · answered by Slimsmom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should take a day off from work and spy on her! Then you will know for sure and not end up making a big deal out of nothing or then you will know that she is unfaithful.
2006-08-29 21:13:38 · answer #9 · answered by mia 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Come on! You don't need a lie detector test. I don't know if she's slept with him yet or not but, something is definitely going on. Sigh. You've got problems. I don't know how to help you.
2006-08-29 21:15:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋