Have any of you new mothers-to-be had any problems with family calling to much near end of pregnancy?

Question

I am getting extremely annoyed with family and friends (people that don't normally call so much) calling and coming over literally spying to see if my vehicle is still in the driveway so they can find out when I go into labor. I have asked them all to please let this be a time for me and my husband since we were the only ones there at conception =). I'm afraid that they will try and make a grand appearance at the hospital when I'm in labor and after we bring the baby home (afraid that they will come over as they please). Please help me with what I should do in this situation as I do not wish to be bothered by everyone right now and would like to keep visitors to a minimum. Thank you. Millie

Answer 1

They taught us about this in my birthing class....it's your husband's job as your partner to sheild you and the baby from this nonsense. The family wants to share in your joy, but they should have the sense to have some understanding and respect your space...if they don't...daddy has to step in ...

"You know, Millie is very tired right now and she needs her rest...she'll call you next week"

"I have you on my delivery call list, so as soon as the big day arrives, rest assured that I'll call you with the good news"

"You know, Millie would really like to spend some alone time with the baby...plus she's really exhausted...please just give her a little time to adjust to new motherhood..."

You can also inform the hospital staff as to who is allowed in and who isn't and to wether or not you want visitors.

Just make sure that you or he is firm but polite...you never know...you may change your mind later and want a gang in the waiting room...sometimes it's helpful to have a standby just incase you're husband cracks...or on a lighter note...has to use the restroom or eat during your labor...if you have a stand in you won't have to be alone while he does the things he needs to do.

Just remember...family or not...this is an experience created for you and your husband...and it is totally within your rights to keep it for your selves. It's everyone elses duty to respect you wishes on this one, just remember not to burn any bridges or squash any toes...too badly anyway...lol

Congratulations and good luck!.

Answer 2

It gets pretty annoying because everybody is so excited that forgets they are mentally exhausting you.. You have your bad days and the question of how much longer is a mystery to you. It is not like you know when and where you are going to be in labor.. Well tell your mom you are going to mute your phone, so she doesn't get scared and that you will call her in your way to the hospital. Your husband can do the same. Tell her when it happens she can tell whomever she wants, but only immediate FAMILY MEMBERS WILL BE ALLOWED IN THE HOSPITAL. Everybody else can wait a week or 2 to come and see the baby. Don't shut them out. Let them be excited and be a part of it, but with moderation. If you want to to make it easier for you have a Welcome Home Party for the baby and everyone can see him/her and bring presents and it is not a parade everyday coming to see the baby. I Did this instead of a Shower.. It was worth it.. Good Luck and share your Joy!!

Answer 3

I haven't had that problem so much. I have caller I.d and I just let people leave messages. My family does call more than usual and they do watch my car in the driveway since I am due anyday now. I know that they just worry about me and care about me and are excited for me so even though it could be a pain I appreciate that they think of me so much. I understand though about wanting to keep visitors to a minimum if any at all. But its something I cannot avoid. I have in laws that are so excited to meet the baby they are coming from different states. They don't know that we want to be alone at a time like this but what can we do, I can't tell them no you cant come. he he. Its really nice though that I have family that cares so much. I think if it gets too much we can always hide our babies in our room and have our spouses tell them we are sleeping because it will most likely be the truth most of the time. Everyone i know who is calling or coming over just wants to be helpful too. I feel blessed to have family that cares this much.

Answer 4

i would change your answering machine or voice mail to say something like sorry we missed you, we are resting in preparation for the baby and getting the last minute things done.....we will call you when things calm down. at the hospital, let the staff know that you only want family (or who ever you want) and they will be able to turn unwanted guests away. when you return from the hospital - change your voice mail/answering machine and (i know i plan too) i am going to make a sign on the door that says mommy and the baby are resting, please do not disturb, but you can leave a message (leave a note pad out there). good luck and rest up!!

Answer 5

I would not call anyone that you did not want there while you are at the hospital in labor. The people who plan to be there should already know who they are. Others I would make a day for welcome home the baby like once the baby is 10 or so days old. So you don't have to deal with visitors everyday. After the baby comes send out a card saying please come at such and such day time to welcome home Baby. On the card write please no surprise visits we are adjusting to our new baby or something like that.

Answer 6

My daughter had a baby girl 10 weeks ago. She was getting really annoyed at the calls too. Everyone gets so excited, and just wants to know. I told her to put a message on her answering machine saying..........No baby yet, I'll let you know as soon as we go into labour. It worked nice, until she wouldn't answer my calls. LOL. People called me too when I was pregnant. It's just such a very exciting time. Appreciate it now, because after the newness wears off, you'll be lonely. Good luck, and congrats ~

Answer 7

Be careful whose toes you step on because after the baby is born, you will need your families help more often than you think. Your family wants to share in your joy. They will be grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. Their life is changing too. I understand wanting it to be only you and your husband during delivery. Keep in mind, labor can be a lot longer than delivery and your husband may need someone to stay with you so he can rest or take a break. Explain as nicely as possible the way you feel and try your best not to be selfish. This should be a joyous time for you and your family.

Answer 8

When you come home with your baby put a sign on the door stating that while you are glad that they are happy for you that you would like to have some time alone with your husband and baby for the first week. If you have voice mail and caller ID you can put a message on it daily updating everyone, and check caller ID to see who is calling

Answer 9

You need to tell them when they cal or even stop answering the phone...leave a message on teh machine that you will let them know when the baby comes. Same thing when you come home...lay doen the visitation rules. You will find that will work. When you are in teh hospital...have hubby tell them that you don't want visitors yet.

Answer 10

i was the same way with my first daughter.. Just tell them how you feel and if they come to the hospital after u have delivered and u do not want them seeing the baby then tell the nurses, they have a strict policy about that so dont worry...
good luck to you