Why do we care what society thinks of us ?

Question

I have a big scar on the side of my forehead which I have had all my life,I am now 40 and its only in the last 5 years that I have learned not to worry about people staring at it or asking if I was in a fire etc etc.
I now know that what strangers say or think about me does not matter;but wonder why we do worry about people and society and how we are viewed and perceived ?

Answer 1

I honestly don't know why we worry so much or even care what society thinks of us, we all, no matter who we are have some quirk or worry that makes each of us what we are, maybe were just reflecting our own fears of how people see us back out in to society again, I know when we were little my parents were obsessed with what the neighbours thought about anything we did, like you couldn't go back out after eating your dinner or tea for a certain amount of time in case the neighbours though you had just 'kicked the table leg' as my mom used to say, we had to wear bright white sock and black shiny shoes, just in case that offended the neighbours as well and god forbid if any of the girls in the vicinity were pregnant before they got married, that was the worst thing they could do to offend the 'what will the neighbours say' syndrome, personally I have got to the age were I now do not give a fig what anyone thinks of me, let alone the neighbours, pity you have to get to a certain age to feel like that.

Answer 2

I think it is because society judges us on our appearance - harsh but true. My husband has a skin condition called psoriasis which leaves him with unsightly patches of skin on his face, arms and hands and he has had similar issues.

I think it's good that you have got to a place where you don't worry about what people think, or if they stare. It is what is on the inside that matters, but unfortunately the first impression we make on people is usually visual, and some people can be quite rude and tactless.

I hope you continue to feel good about yourself.

Answer 3

Humans are pack animals, really... and we gather information about our fellow members using our senses: sight, sound, smell, etc. Humans have been "trained" over many years to pay attention to things that signal a person's "worth", as far as friendship or sexual reproduction, or whatever. So, though we would like to be better at "overlooking" things (for instance, scars, or obesity, or mental illness, or handicaps), we are human, and it is our NATURE to notice these things, because we have been "scoping each other out" as potential mates for years and years.

Answer 4

I think its a mating thing.....Seriously

Younger people are desperate to find a mate in order to spread their genes.
When you reach your forties, image doesn't matter so much. This is why dads dance so badly and I get my jeans ifrom Asda for £3.

When I was 20, talking to a pretty girl was a major challenge, Will she like me? reject me? punch me?

Now I will just say hello, Frankly, I don't give a damn.

Answer 5

If you feel good about yourself and have a positive effect on the environment around you then there is no reason to care.

Answer 6

i dunno. but, all i know is i'm not very old and i have a ton of scars everywhere! people ask me all the time if i have the chicken pox!!!! before it made me really self-consious but, now i don't really care because i know they're just worried about me and want me to be o.k. so it doesn't bother me anymore.

Answer 7

we care cause we have emotions and are not blind to whats around us,we may learn to deal with it but not ignore it,once you start trully ignoring things you might as well walk naked in the street