Ever since my wife had our baby...?

Question

all she does is pay attention to the baby. she basically breastfeeds the baby to sleep then goes to sleep herself. the babys only two days old and it already sucks to be a parent. what should i do so she like pays more attention to me?

Answer 1

U r being selfish. there is plenty of time for you two in the future. Just chill out she will come around i promise.

Answer 2

That's being selfish yes all the attention is on the mom and new baby but that's just how it is. I have a 6 month old and a 3 and 9 year old and that's how it was with me and my husband for a few weeks and since the baby has started teething its been that way again. But my husband is not having your feelings. My husband offers to take the older kids out so I can sleep. I am tired my baby wakes all night long since he started teething the last thing I want to do is cook or clean man half the time I don't get to shower every day. Once you wake up with the baby each time every time (not once or twice) then you can start to see what your wife is going through. Plus nursing is so relaxing that when my baby was new whenever I nursed I fell asleep with the baby. And the baby is only 2 days old she went through 40 weeks of carrying this baby and now she is in recovery she might not be sore now but she will be sore I got sore about a week after delivery where it hurt real bad to do anything and now 2 days her milk supply is going to be coming in and that hurts like hell. I mean give her a break she is tired and her body is going through a lot. I guess you have valid feelings like you are the one in postpartum but try to think about your wife and what she has been through
It gets better and enjoy being a parent you are going to love it

Answer 3

Erm, GROW UP!
You have to be the most selfish person I have ever read a question from on here. You don't deserve to be a parent and you should think yourself lucky that your wife hasn't kicked you out. If I thought for a second that my partner was coming on the internet telling the world that it 'sucks to be a parent' I'd relieve him of the responsibility and cope with a baby alone, because it sounds like he would require more care and attention than my newborn.
You need to do lots of growing up or you will find yourself without your precious family, and I hope your wife will tell you these things herself soon.
I'm glad that she is giving her time to the baby and not you. She has just been through the most pain a person can ever go through, will be feeling sore, hormonal and basically not in the mood to let you indulge in your primal urges.

If you want her to pay attention to you, go and do all the laundry, cooking, cleaning, washing up, shopping, vacuuming, change the baby's nappys, take baby for a while so your wife can have a bath and don't pester her all the time that she's in there by saying 'when are you coming out?', bath your baby etc.
But don't for a second expect her to reward you with making love to her. You'll have to wait what could be a few months for this.

Answer 4

well, I am sure you already know this, but you don't have breasts, and you can't breastfeed, therfore she has to do it. It is much healthier for the baby. Breastfeeding take a lot out of you, as well, as carring the child for 9 months that is nine, almost a year, having to go through your bodies new changes, gainig weight, sleep deprivatioin, mood swings, and all those other things. most preganat women aren't glowing like they say. Then when contractions start you are in for it. have to push the baby out of you no where, and that is rough work. even if she had a c- section, you would want someone to take a knife to you while you were awake???? would you??? you should be glad that she is such a great mom, that she is doing what is best for the baby. when that baby is asleep, it IS best that she be asleep also!!!! you don't have to wake up every single time the baby is hungary, you don't have to have a pinching on your nipple all the time. Breastfed babies feed more, so that means more pinching and pain, and more rest she needs. That is the babies comfort zone. You need to be her support, and love the baby! I hope everything works out, but for now let her give the attention to the baby!!! Congrats on the miracle!!!

take care of your WIFE & CHILD!!!!!!! CONGRATS!!!!!!

Answer 5

It's hard for everyone when the new baby gets there.All the attention for the pregnancy and the anticipation of the child build so much that its kinda a let down when the romance of the idea of being a parent wears off and 2am feeding reality hits.Shes going to be very tired for awhile.Her body is changing back to pre-pregnancy state.The baby breast feeding is a very demanding job.Unless she expresses milk into bottles for you to help with feedings you will have to be patient.My husband didn't really find this stage of being a parent fun,but now our baby is 2 and he wouldnt give up a minute with him.Just because the baby is there doesnt mean instant bonding as a father.There were just two of you a few days ago..now three.Adjust and adapt :) The rewards will worth the investment of time and energy.Congrats!

Answer 6

You need to start thinking of your wife's and child's needs ahead of your own right now. Your infant is only 2 days old. Not only has your wife been through a very physically exhausting experience, but she is meeting her child's needs while recooperating herself! She will eventually have time to divide between you two. Being a parent does not suck. It is the closest you can come to a miracle, my man. Cherish these days because that little one will grow up fast. Be there for your wife. Support her. Give her some breaks to rest and maybe she will have the energy to give you a moment. Eventually, this will not be shocking to you or your wife. Things will settle down and become more routine. You will both become accustomed to the needs of your child and each other, and your baby will adjust to life outside the womb. Be patient, attentive, and completely unconditional with your love. She needs it and so does your child. Without being there for them, you will not get what you want or need yourself. Children have to come first. It's natural. No worries.

Answer 7

You ever think that your not taking enough interest in this wonder that you helped create. What you just asked is such a machoistic question its not even funny. It sucks being a parent after two days. I lost my son at nine months before he was even born. Maybe you really need to sit back and look at what you have and rethink your situation. You just had one of the best blessings in life that you could ever have. If your wife is with the baby, then you should probably be with the baby right next to your wife. Shes obviously thrilled can you not share in her joy. Break down the tough guy no mushy stuff bull, and do what you need to do, become a father, because I didnt have one of those either.

Answer 8

Trust me, It will get so much better when the baby gets older. I practically ignored my husband when our son first came, but it wasnt anything to do with him it was just that there are some important emotional things happening between mom and baby. You know what might pull her heart strings..ask to hold the baby..ask to feed the baby (if she breastfeeds see if she will pump milk). It it totally a big adjustment becoming a new parent.

Our soon is two now and my hubby loves to rough house with him all the time. They have so much fun together and when I see my hubby play with him and take care of him, it makes me adore him more and want to snuggle close at night, if you know what I mean. Hang in there. It gets better. Newborns are alot of work and take alot out of mom. She will pay attention to you more and more everyday as the baby gets older.

Answer 9

Ur baby is only 2 days old! Stop being selfish and start by thinking about her needs. Wake up with her when she has to breastfeed, change the babys nappy, help out around the house etc. She'll appreciate it and you will know how hard it is to be a new mum and will hopefully understand why she has no time for u.

Answer 10

Your lives have changed, she's now a mom and needs to take care of a little baby, how hard is that to understand. Also, taking care of a newborn demands so much, that drs recommend that when the baby is sleeping mom should be sleeping too, she's a human person, she gets tired and just gave birth. have some consideration for her, help her out, get involved, eventually when you 2 get use to the new member in your lives she'll come around. Also she has to rest ans heal inside before having sex again, I dont know if you know it, but you have to wait at least a month. Be patient and supportive, it's only been 2 days, and there's a lot more to come.

Answer 11

I really hope you are just a bored kid trying to stir up a fight.

If not, I hope you are just sleep deprived and feeling a bit of depression that both parents feel while trying to adjust. And if not that - just stop being a selfish loser. The baby is two days old and needs all the attention he/she can get from both of you. She has chosen to breastfeed and that does take a lot of time and she will need extra help from you. Just think of how much she will appreciate your support once the adjustment period has passed. Take care of your wife and your baby - you will never regret it.