We've been dating for 5 years and the entire time I've known his family, they have been really raciest. I don't laugh at their jokes, I tend to leave the room when it gets bad. I don't feel right standing up to them, and they may make our lives a living hell if I do. They don't care for me much to Begin with (I'm to liberal for them). My bf won't stand up to them, he doesn't want to make trouble. He only makes excuses for them. Says "think of the time they grew up in," I can understand that for his grandparents, but not his parents or brothers. So, what can I do? And please be nice!
2006-08-29 08:48:26 · 10 answers · asked by Mithrandir_black 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Please take note: My bf is not raciest!
2006-08-29 08:52:29 · update #1
I would just (try to) smile and say "I'm glad you're all just joking, because I have feelings too. Besides, my friends believe that racism is nothing more than pure ignorance".
Also, ask them if they'd rather have their son treated like a king by someone of different race, or treated like crap by someone of the same. That often gets them thinking about reality.
Then leave it at that. If they don't change, it's time to find someone to treat you for who YOU are, not just based on the color of your skin.
2006-08-29 08:56:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to address this issue with your bf a little more seriously. Many times people don't realize how bad there family sitation can be.I think you should talk to him and make him realize its wrong and you aren't going to have any part in it anymore. If he puts you down then maybe its time to reconsider the relationship, becase if you two end up together you will be face to face with them all your life and It doesnt seem liek you ready to accept racism the way they have. Be smart...so what if your liberal its what makes you you..and if they hav e a problem with it then thats there issue. your bf should be more understanding and try to explain things to his family...and honestly if he can't then he isn't a man and it wont eva work because this will create further problems fo ryou in the future with him. especialyl if you get married. Take care
2006-08-29 08:53:22 · answer #2 · answered by Confused4life 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with badadvise, move on. I've seen it happen within my mothers family. Cousin married into that kind of family and when they found out(her husband included) that her parents adopted an orphaned AA baby, they wanted nothing to do with her or her family. Soon her husband became more belligerent and eventually they divorced. It was pretty hateful at the end.
2006-08-29 09:00:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i will thoroughly understand the stress you're dealing with and how it could deter you from wanting to proceed vacationing his family members. My suitable suggestion could be to communicate rapidly along with his family members somewhat than try to have your boyfriend mediate the situation using fact needless to say that hasn't been working. the subsequent time you're all on the table and you discover that they do no longer seem to be which incorporates you interior the communique by using them talking in Persian, then be well mannered and somewhat attempt to start a communique in in spite of language you comprehend each and every physique can communicate conveniently in. And if that doesn't artwork the two, basically step aside along with his dad and mom later on and gently clarify which you may pick to connect in family members discussions on the dinner table, yet can no longer as you do no longer understand Persian. basically be clean which you adore your boyfriend and his subculture and make it clean you do no longer recommend any disrespect, you basically pick to experience delicate and welcome of their residing house as you could cause them to experience. sturdy luck, I choose you 2 the suitable!
2016-09-30 03:32:01 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy sounds like he is overly attached to his family and therefore not a good candidate for a long-term relationship(*). If you must love him, at least keep your distance and remain platonic until he grows up.
2006-08-29 08:54:48 · answer #5 · answered by songkaila 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should stop being around them, when people are being prejudice they know it. And so therefore their being that way to hurt your feelings.
If you don't wanna do that you should talk to your man and explain that if it continues, you don't know were that will leave you'll b/c you shouldn't have to feel inferior when you're around them
2006-08-29 08:54:20 · answer #6 · answered by Prophisized Pearl 1908 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
IF this really bothers you then don't go of to their house.. Nothing in this world is worth compromising your beliefs!!!
2006-08-29 08:53:30 · answer #7 · answered by Not Me 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
IS THAT THE TYPE OF FAMILY YOU WOULD LIKE TO RAISE YOUR CHRILDREN IN..IS there any way you could move away from them.
2006-08-29 09:02:36 · answer #8 · answered by tysgrandma99 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would tell them that you were adopted by an african american family, that should quiet them down.
2006-08-29 08:52:02 · answer #9 · answered by hfacto 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on. The apple does not fall far from the tree.
2006-08-29 08:51:14 · answer #10 · answered by BadAdvice 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋