does anyone understand the mentality of a stalker? is it normal for men to behave like this when rejected?

Answer 1

"Normal" - no. Most people are hurt by rejection but accept it on the practical level.

One requirement for a stalker is that the man is self-centered enough to be much more aware of his own desires than of the woman's. He doesn't emotionally accept her "no" because he cannot accept emotionally that he has "failed" in what he calls "love". He is relating to an imaginary woman in his mind, not to the real one who feels attacked and vulnerable by being stalked.

Answer 2

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RE:
does anyone understand the mentality of a stalker? is it normal for men to behave like this when rejected?

Answer 3

Stalker Mentality

Answer 4

Usually stalking is a control issue -- driven by the ego/self-image being bruised in some way.

A male stalker will often feel like his masculinity or strength has been called into doubt when a woman dumps him or won't date him (i.e., he's not as strong as he thought he was)... so he will use his power aggressively to pursue her -- sometimes overtly if he feels he can do so successfully. The stalking, since it's based on displays of power, can easily decline into physical violence.

[In contrast, a female stalker will often feel like her femininity or desirability has been called into doubt when a man won't see her anymore (i.e., she's not as desirable as she thought) ... so she will harrass the man until he notices her again. Usually it tends to be more social harrassment in nature, although you will sometimes see a "Basic Instinct" case where the woman will physically assault someone.]

Most men, when rejected, either take the "ego wound" and become more passive/retreat in order to avoid being wounded again; or (more healthy) they suck it up, decide that the woman just wasn't interested in him for whatever reason, and try to find another mate.

In both cases, the ego has been wounded, but the man "accepts" the wound/pain in some way, so he can move on with life.

The stalker obviously is unable to accept the wound to his ego. Unwilling to blame himself and withdraw, and unwilling to just take the rejection and move on, he decides that the rejection never occurred. As part of that denial of reality, he has to pursue the woman and force her to respect/accept him.

This is the general psychological principle.

There can also be an "anger" issue, where the man is simply reacting and trying to inflict violence w/o thinking much about what he is doing... and sometimes a man will stalk a woman who is simply representative of another woman who made him angry in the past... but even the anger usually still stems from the pain of some woman's [perceived] rejection -- pain he is unwilling to face and/or work through in the normal way.

Answer 5

"The stalker exhibits a familiar pattern of behaviour. Stalking often starts as a result of rejection; rejection rage and abandonment rage motivate the stalker to seek revenge through a predictable pattern of stalking behavior. The stalker, usually a loner and socially inept, becomes obsessed with their target and bombards them with messages, emails, gifts, or abuse. The stalking behaviour can last for years and the intensity of abuse increases over time. The abuse, initially consisting of psychological violence, often escalates and culminates in physical violence. It's a chilling statistic which reveals that 90% of women who are murdered were stalked by their ex-partner." I highlighted this portion from an article I found, the link is below. If a guy is doing this to you, please get as far away from him as possible. It is not normal and should be taken very seriously.

Answer 6

Female stalkers are allegedly worse than male stalker. I think they feel the need to be wanted and many stalkers I understand lack love and affection from their own parents.

And no it's not normal behaviour for either male or female, to stalk someone with whom they have an infatuation for.

Answer 7

Stalking is notn normal.Most men or normal me just get over it when a lady breaks it off. A stalker is just that a stalker and it's not normal behavior.

Answer 8

Now they call it ' stalking ' - back when it was called ' torching '. Stalk implies intent to do harm. Most of these critters are harmless weepies. The broad just doesn't want to let on that she led the guy on. Til she hooks a real gorilla. Then the scenario changes dramatically. Even in a world of numbnuts, frustrated overcomes lack of performance.

Answer 9

its not normal for man or woman to behave like that. they dont even have to be rejected to be a stalker. they just take a fancy to some one and theyre off. i think that the stalker is mentally unstable.

Answer 10

No it isn't and it can be dangerous because they are obsessed. Some stalkers believe if they can't have you no one should. You need to report this to police and ask them what needs to be done to get a restraining order.