I am a divorsed mom that has remarried. My Ex has not and does not have a girlfriend that I know of. My son lives with his dad more then me because of the school he goes to. I was asked the other day how I would react if my Ex remarried and my son called her mom. Well I was just freaking out, I would be so mad if that happened. Am I wrong to think that?? I just feel that I dont get my son with me 24-7 and if some one was getting to spend more time with him and he called her mom that would just devistate me. Advice please.
2006-08-29 07:25:52 · 10 answers · asked by dbender705 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What does he call your husband?
I think if she was acting as a mom (setting the rules, punishing him, meeting with his teachers, etc.) and he wants to call her that, then she deserves the title. If she's just acting as a babysitter while you're husband does all the actual parenting over there, that's a different story.
2006-08-29 07:31:58 · answer #1 · answered by Sean J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What would be the devasting part? It seems like you care more about yourself than your son. Do you not want him to comfortable with where he lives? He knows who his mother is but he needs to do what he feels comfortable for him. If he calls her mom, thats ok, if would reassure me that he feels close enough to her to call that. My ex husband remarried a year ago. Well, she is mean and rude to my children. They have been there 2 times this year and she usually makes up some excuse to not be there. My children do not like her, even while I try to support his decision they still do not like her. I know that they will not call her mom simply because they are not comfortable with being there. They dont know her very well and they dont want to know her. So think about what your son would want to do and go from there. This is probably something that does not need to be addressed any time soon but just keep that in mind.
2006-09-02 06:26:16 · answer #2 · answered by Amy Renee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
More likely than not, it wouldn't happen to begin with. Children know who their parents are and are really uncomfortable having to call a new parent mom or dad. However, if your son is young enough and your ex does find a person that is willing to love your son and accept him as much as you do, then count it as a blessing honey. It's not a bad thing. The only way I could see it hurting, is if you weren't doing your job as a parent and out of jealousy for her doing your job.
We all think we are going to react a certain way in any given situation and although I agree that it's best to think of the worst situation so I know how to handle it, this is one of those things that rarely happens. Don't get yourself all worked up over nothing. You'll end up creating problems over a situation that doesn't even exist.
2006-08-29 07:38:41 · answer #3 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't really say whether you are right or wrong in how you feel but what I can say is that I don't think its irrational. Thinking of someone else "taking your place" has to be horrible. Just remember, YOU are his mother no one can ever change that and your son will never love a step-mother like he loves you. Also, think of it like this you would not have brought another man into your sons life if you were not sure whether he was going to be good to your son, so your ex-probably would not bring someone else into his life unless that woman was going to be good to your son. Even though you can't be with your son all the time he knows you love him try to keep that in mind and no matter who comes in his life,no one can break that kind of bond. Try to feel better.
2006-08-29 07:41:56 · answer #4 · answered by moontreefairy76 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old is your son? I think, it will ultimately be up to him. It's not uncommon for step-kids to call their step-parents "mom" or "dad" - if I were you, I would try not to worry about it, especially being that your ex's re-marrying doesn't seem like it's an immediate possiblity. Think about it, when kids grow up and marry, they often end up calling their in-laws "mom" and "dad", too; I don't think it is meant as a sign of disrespect to one's parents, but rather an honor for the parents-in-law. If a step-mother treats her step-child as her own, and the child is comfortable calling her "mom", I don't see it as a bad thing.
2006-08-29 07:44:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be hurt and upset to but children don't know about adult things like this. If your son calls her mom on his own then I would learn to live with it. There has to be a reason why he would feel comfortable to do that.
2006-08-29 09:16:28 · answer #6 · answered by queenbee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your ex remarries,I see no reason for the child to call her Mommy and then her name. Like Mommy what's her name.
2006-08-29 07:32:28 · answer #7 · answered by whataboutme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U have a good point there.......u hve all rite to feel upset. No woman most ask son else's boy/girl to call them mommy...if they do it off their own is ok...Also that other woman should always reassure that kid that she is just acting not officially his mom.
2006-08-29 07:38:54 · answer #8 · answered by Miss-Kenya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all,I am shocked to know that you have a son and you are divorced.dear you are too late to ask that question,you should have thought such things before getting divorced,afterall he is not only his son but also your too. any way it depends upon the conditions that your son will be having.
how ever now you are divorced,the best way to keep your son loving you as before, is to care alot more about him than before.
2006-08-29 08:06:38 · answer #9 · answered by virgo1982 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
your son should not be call his step-mom ,mom because he has you
2006-08-29 08:45:16 · answer #10 · answered by ladybug 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋