he's been doing this ever since we got married 1 year ago, i will give you a perfect example. Last night i went and spent 300 dollars on new bedding, pillows, sexy curtains, and a game that we can play to get in the mood. I cleaned the whole house did all the laundry,I mean everything. I had candles all over the bedroom and rose pedals leading up the stairs to the bedroom, when he got home i was waiting for him, and he walked in the bedroom and said " i have to take out the garbage", not "honey you good great", i said fine I'll wait, about 15 minutes later i heard him in the back yard braking up the old siding that was on our garage. Another 15 minutes later he came in the house. and i was lying in bed watching t.v. and he was wondering why i didn't want to do anything. I told him to get his priorities strait, i should come before the garbage!! he said he had to get it done, i told him to get up 10 minutes early tomorrow and take it out. then we got into a heated fight. HELP HELP!!!!!
2006-08-29 03:29:13 · 29 answers · asked by yamahaviper_00 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
how do i tell him how i'm feeling, he's one of these guy that i will sit down talk to but nothing sinks in!!!!, o ya and another thing everytime he want's sex i have to drop everything and go. that's why this is killing me inside, i cryed my self to sleep last night.
2006-08-29 03:31:43 · update #1
Look some guys are thicker than a brick wall and I think you have one that might be thicker.
Here you go. Tell your husband there is one chore that he has to make sure is taking care of first. That chore is you. The garbage the old siding will be there waiting after number one is taken care of. Tell him that your number one. Don't want him not to understand that part. Again garbage and other chores will be there after but you might not be. Then tell him to think about it and have him repeat what you said. If he doesn't get it explain again.
Good Luck
2006-08-29 04:32:02 · answer #1 · answered by Mit 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yeah I would be bothered about that too. Under those circumstances, that garbage would have been waiting on me. I can't see how you got into such a big fight. Any guy that knows anything about women at all (especially the one he is married to) should know that your feeling would have been hurt by that. In any case, I think he purposely avoided the sex that night. I'd have a serious talk about if he is bored with your sex life or what. And also, if you haven't already, I'd talk to him about your desire for him to be more spontaneous and attentive.
2006-08-29 03:37:38 · answer #2 · answered by Chris D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit him down and let him know how you feel. Ask him why he's doing this. If things don't improve, next time he expects you to stop what you're doing for sex, give him a taste of his own medicine and just say "sorry, I have to do the dishes" or something to that effect. It might be the only way for him to realize how you feel.
You need to fix this problem. Look on the bright side though, it doesn't seem like you need to pester him to do his chores....
2006-08-29 03:48:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
there has to be some reason why he isn't in the mood and if you can't talk, or he won't open up then there really isn't much to do but....live with it........or not.
If he isn't willing to open up to you about why he is like that, then maybe he needs a little bit of shock treatment. Tell him you're leaving because he can't open up to you. Marriage will not work without having the ability to at least talk about these things. There has to be a reason why he is ignoring your advances.
It's hard I know but the main thing you need in a relationship is communication.
2006-08-29 03:41:04 · answer #4 · answered by rdhedhottie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some men dont have as many hormones. FIREsign men Pisces and Tauruses will remain interested for Many years. I feel for you. The first time I had a boring man. Is he having trouble performing? If it isnt good he will get more nervous. My 1st husband kept calling me abnormal when it was really him. Finally I fell for someone else. Ask him what is wrong if you dont know. Age can determine how often for some people.
2006-08-29 03:42:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When he came in the bedroom or just when he came in, I would have thrown him on the bed and went at it before he could say anything dumb like that. If I had did all that getting ready 4 him, he would have dropped everything and enjoyed time with me. That is just so wrong.
2006-08-29 03:48:22 · answer #6 · answered by **What??** 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My heart goes out to you, there aren't many women that would go to such an extent to please their husband. You are an extreme romantic and I'm afraid your husband is totally on the opposite side. You stated that when he's in the mood you have to drop everything.....don't.....let him see how it feels to be rejected and maybe he'll be more responsive the next time you line the stairs with rose pedals.
2006-08-29 03:36:03 · answer #7 · answered by hummingbird 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he has a fear of intimacy. It's a problem for a shrink or a good marriage counselor.
It's not something that can be fixed by talking to him about it.
That will only lead to more fighting.
If it's a winky problem you would be aware of it. He would have let you down a couple of times before he started avoiding it.
2006-08-29 03:45:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have married me. I do everything you do, and I get NOTHING sexually. I cook, clean, fix everything, do the yard work. Compliment my woman, support her every choice and all I want in return is some fun in the sheets. I am a very sexual person and there are women out there missing out on this man, because I am married to her.
2006-08-29 04:05:53 · answer #9 · answered by bassmanjohanson 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in a similar situation, however I am the male and my wife is the one that does not get it straight.
Could be a medical issue (getting it up?) or could be he may need time to unwind once he gets home (not ready for sexual relations at that time...) But the real issue is that you two need to talk about it, even if it is with a third party (marriage counselor)
Good luck.
2006-08-29 03:47:27 · answer #10 · answered by g m 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋