My daughters have a friend who lives in a house that is very dirty. The house has such an odor from animals.?

Question

here's the scenario: When you open the door it's very nauseating. They have about 4-5 dogs and probably 8-10 cats ALL IN THE HOUSE! The Mom drinks a lot. The Mom allows a 21-yr old friend to come and play! (a boy).

I'v stopped allowing my girls to go over and play there. I don't mind if the girl comes to my house to play. It's not her fault.

Am I being over cautious? I worry about bacteria!

Answer 1

I can't let my daughter visit her half-sister for the same reason. We try to go get her from time to time so she can spend time with us, but even that is dificult since she sometimes brings fleas with her and we end up having to use a fogger after she leaves.
No, you are not being overly cautious. Sometimes life isn't fair and the kids need to learn that early but also learn how to deal with people who are different with love. Sounds like you are doing a great job.

Answer 2

You do not state the age of your daughter and her friend so can't really judge the appropriateness of the 21yr old. You are not wrong to not let your daughter go over to this house But if you wish to make a difference in this girl's life you may subtly and with tact -there are books,Dvd's and so forth that educate on animal care and then perhaps have your daughter-provide housetask gloves and the masks agaainst pollen,dirt,dust that can be bought in any drugstore and so on and cleaning supplies and perhaps some litter(cat) clean the house(day and the hours to do this set by you and when the time of the cleaning is over she is to come home -perhaps invite the girls then also for dinner.) You do not mention a father aat this house-perhaps the Mother is overwhelmed and maybe she'd like a friend -you can make a neighborly gesture and whether or not depends on how you're received. I certainly wouldn't call child services for beside dirt etc and the momma drinking you do not mention any abuse or neglect issues(these would be justifiable reasons to get Child Social Services involved)Just because there is a problem with cleaning ,animal care etc doesn't necessarily mean that there isn't Love. You may eventually consider esp if animals not fixed/neutered for then there'll be a serious probl for the animals. calling the Humane Society or the ASPCA for they will assess the animal and relevant hygiene issues and act accordingly while the Pound will simply come get the animals and destroy them. Perhaps what I'm suggesting is a bit much for you're already showing a good heart by letting the girl come to your house but by going that extra mile then perhaps the girl will learn proper animal care and hygiene for in this situation the animals really need much better care and she may also grow up to be a good responsible pet owner and a decent human being always remembering your effort and kindness in her behalsf. Its also commendable that your daughters have a friendship with this girl for a lot would snub her. More than likely this friendship also means the world to this girl. Good Luck and blessings on you and your daughters as well as prayers esp for the little girl and her mother.

Answer 3

I don't think that bacteria is the thing to worry about here. I think that you need to be more concerned about the 21 year old boy and the mother's drinking problem. A child will encounter just as much bacteria in school as at a house with numerous animals.

Answer 4

Someone has to step forward and call Child Protective Service if this girl is younger than 18. All those animals in the house? Of course it would smell bad.

Answer 5

you are doing a good thing because if she drink what would it be if her kids start by just watching there mom and the 21

what to know they might even have drugs you are just protecting your kids yea allow the kid to go to your house she might even come around knowing drinking is not for them

i was brought up in a house w/drinkers its no fun i was forturant i had people looking out for me it is very sad my parents didnt do drugs though but know days u can never know by just looking at people
wtg keep your kids safe
i was 5 yrs old doing dishes and watching my brother and sister its hard but my friends parents showed me that i could be a better person its hard on kids

Answer 6

You're doing what a concerned parent would do. Call social services or even report it to the school.... when you have the little girl over, offer her the shower so she can feel good about her cleaniness. Hard to say how her hygiene is with living conditions like that.

Answer 7

First by having so many animals it is not only illegally but bad for your daugthers,the 21 yearold is playing with the mom not the daugther right.If he is call social services,heck call them anyway this poor girl is being subjected to an acoholic mother and a bad one.

Answer 8

Um. I'm not sure how to say this.
I'm nineteen, and have a very over protective mother, or just am viewing things the way any other teenager would. They might be quite angry with you, and might view you as over bearing, but if you're just trying to protect them, then you might just want to explain that to them. As for being over cautious, aren't all mothers?

Answer 9

If you don't feel comfortable with your daughters going there, of course you should forbid it. I don't think it is a matter for the authorities however. These people have different standards of cleanliness to you; it doesn't mean they are bad parents or even that it is a bad environment. Your concerns about bacteria are groundless.

Answer 10

I wouldn't be so concerned about the animals unless they are suffering somehow. But, the drinking problem is something to be worried about. You're doing the right thing. Keep your daughters away from there.