How do I not let embarrassing things keep me from sleeping?

Question

Whenever I can't fall asleep at night, I usually think about the worst moments of my life. Today was the most embarrassing day of my year. I tripped while walking on the bus afterschool, and I asked my friend if my boyfriend saw, and my friend said he did, which was even more embarrassing, and all the kids on the back were laughing. Also, I get nervous easily and I get embarrassed around big groups and when I'm talking in front of a lot of people. I am so sick of getting embarrassed, because ever since what happened today, I don't think I will be able to fall asleep. It usually takes me awhile to be completely recovered from an embarrassing sitaution, but I don't want this one small moment from today to ruin my thinking and concentration. How do I get it out of my head, because it happened at 3:00 this afternoon and it won't go away no matter how hard I try not to think about it. I really need help badly.

Answer 1

Embarrassment...awful feeling, isn't it? Yet, there is no way to avoid it and there won't be in your entire life. You can be 15 or 30 or 60 or even 90 and still embarrassing things will happen to you.

Embarrassment is worse when you take yourself too seriously. Look at it from the other side...if you see somebody trip and his books go flying and he performs acrobatics to maintain balance and in the end stays upright, then smilingly bends over to pick up all his books and splits his pants - that's funny - but no so much for him. He has a choice to be good natured and laugh with everyone or to run away mad and teary.

You have choices. You tripped on the bus. It made you feel badly. Tomorrow, you may drop you purse and have everything spill all over the ground. The next day someone may bump your arm while you're putting on lipstick and smear it all over your chin, the next day you can drop your tray in the cafeteria...and on it goes. Think about all the things that can go wrong but don't. You tripped but did not fall on your face or break a bone.

Try to remember that things can always be worse - work out scenerios in your head and try to decide how you'll handle things. If you can face whatever happens with humor, you'll sleep better.

Meanwhile, lay quietly in your bed, turn off the lights and TV, and start counting backwards from 100...I don't remember ever getting down to 1 because I bore myself to sleep.

Answer 2

You really do seem to have a problem. I think most people have something happen, that they wish hadn't, almost daily. If I where you, I'd try to stop thinking about embarrassing moments and spend more time thinking about better, happier, times. Just from what you wrote I know that you have a boyfriend, who probably doesn't care if you trip or not. You also have a friend good enough to ask about it and get the truth. Who knows what the people in the back of the bus where laughing at. If it Was you, well ,at least you're popular. So try to put things into perspective and get some sleep.

Answer 3

Embarrassment sucks when you are younger. It certainly seems like the only thing that matters and the end of the world - "Oh my Gosh!"... but truly - it's a part of life. It will happen again, again, and again... The good news is as you get older and face tougher challenges you will realize that embarrassing moments are really an opportunity to laugh at yourself. If I were you, instead you worrying about it, have a good laugh. We are all human and we all do embarrassing things. It won't end when you get older, but it will become a great story that you will tell to the people in your life because they weren't there to see it and you want to make them laugh. It will become something that others will appreciate - something that others will find amusing when remembering their own embarrassing mishaps. :)

The more embarrassing it is to you - the more you can make someone else laugh when you tell the great story of your embarrassing moment!

Best Wishes,
Genie

Answer 4

I feel for you, I really do.

Have you ever heard about the book called 'Don't sweat the small stuff?' I would suggest reading it, because really, it's all small stuff.
Time heals everything. Embarrassment is only an emotional reaction, just like crying, laughing, and other emotions.
Trust me - in a few weeks you won't even remember this little accident. We all trip up in life; even your heroes.

When you sleep tonight think about the best place ever, like a wonderful valley with flowers and a lake to swim in, or a beach and an ocean, and picture yourself there, relaxing, watching the birds and listening to the sounds of nature. You'll fall asleep and have good dreams.
Always go there when you find yourself thinking too much about the small stuff.
Take care,
Betta

Answer 5

This can indeed cause problems, especially if your self-esteem is weak. Try this: When you lay down, do so on your back. Stretch your legs and arms by trying to touch the walls away from your bed by making your limbs longer. Then relax just your toes. Then your feet, one at a time. Slowly relax your legs, then your arms, from the extremities to the body. Then relax your torso, neck and face. Still awake? Inhale slowly through your nose while counting to eight. Hold for four heart beats. Release through your mouth for another slow eight count. Repeat for twenty-five repetitions. If you can do all that, and still be thinking about what bad things happened, you have a VERY exceptional brain. All those tasks should drive the distractions away. Good luck!

Answer 6

This is why being a teen is so hard. When you mature you won't think much about what others thought when they saw you trip, and they won't pay much attention, either.

i wish I could send everyone like you the $60 videos on www.emofree.com

The manual is free. The problem is knowing how hard to tap and how often.

EFT is sort of like acupuncture but no needles, just tapping. Vets who have had PTSD for decades have been cured in one day.

My son had problems with it, because he didn't have the video for a long time. I just asked him, and he said you have to tap around 3 times a second, and fairly hard, but please be careful if you bruise easily.

The sequence is complex, but he says it really works great if you have only one problem to work on.

And, if you can figure it out with the free manual, it's free and will be a useful skill the rest of your life.

Answer 7

I use to have the same problem, thinking about all the little stuff that ruined my day. But I soon realized that if anyone else remembered that you tripped on the bus and that was the highlight of their life, then just tell them to get a hobby or something. And keep this in mind. Don't let one bad day ruin the rest of the week. Tomorrow is a new day.

Answer 8

Set mental boundaries. Discipline your mind. This will sound silly, but you can make yourself a sign that says, "No worrying after 9 p.m." and put it on your bedroom wall. Internalize this as a rule...at a certain time, the worrying has to stop. After mentally cutting the worrying off at a consistent time, you will find that you automatically stop.

Also, take an hour to relax and unwind. Take a hot bath, have some chamomile tea, and read for a while. It will take the edge off the anxiety and give your mind something else to think about.

Answer 9

My mother, bless her heart, always went right to sleep when she went to bed. I asked her how she did it and she said "When my head hits the pillow, that day is over....gone, what happened that day is over and done with. I don't worry about it or think about it".

"Yesterday is gone, today is the present, tomorrow may never come". Laugh and the world laughs with you.....cry and the world still laughs at you. Take it in stride....forget it. Hey, we ALL have fellen down.....and the older you get...the more they add up. Nervous around people? Know what you are talking about and spit it out. Pops

Answer 10

No one is perfect and no one likes anyone who tries to be. There is nothing wrong with making people laugh. You may have brightened someones day. I remember a saying that went "a person that enjoys happiness without producing it is like a thief that steels wealth without producing it".
Everyone likes a person that is warm, approachable, and human. Smile you probably made many friends today.