what do you say to your friend whos grieving for someone who commited suicide?

Question

My friend has just learned one of her close buddies hung himself, what do I say to her? I dont know the person who died.

Answer 1

oh geez. that's a tough one. There's nothing really you can say. Just be a shoulder for her to cry on if needed. I think the most important thing is to not treat her with kid gloves. She's going to need you to be the same person you've always been. There's a lot of really tough things going through her head right now - worrying about other people treating her differently is just going to make it that much harder to deal with. Everyone deals with death and suicide differently, but, in my experience, I hated it when people said something like, "I didn't want to bother you - I know my problems are nothing compared to yours."

Answer 2

You are such a good friend to ask this question.
First off, call or visit her. Tell her how very sorry you are that she lost a friend. Let her know you are there for her, then be there. She may want to go places and need you to be there, or she may just need to sit and be quiet with you there. Learn about the stages of grief, you can ask a librarian for a book on it. If you think it will help your friend, share it with her. I don't know her, but some people try to blame themselves for not being there to help. They think they could have stopped the suicide. Remind her that people who do this have been very unhappy for a very long time. They could have gotten help if they needed it, but chose a different path. No one can stop someone from doing something they want to do. I hope this helps you. Good luck.

Answer 3

My client's husband just killed himself and the only thing I could do was be there for her, listen and encourage her.

After some time, (A few weeks) when I knew she had the logistics taken care of, I bought her some spa products; Soak, lotion and oil along with a relaxing candle for some quiet time.

My note did not mention anything about the circumstances, but that I thought she might like some rest and relaxation time for herself. She was thrilled.

Everyone grieves differently, so it is very important to not impose your idea of grief on the other person. Be still and follow their lead. They will, without words even, tell you what they need from you.

Answer 4

please ignore people who left you stupid answers. How insensitive.
Sometimes there are no words that can help. Let the person talk, if they want. Sometimes they just need someone to listen to how they are feeling. If they don't want to talk, just do something nice for them something you know they would like, the grieving process is important let them grieve of course. As long as you are a friend and they know that you are there, you have done a great job.

Answer 5

I think you need to be there and talk about the fact that life is special and while this person ended their live - you need to live on with their memory in your hearts. I think this is a tragic situation for a family and their friends to face. The death becomes a self blaming situation - where people ask themselves if they could have done more. The hurt is not something easy to pass. Important is not to feel you are alone. You all need to tell each other that you are there for each other. There is a bond.

Answer 6

Just be there to offer comfort and support. You don't have to feel obligated to talk in detail about the life lost. Be willing to go with them to counseling your support groups for suicide. Like you stated, you don't know the person that committed suicide. You really aren't in a position to say much about him except that he was important to her. Listen to her and answer her as best as you can with a caring heart even if the answer is "I don't know."

Answer 7

i'm sorry that you lost your chum. My ideas flow out to you. Grieving over your chum will take see you later because it takes. there is not any prescribed time. anybody could grieve in his/her own time and also you aren't any diverse. i'm sorry that you're dealing with this. in case you sense that you're unable to end crying and to imagine about different issues, I advise you ask for help from a relied on counsellor. you'd be having situation coping with more effective than her lack of existence.

Answer 8

I say I understand how sad she is of the demise of her friend and I can imagine how desperate the one who has committed the suicide must have been. He/she has chosen this solution to his/her problems. We should respect his/her decision and just hope this is the real end for the bad times he/she has had in the world.

Answer 9

Make sure that she is not so depressed that she will copycat this other person's act.

Death is always difficult to deal with, but when it is sudden and unexpected, than it is even harder for people to accept.

Be supportive, and let her know that you will be available to be her shoulder to cry on. Let her talk about it when she is ready, but dont force her if she is not ready to.

Answer 10

just tell her that he did that for a reason and wouldnt have done it reasonless, tell her that he now has escaped whatever pushed him to do this. she will meet up with him in the afterlife. or find a friend with a new baby, at it might be him, reincarnated, or an animal, depending on what she believes