I am 25 and my husband is 28. We have been married almost 2 years. People forever ask us when we will have a baby and to be honest, as much as we both love kids we just keep saying "when the time is right".
But then I think about all the plans we have - we are saving for our first home and want to do some more travel. Will there ever be a "right time"?
When did you and your partner make the decision that it was the right time for you?
By the way people asking me this doesn't annoy me - I am guilty of asking the same question to my married friends at times! It just has made me look at our life to try and figure out what that "right time" will be for us
2006-08-28 12:42:42 · 10 answers · asked by kimberhill 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Whenever you are financially and physically ready to have one. You don't have to have one just because people want you to. It is all up to when you two can completely financially, physically, and mentally have one. Babies are alot of work and take alot out of you, they need lots of love and attention. I am sure when ever you do get pregnant you will be ready.
2006-08-28 12:46:21 · answer #1 · answered by Common Sense 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, I don't feel there ever is a right time. You just make it the right time. I think if you want to travel somewhere, go. Maybe you can make a baby while you are there. I got pregnant by accident, with a completely incompetent man when I was 23. I had to move back in with my parents because I couldn't afford it. But you know what, I wouldn't change anything. My son is my world. I am trying to get pregnant again. I had a miscarriage two months ago, which was devastating. But I'm not giving up. We are just buying our first house so even though we are broke, it just feels right. Just go with how you feel and what your heart tells you to do. Some people aren't meant to have kids. But if you feel like you want them, go ahead. Don't wait so long that you turn around and you're almost 35 and haven't started. Because you might want more after that one, and the risk for complications goes up. Hope this helps.
2006-08-28 12:53:03 · answer #2 · answered by Good Gushy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you feel is the right time. It never matters what anyone else says or thinks. I have 4 boys 1-10yrs and I have lost 2 other children and I am constantly asked if they are all mine, are you gonig to try for a girl. I sometimes tell them "my husband got fixed" they leave me alone. I was 20 adn my husband was 24 when we got married and I was 21 when are first child came along, 29 for my last. Take the time to really get to know each other, my hubby and are still are learning new things abount each other, you always will. Anyway;;;I know how annoying the same question can be. Stick to your ground and good luck to the both of you when you do start your family, kids are wonderful.
2006-08-28 12:52:39 · answer #3 · answered by browneyedgal 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The notion of a "right time" for a baby is a complete myth. There is never a right time. You could always have more money, you could always have a bigger, nicer house, you could always do more travelling, etc. The list is never-ending!
Just wait until both of you agree that you want a baby, and then start trying. Don't plan it years ahead. You can't plan a family with military precision. Try as you might, but mother nature will always prevail. There will always be surprises.
My husband and I had our first accidentally. Now, we just say, when we get pregnant, we'll get pregnant, and that's it. We let nature decide when we'll have our next kid. There's never a right time for a baby. A baby disrupts everything, no matter how perfect you think you planned everything.
2006-08-28 12:47:40 · answer #4 · answered by Guppy Geek 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's 100% ok to not want kids either, don't let others pressure you into thinking that a few years of bliss (baby/kid) is worth years of hell and $$$$ (teenager/20 something and even beyond)
Who knows, you might have the next great world leader...or another Jeffery Dahmer. Are you willing to risk it? Not I...I play with my nieces and nephews, and when I'm done they go home.
Selfish? Maybe...Honest? You bet.
Nothing like waking up when YOU want to. Going to where YOU want too and spending money on you and your spouse. Add a kid to equation and life isn't as free any more...and it only gets worse the older they get.
How many times have you seen this happen to those around you???? Be honest....Now you know why your parents are nuts! =)
But if you do happen to still want a kid, I send my condolences in advance.
2006-08-28 12:59:54 · answer #5 · answered by joe b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
whenever you feel the right time is. for me, i needed the baby to help me settle down. if you still have things that you want to do before children, so them. serious traveling is almost out of the question, it's an adventure just going to wal-mart with my 10 month old.
2006-08-28 12:45:58 · answer #6 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have at least one job between you that is stable, and you have health insurance, and can afford to pay the deductibles and coinsurance after the insurance pays... then I'd say you are ready. Many people have said, "If you wait until you can afford children, you will never have them." I believe that's true. But these days, it really makes sense to wait until you have enough money to pay the bills, or health insurance.
2006-08-28 12:49:44 · answer #7 · answered by mia2kl2002 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only have a baby when you both agree your ready.ask yourself....am i really ready to give up drinking or smoking? or what ever you do.If your ready to be pregnant for 9 months?You'll know when your ready.but don't do it if you think it's what your suposed to do.You do what you think is right.
2006-08-28 12:50:11 · answer #8 · answered by Cutie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When the Dr said congratulations.
2006-08-28 12:46:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When the time is right.
You nailed it the first time.
You will know when the time is right.
Stop worrying about it.
2006-08-28 12:50:53 · answer #10 · answered by Alan Turing 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋