If my parents are going through hard times (breakup) and when they ask me whos right, and make me pick sides (im 14)
2006-08-28 12:03:41 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I got that problem too. Be strong
2006-08-28 12:10:39 · answer #1 · answered by ricco_0101 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is sad that your parents, two grown adults would put there child in the middle of there problems. That is just so wrong. If I were you I think I remind them that you are a child. There child and you shouldn't have to pick sides. I would tell them they need to work through there own problems. I would also make sure they UNDERSTAND that this is hard on you to and they should be trying to make this as easy as they can.
2006-08-28 19:15:13 · answer #2 · answered by browneyegirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is always tough, the most mature thing to do though is telling your parents that THEY are being immature by making you pick sides. tell them you love them both and then if they start screaming on how you could possibly like the other parent then just say, "I am sorry you two cant see the good things in each other" then walk away. Hopefully your parents will soon start acting like adults soon. But sometimes parents are meant to be apart, so dont be upset if they do. It can be better, trust me, mine are divorced too!!!!
2006-08-28 19:08:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is so not right of your parents to put you in the middle of their break up. I can't stand it when adults do that to their kids. I think that messes a person up more than anything. Tell your parents that you love them both, but this is their fight...not yours, and to leave you out of it. Tell them you don't want to play tug of war with their feelings or with your own. They are both trying to get to you so that the other one may get hurt with your response.
I know it's hard, but you can't get in the middle of this. I'm sure it's already pretty rough on you as it is, why should you subject yourself to those questions.
Good luck, sweetie. I hope all will turn out well for you.
2006-08-28 19:10:06 · answer #4 · answered by Fuzzy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been in that same situation. My mother and my stepfather got a divorce and my stepfather always wanted me to side with him. The best advice I have to give is this: You have to stay strong and think before you speak on what is right and wrong. If you do not want to answer the questions they ask, just let them know you do not feel comfortable choosing sides because you do not want to make them angry at you.
2006-08-28 19:08:25 · answer #5 · answered by dkelli 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just a minute. they ask you to take sides? that's absolutely not right. i would tell them both that very thing. if your parents don't have the guts to work thru their problems, then they should part. but you should not be made to feel like it's your fault or for you to pick a side! do you have other relatives near by that you can count on? you can count on me being there if need be.
2006-08-28 19:09:30 · answer #6 · answered by Alterfemego 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your parents don't have the right to get you involved in their messups. Tell them to mature "gow up" and to stop and think about their children, not about themselves.
It gets me angry knowing that there ar parents with so much selfish tey don know howmuch they hurt their children.
However, that's a problem between them two, I am sure that they love you very much but they don't realize how much their problems affect their children. I am sure you love both of your parents, let the Courts decide.
I hope with all my heart you don't have to go through this for too long.
God Bless you.
2006-08-28 19:15:28 · answer #7 · answered by Mother of three 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they should not make you pick sides,,,thats not fair to you. i think they should know better then that. but im sure they are caught up in thierselves right now,,not thinking of how you are feeling.,....sit down with them and tell them you are not picking sides. if they ask you this again just ignore the question and walk away and keep walking away until they get the hint...its not fair to you at all.... good luck
2006-08-28 19:07:59 · answer #8 · answered by michelle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your parents that you love them both and that their marriage and troubles are just theirs. A marriage is between a man and woman, not their children, parents, siblings, or friends. Your parents should not put so much pressure on you. Also tell them sometimes he's right and sometimes she is but they should talk it over between the two of them or a minister or family therapist, NOT YOU!
2006-08-28 19:22:21 · answer #9 · answered by roncarolhillsstupid 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do is not to take sides, just enjoy the parent you're with at the moment and let them know you love them.
2006-08-28 19:07:17 · answer #10 · answered by likris 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Parents only focus on themselves at this time. They don't see how it affects the children.
Do Not Take Sides! But Be truthful.
What you can do is encourage them to seek marriage counseling through their Church. Encourage them not to give up. Remind them that you are their child, not their pond. Let them know how it is affecting you.
Ask them whatever happened to the marriage vows they took?? Did they not mean anything!
Let them know that "divorce" is not of God, it is man's creation to destroy families!
2006-08-28 19:21:46 · answer #11 · answered by SAM 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋