2006-08-28 09:18:08 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am not cheating on my wife. We are still together, and I still love her but not in love.
2006-08-28 09:31:05 · update #1
Stick to your words and commitments. Love is more than feelings. Focus on the good things about your wife that drew you to her in the first place. If she pushes you away a little bit, it might be because she has felt you withdraw your love from her and is hurt. Woo her back, and be a man of your word.
2006-08-28 09:22:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You made a lifelong committment to your wife in front of families, friends, and God. It said for better or worse, sickness, health, plenty and in want, something like that. Anyway, the point is that we all fall in and out of love with our spouse. I love my wife, always have but there were some periods when I did not feel in love. This other woman clouds the picture. You are feeling that newness, infatuated love. I think you should forget about that other woman for now and work on your marriage. Do couseling, do novel things together, take a nice romantic trip togethers, do lots of talking to ignite the marriage again. Do not give up? If you are weak and keep this other woman in your life, you will commit adulterty and then you have violated your marriage vows and might as well divorce. However, a marriage in which the flame has dimmed can not compete with that "new love" feeling. Comparing the two is unfair and not wise. Cut off the woman on the side and focus on the commitment that you already have.
2006-08-28 17:07:12 · answer #2 · answered by Confused 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SLAP YOUR FACE, SNAP YOUR A** OUT OF IT, AND GET OVER IT!!! You chose your wife, and you loved something about her when you met her. You need to find out what that was and get it back. We always think that divorce is the answer, but all it is, is an excuse to not face the fact that you and your spouse are failing each other, and you or both of you are too damn lazy to try and straighten things out, and that is what's happening. Leave the other woman alone. If you have kids, then think about the children. I am not saying that you should stay married for the kids, but understand that no matter what the reasons are that mommy and daddy are not together any more, the children are scarred. It is selfish to completely think that the children are EVER benefited by divorce.
2006-08-29 00:14:53 · answer #3 · answered by savvyd 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't say in your question if you love your wife... that's important to note. If you do love your wife and are happy with your life together, you would really be better off stopping all communication with the other woman and focusing on your marriage. If you do not love your wife, you owe her the opportunity to find a life with someone who does and should end the marriage. I would not suggest telling her about your love for another but tell her the truth, you are not in love with her.
Good luck.
2006-08-28 16:26:26 · answer #4 · answered by LovingMichael 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long have you been married? I am just curious.
You owe it to your marriage and the vows that you took to work it out with your wife. At least try and figure out how you were able to be in a position to love another women even though you are married. If you honestly feel as though you gave it your all and you honestly tried to work things out with your wife and rekindle what was lost and you still are not able to save the marriage, then I would say go forward with a divorce and be with the person who you truly love. You have to ask yourself though: Is it worth it?
2006-08-28 16:29:29 · answer #5 · answered by lb83 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well Todd...here's another fine mess you've gotten yourself into! SO what are you going to do about it? You have to conditions you have to define though.
One. DO you have children. If yes then you stick around. Besides you would go broke paying all of the child support and dividing up all of the maritial assets.
Two. You have no children. Then be as gentle as possible but dump your wife and run off with the new girl. But you might find out that having is not nearly as much fun as wanting.
Check out the following web site. It can answer you questions better than I can.
http://www.condomsbrasandstraightjackets.com/
Good Luck
2006-08-28 16:27:28 · answer #6 · answered by hoyhoydc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure your in love with the other women or is just lust? Best to make sure before you make a huge mistake in your life. If you love your wife like you say, you can rekindle the "in love" with her. Communicate, compromise, talk, talk and talk. Don't give up so easy. You married her for better or worse. You could very well fall back "in love" with your wife, it there was not another women....
2006-08-28 17:57:54 · answer #7 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have children with your wife, get serious about being a man, husband and father. Quit thinking with your little head, the grass is NOT greener on the other side of the fence. You will wind up thinking and doing the same thing until you change your attitude about your current situation.
2006-08-28 16:54:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you 100% positive you love this other woman? If you are i suggest telling your wife now before she finds out on her own. I am positive she will be hurt and feel betrayed but if she finds out on her own it will be worse. Sit down just you and her no distractions and tell her. Answer all her questions honestly. Be as senstive as possible yet be ready for a verbal assualt on her part. If my husband were to tell me this i would have many many not nice words to say.
2006-08-28 16:24:00 · answer #9 · answered by kelene 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You either stay in your marriage and work it out with your wife or you get divorced. You can't have both. Be forewarned though, when you get into the "new" relationship, it may not be what you had initially expected, then you would've thrown away your marriage for nothing.
2006-08-28 16:30:05 · answer #10 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋