She use to 'mess around' with this guy (and almost had a kid together)a long time ago. Now she is with someone she truly loves. But on occasion that guy will text her just to say hi and see how she is. She always texts back. I keep telling her she needs to leave that guy alone and move on. She has it amazing with this new guy...why have the chance of ruining something good!? Am I right or is she right? If not or so, why what is your opinion?
2006-08-28 08:53:57 · 14 answers · asked by MsLysa 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
She should never do anything behind her new guy's back it brings distrust and arguments. If the person is just a friend then she should talk it over with her man she really loves. He might feel secure enough in there relationship to let the friendship go on.
But if she has left over feelings for this other guy she might just want to completely get him out of her life because she might fall into the same routine and give in to temptation. They don't realize that the feeling they are holding on to are just memories.
But if she truly loves the guy she is with now she should look to the future not the past.
2006-08-28 09:10:44 · answer #1 · answered by eve 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had the same problem, I dated a guy on and off for a few years and then when we finally ended it for good, I still talked to him too much and he was the first person I ever told any news to- good or bad. I never allowed myself to be happy in any relationship other than the so called happiness I thought I had with him. I have not talked to him in a couple years now and I am happier than I ever imagined being when I was with him. It is hard to let go, but in the end it was the best thing I ever did for myself.
2006-08-28 08:59:29 · answer #2 · answered by Angie A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if they keep texting & nothing else, if shouldn't be a problem. It sounds like they're just friends. It doesn't sound like the guy she's with now doesn't have a problem with it or doesn't know about it. I think she needs to be honest with the guy she's with now. But also, does the guy she's with now really need to know? I mean a lot of girls have guy friends. If I had a boyfriend, I would want him to know I have guy friends. It's not unusual.
If you friend needs more help, she can go to websites & ask. gURL.com is very helpful. Hope it works out =)
2006-08-28 09:00:34 · answer #3 · answered by Angela 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is totally innocent and she's just having friendly conversation I don't see anything wrong with her keeping in contact with this guy. As long as she is open and honest about the whole thing with her current boyfriend and he is secure in their relationship not to worry about it. You should never cut off people who care about you. Boyfriends come and go but real good friends are in your life forever.
2006-08-28 09:03:26 · answer #4 · answered by gemone523 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she's got a great guy, tell her to break the ties. Saying hi in the hallway or in the store is cool, but not texting each other.
2006-08-28 08:56:45 · answer #5 · answered by Mommymonster 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in her same position. As long as she isnt hiding the fact that she still speaks with her ex. I mean, her new boyfriend should know. It is important that your friend doesnt throw her ex out of her life, after all, he is part of her life if they shared something special together in the past. What is she doing wrong by saying hello? If she is doing more she is wrong.....
2006-08-28 08:58:45 · answer #6 · answered by nat_00420 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's hard letting go of old "buddies" but if your going to be true to the one your with you have to. It probably feels like there is no connection between the two to her so it doesn't matter, but to keep the two from connecting she's going to have to get rid of one. Why mess up a good thing?
2006-08-28 08:59:59 · answer #7 · answered by TheMightyOne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's just a friendly hi then it is harmless, but if it has the potential to be more and cause problems then yes she should leave it alone.
2006-08-28 08:58:03 · answer #8 · answered by not meant to be tamed 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are of course right. This other guy is not interesed in anything else but a quick lay.. she should focus on what she has to lose if she does anything about it.
2006-08-28 08:56:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
there shouldn't be a problem with that as long as she's not trying to hide it from him, there is nothing wrong with having friends till you start trying to hide them and lying about it. she should probably tell him about this friend first before he accidentaly finds out and things blow up and then you do have problems
2006-08-28 09:01:00 · answer #10 · answered by no_strings_cowboy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋