I have a male friend who I have been friend with for 10 years! Both of us got marred 3 months apart! Since then we have both had a child (2 months apart) and talk every once an awhile! My husband knows him well and trust me talking to him! My husband is my BEST friend! I would still however like keep my relationship with my friend of 10 years! Here's the problem, his wife doesn't tell him when I call! I have tried being friends with her and invited her over! My friend stops by whenever she isn't around to chat with my husband and I or to bring his child over to play with ours! What do I do? Recently I called to talk to him and she answered his cell phone and told her to have him call my husband back and if she would have told him I KNOW he would have!! Any advice?
2006-08-28 06:19:44 · 18 answers · asked by student 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
She is just jealous of the time you spend with her husband. back off a little bit. Call one day just to talk to her. Maybe once a week and say I'm just calling to see how you are doing. Then once she gets used to it call and ask her to lunch or stop by and bring lunch for just the two of you. Mention your husband a lot so she will know you are not interested in her husband. Make appointments for you, her and your children. Gradually invite the whole family to dinner one night. When they get there touch your husband a lot so she will know that is where your interests lie. It seems like a lot, but if you want to keep his friendship you should go out of your way to try to be her friend also. If she chooses not to accept your offer of friendship then it is her lost and you will know that you have tried.
2006-08-28 06:28:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes relationships don't last forever. The way I look at this is that, hey at least you both had a good relationship before and you'll always have that memory. If the friendship is meant to last, then fate will work her magic, I'm sure. Things that are meant to be will happen. Sometimes people will stand in the way, but people change and so do circumstances. Just stand strong and don't let his wife keep you from a friendship that was created before her. Maybe you can talk to your friend about this issue and he may be able to talk to his wife. She may just be insecure and probably needs to hear what her husband feels about you. KEEP AT IT GIRL!
2006-08-28 06:27:46 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk with your 10 year friend. Sounds like he may have a jealous wife and she may not understand the relationship between the two of you. Your friend may be able to solve some of the missing links. Don't give up a 10 year friendship without a fight!! Good Luck.
2006-08-28 06:23:27 · answer #3 · answered by flutter_butter_fly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sure sounds as if you are more than JUST interested in him and it does, in all probability, smells that way to HIS wife. I really think that you are overplaying your hand.. I know without a doubt that I would not be happy if I was the other guy's wife... not at all.I think that you should explain to your friend of 10 years that you can remain friends but no more telephone calls.
2006-08-28 06:24:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to let your friend know this is going on. But since she is his wife, most likely she has priority in his life over you so you might end up loosing this friendship. But he needs to know this is going on. So if he knows, and doesn't do anything to change/stop the situation and work on this friendship, than you shoud let this friendship go. Unfortunately thats how it works out sometimes... but if he is a true friend worth keeping and worth the hassle, he would try and talk to his wife and let her know this friendship is important to him and make sure you stay in his life.
2006-08-28 06:23:36 · answer #5 · answered by HE'S NOT INTO ME 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stick with him. She is in a phase and this maybe stressful for him. If not supportive with stuff he cares about (you) then se may be inadequate in other support structures as well.
She has the capacity to be better person given time, education and desire. So don't throw away something important. Don't confront and maybe chill abit, but hang in there. Maybe can't be as good friends as before but stay friends nonetheless!
2006-08-28 06:27:04 · answer #6 · answered by Brandon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friendship with her husband can cause uncertainties with her because she may have been cheated on before and don't really believe that men and women can be just friends...
Maybe she is giving her husband loads of grief at home because of you calling and he's just not telling you because he wants to keep the piece!
She unfortunately have a kind of say who he can be friends with and who not, so if he is not putting his foot down and really work on this friendship with you, you can't really push it and its just too bad.......
2006-08-28 06:26:50 · answer #7 · answered by backhand-smash 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I get where you're coming from, how you want to befriend your guy friend's wife. Hmm, if she doesn't seem to make an effort to create a friendship, then it's her lost. No one ever said you have to be friends with everyone. As long as this doesn't hurt your friendship with the guy, you don't have to even like her.
2006-08-28 06:30:00 · answer #8 · answered by lovergirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has a jaelous wife. The only way for this to work is for him to stay friends with you but not to tell his wife about it. I know its sounds like cheating, but since he is not, I don't see the problem. A lot of men do it, since most women are jaelous by nature
2006-08-28 06:23:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it kind of sounds like she does not trust her husband or maybe she just for whatever reason feels threatened by you, I would suggest trying to get to know her better without him invite her to lunch or something she enjoys doing would probably be better harder for her to turn down say concert tickets to her fave. band or something you know she would really like and just hang out with her a few times and go from there
2006-08-28 06:26:25 · answer #10 · answered by dydy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋