Why are men's idea of clean different then their wives' idea of clean?

Question

What is the cause of this? Before you all scream laziness I want to throw out some other possible causes.
1) Men are never taught how to clean. (Some men can clean guns well because their father taught them how to.)
2) Men consider it "women's work". (Men have no problem cleaning out garages.)
3) Lack of punishment for a subpar job. (Men in the military are able to keep things clean.)
I am just throwing these out there to help discussion.

Answer 1

because men consider clean to be functional. if you can get through the house, from room to room, without tripping over something, or kicking something, then the freakin' place is clean. women are different. women clean because they live in the constant apprehension that someone is going to stop by the house and if they do, they're going to see a mess and assume that the lady of the house is a subpar wife and mother, and god knows that gossip like that gets around. that's why. or at least, that's at the heart of the matter, because a woman will never admit to it.

Answer 2

I think all of the above are true. And that men need their ideal of cleaning to be tweaked some to include running a vacuum and properly learning how to wash clothes. I mean anyone can run and hide in the garage or use that as an excuse for cleaning something if there is a tv in there. But I think guys need to stop worrying so much about what is women's work and just be man enough to say "honey, I got the laundry or I'll run the vacuum." I mean a wife can teach him how to do these things and that way it would be less stressful for the both. Everything is in how you are taught and your experience environment, nothing wrong with shaking it up a bit.

Answer 3

It seems that you're pre-supposing that men are somehow "less clean" than their wives, or are more likely to overlook something that is "less clean"? It's very possible that this is the case in some marriages, although I think there are plenty of exceptions. Cleaning the house has traditionally been "women's work", it is true; I imagine that some men still expect it to be this way, especially if their wives are not working outside the home. I don't think it necessarily means that their "idea of clean" is different - in fact, men can be quite picky as to what constitutes "clean" - it's just they expect someone else to do the work. I'm not really in a position to answer this question comprehensively, since I myself don't have a knack for keeping the house "clean", and therefore have to pay a maid to come in and clean. My standards for "clean" are not different, but I don't have either time nor desire to devote myself to achieving them. I'm guessing, it is the case with some men as well.

Answer 4

I have always wondered this myself. I live with my b/f and he is terrible at cleaning. Before we moved in together two years ago, he was very neat and tidy. Now, he says that he doesn't worry about it because I take care of it. This is NOT okay. I tell him that household chores need to be divided evenly, especially because we both work full time and care for our 1 year old. If this is similiar to the prob. you are having, I advise to help out as much as you can. It's hard to keep a house up. Even harder when no one will help you. I don't blame laziness as much as people being brought up with different ideas of "clean". Maybe you and your girl could make a list and decide you will be responsible for what chores and when they should be done. Take a couple nights out of the week to do it together. There's nothing I appreciate more than coming home to a clean house. And hey! It opens my evening up for other, more fun activities!

Answer 5

You've just answered your own question with some very superb theories.
A lot of it with married men I think is that when they do actually clean something they are so proud, but then the wife comes behind them and does it again anyway, the way she wants it done. This is usually without even noticing it's been cleaned. Therefore, they just don't do that particular thing anymore. Eventually, they just stop doing everything all together. This has been the case in my marriage.
Men and women are very different, and this subject is one that is no exception.

Answer 6

Because they don't want to be good at it, simple! If they are, then the woman won't do her part (so is their reasoning). You can teach a dog to S*hit on a paper but man say "I wasn't taught"...bull! As for the Military reference, they're only doing the cleanliness thing cause there's someone with a lot of rank telling them to do it; otherwise, they wouldn't do it in the military either. Ever been to the homes of military guys? Woman's work...old fashioned bull. Now if you told a guy that his dick would grow the more he cleaned up, you'd have men wanting to clean everything in the house! Go figure....it's life.

Answer 7

I do believe some of it is what you have mentioned as well as some of it is just plain laziness! I am a clean freak and my husband is a slob. I have shown him how to clean, so has his mother. He is still a slob. I think I just have him spoiled, because he knows I cannot stand the filth and will clean it up. I know I also have my 6 year old son spoiled, especially when it comes to laundry. Yesterday I didn't wash any clothes. I generally do at least 2 loads a day. My baby boy told me last evening that maybe I should do some laundry because his hamper was getting kind of full! lol

Answer 8

Some men clean better than their wife. A stay at home mom is in the house every day and might not see something as needing cleaned, where someone who is not in the house every day will see it right off the bat. It is alright if the man wants to help and he should help. Some just see housework as a womans job.

Answer 9

Good question, when I broke my arm, and my husband was in charge, well, needless to say, the untidyness was driving me batty. The thing is, he actually, and honestly didn't have a problem with how the place looked. I just wonder if woman are wired to be stressed out easier by clutter than men. Perhaps we clean more, because we get motivated to do so easier than a man does.

When you think about it in terms of our biology it makes sense, for millions of years woman cared for the children, and uncleanliness is a health and safety hazard (especially for little kids), I could see that creating a greater sense of urgency for the woman.

Just my educated guess.

Answer 10

GOOD GOING. Glad you bring it up. Very interesting subject. I was taught to clean but somehow the standards didn't get imprinted on me the same way they were on my wife. There ARE women who are much more slovenly than me. An even better question might be how could we set this courtship/dating process up so that wives and husbands have about the same standards of cleanliness?