He's 26, I'm 24, we are both virgins, but we've gone close enough to having sex to know we aren't bottoms. With ourselves and with other people we just know it just doesn't feel like it's something we'll enjoy. We are really happy with eachother, having found each other, the last 2 virgins on the planet. We agreed not to make it an issue for now, since we aren't going to have sex for months, not until we get to know eachother better. But, eventually, it'll happen.
What can we do?
2006-08-28 03:43:47 · 21 answers · asked by Document Guy 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Well, if you want to do anal, one of ya is gonna have to give it up! If you decide that you do want to, try using "Wet Platinum" lubricant, it's the best for first-timers.
2006-08-28 08:19:20 · answer #1 · answered by pceej 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is more to a relationship than who does what when being intimate with each other. While sex is an important part of a healthy relationship, it is not the most important (or should not be) and there are many alternatives to giving each other sexual pleasure.
It is possible for two men to be totally in love and having a healthy sexual relationship without anal sex. Many gay men even find little or no pleasure in anal sex, so don't participate in it. This would be something you and your new boyfriend would need to work out privately and in advance of making long term commitments.
Personally, I am versatile and like both top and bottom. My partner however, is mainly a 'bottom'. So although I like playing 'catcher' occasionally, it is not a necessity for he and I to be happy together.
2006-08-28 06:03:45 · answer #2 · answered by rp_iowa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it takes some time and relaxation to be a bottom. You have to relax. You would enjoy it. Well one of you would. It is not as bad as it seems the first time. There are also products. But, there are many gay couples out there that are completely happy with just oral sex. But, being able to share sexually is just another way to make you a stronger couple. I think that both of you should share to each other since you both really don't want to. It would be a great thing to do for each other, knowing that you both don't really want to. It would be a selfless act. How better to show your love for one another! Be careful with it though. There are also products that will make the whole process easier!
2006-08-28 03:52:44 · answer #3 · answered by Metacoma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd suggest exploring areas of sexual intimacy that aren't as focused on the top/bottom issue. It also may be that when the time comes, you may find yourselves feeling more open to being a "switch", one who is comfortable with both sides.
Good luck, and I'm glad you guys are experiencing such a positive relationship so far. :)
2006-08-28 03:50:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are already doing the intelligent thing - taking things slowly. You have all the time in the world - no need to rush. You will figure out how to enjoy each other as time goes on and you will discover many different ways to please one another. There is no need to label one another at this point - you might discover that one or both of you are versitle :-)
2006-08-28 04:22:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
One of you need to make the ultimate sacrifice and show how much you love the other by trying it at least once. It's not that bad. Make sure you are lubed up and relaxed. Try taking turns and see how you both like it since you are both tops
2006-08-28 03:48:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, there are many alternatives to anal sex... I have lots of friends who are both tops (or both bottoms) and they have "oral-only" reciprical type relationships. And, since you're both virgins, who knows how your preferences will change over time as you gain more comfort with each other and your own sexuality. Even straights people expand their sexual horizons over time, so who knows what will happen.
Best of luck to you!
2006-08-28 03:48:07 · answer #7 · answered by answerlady1021 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's always a person that likes foreplay and what not. I am a top with my partner for 5 years and enjoy other things. If it is not an issue yet, don't worry about it.
2006-08-28 03:48:20 · answer #8 · answered by justincausejustintime 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are other ways to stimulate your organs, and not just by penetration. Try oral, mutual masturbation. Use your mouth a lot and explore his body while looking for "hot spots" that really turn him on. Sex can be just as satisfying without penetration as with, it all depends on your connection.
2006-08-28 05:00:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give up and become really good friends and find new lovers. Sorry, but if sex is something that you need in a relationship, somethings gotta give.
2006-08-28 06:11:53 · answer #10 · answered by Lotus Phoenix 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋