Should a woman submit herself to her husband?

Question

I have heard men and women argue over the subject that men should be the head of the house and woman are to submit to them. I want to hear others views on this.

God said.."EPH 5:22 ¶ Wives, be subject to your own husbands." Men love this bible verse they use it all the time. But what does this mean and what did God say to men? In the same passage further down God says, "EPH 5:28 ¶ So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it."

What if the man were so in love with his wife that she was his only need? What if the thing that made him happy was to see her safe and fulfilled? Would it be so wrong for her to submit to him? Would it not be a natural response?

Answer 1

A real lover would make it so his partner would want to submit to him... make it so that over time he could ask almost anything of her and she would want (no NEED) to fulfill his fantasy because he would make his fantasy her fantasy... submit yes, but willingly

Answer 2

As a Modern Christian career woman, wife and mother, I've really struggled with this scripture. Because I want to be obedient to God, but at the same time, the idea of being submissive brings to mind the idea of being a good dutiful obedient wife who lives in the shadow of her husband and has no rights. And by the few posts that I read, I see that most people also think of submissive as being obedient as well.

But I finally came to a point of understanding the key difference between obeying and submitting and it's one as a Christian I can accept. Obedience is giving up your own voice and no matter what doing what the other person says. Being submissive is yielding the authority, but still having a voice.

In a business, you cannot have two presidents. One can be a VP and a trusted advisor, but ultimately only one person can be in charge. That's how I look at my marriage. My husband is the head of the house, but I definitely get a say in running our household. We discuss these issues when we disagree, and most of the times he does listen to me, especially if I have valid points. But when it all comes down, my husband makes the final decision, but he also realizes that if he makes the wrong decision, he's also the one accountable.

Answer 3

I think it would depend on the couple's cultures and religion. Some cultures/religions feel a woman should submit to her husband. It may work for them, after all they were always brought up to acknowledge that would happen once they married, and from an early age too.

Personally i don't believe in it but my background states that we're all equal, Emily Plunket and many more gave it wll so women like myself could be independent, free spirits, and feel just part of the human race, not sumissive but proactive members of a relationship between two people. My partner is the old school but he's long come to realise that he was better off with me being the way i am than he would be if i was to play helpless.

Answer 4

I think you expressed the proper perspective to have in a healthy marital relationship. A house divided will not stand. So, there ultimately has to be one leader of a household that listens to the love of his life. I think the reason Paul wrote for women to submit themselves to their husband is because sex can be used as a tool to get their way which is an abusive form of marital relations. The man loves his wife by listening what she says and considering her words in his decision making. I like the words in Alabama's song "your wish is my command" conveying he will back her up. What a wonderful perspective.

The relationship between a husband and wife should compliment each other and not divide. Anyone who constantly has to have their way is selfish and should be avoided. Arguing or harrassment (constantly bringing up a matter) is not right. A discussion concerning an issue should be brought up once (unless some new information is pertinent to the decision making) otherwise it may be seen as harrassement. Proper loving communication is the key to a successful marital relationship.

Todays progressive thinkers beleive there is "rape" in marriage which I disagree with. There should be no such thing in a marriage. There should be no violence in a marriage either. A loving marriage would have none of these. Marriage is permission from God to have sex with your spouse. To say "No!" in marital relations is to say, "I don't love you now." That is not right. A woman should not use sex as a tool to get her way. At the same time a man should listen to his wife and not be selfish.

Answer 5

Absolutely NOT.My wife was in a previous marriage for 21 years where she was treated like a doormat and a punchbag.She had to 'submit' to this monster otherwise she would get thumped.When I first met her,and say,she was in the kitchen,if I came into the kitchen she would pull herself back and hold onto the kitchen unit to let me pass.I asked her why she did this and she said it was better than being punched out of the way.Thankfully that doesn't happen now,but the deep,deep psycological scares this man left my wife with,will take a long,long time to heal.
I love my wife dearly,but I also respect the fact that she is an individual with her own mind.We are EQUAL partners.

Answer 6

'If a man loves a woman in a perfect way (which is what we should strive for) he would put her needs above his needs (or at least equal to his) and his decision would be an unselfish one. If this were only a perfect world this sure would stop a lot of arguing. This would also mean the woman puts her husband's needs at the same (or better) level as hers. In marriage we're supposed to give more than 50%.

Answer 7

The meanings for the word Submit.........

sub·mit

To yield or surrender (oneself) to the will or authority of another.
To subject to a condition or process.
To commit (something) to the consideration or judgment of another.
To offer as a proposition or contention: I submit that the terms are entirely unreasonable

In a loving relationship I don't believe that either partner should surrender to the will and authority of the other. You enter a marriage as individuals with love and commitment to each other - you should share and respect each other for your individuality and by being submissive I think you will lose that because your husband is taking control of you. No one should be in control in a marriage - you work together at everything and come to agreements to reach your goals and desires.

Answer 8

No. Men wrote the Bible. A marriage should be a partnership. Give & take. Anyone who needs to control another person is insecure. A partnership of any kind, business, anything, will not survive if the partners do not respect each other.

Answer 9

A creature with 2 heads won't be able to stay to tell the story in the event that they the two call for administration. they are going to combat over the physique to the exclusion of all else. yet while a guy loves and cares for himself he's able to taking different peoples thoughts into consideration and doing what's right for the two. adult men are the fixers and problem solvers it is in our nature to take cost. so i think of what your question must be is "How does a woman detect a guy she is prepared to place as much as?" in any different case she isn't searching for a mate she is seeking a conflict/ slave / political platform.

Answer 10

I feel woman should submit herself to her husband and man should honor his wife because they are one. Although we live in a society in which woman wants to be independent the truth is that we all need the opposite sex. I dont think there is anything wrong with that. God made us good at different things for each sex and for this reason so that we can live in peace and love together. You must be catholic we just had this read in my church Sunday!

Answer 11

Interetsing question. Well if a man loved his wife that way then there would be no need for her to subit to him, Or I mean he would be submitting in a way to her. I don't think it's a sin for a women not to subit to her husband. Some husbands are not worth subitting to. BUt if there is some that are and the women is of that nature maybe that would be her natural response.