i was with a guy but we broke up because i said i was not ready for sex he said that its important to have sex as thats how the feelings develop. i seem to always have this problem as nowadays everyone has sex within a few weeks of dating and i dont give it up. what should i do? im 27 and have not been in a serious relationship as i dont have sex and men seem to get scared that they will never get it.
2006-08-28 02:06:44 · 25 answers · asked by sam 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
sex IS important, but it shouldn't be the MOST important part of a relationship
don't worry about it, when the right man comes along you'll instinctively know it, and everything will be ok
2006-08-28 02:09:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are a very rare lady indeed today and you are to be congratulated for it. When a guy expects you to have sex with him as part of the deal, you as a person are not what he is interested in.
Even at 27 there is still nothing wrong with having principals and sticking to them.
You may be able to attract a man, for a while, if you being having sex but for how long. You are what the man should be interested in, not how many times he can lay you down.
Ask yourself this. Why have you not been in a serious relationship? This and sex are not tied together. It is nice but they are not related. If a man is truly interested in you as a person he will respect your wish until you become comfortable with it.
I can tell you this. Sex gets in the way of truly getting to know each other. Once you begin that there is little else you want to do.
Don't give up. You will find a man that has finally grown up and all will be fine.
2006-08-28 02:24:37 · answer #2 · answered by John B 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I guess what you are saying is that most men form relationships with women in order to obtain sex in one form or another. The problem appears to be that you wish to form a relationship with a man for another reason.
I'm not clear from what you have written what that reason could be, and so I guess most of the men you have dated are also equally unclear. Maybe you could be a bit more upfront about what exactly you expect to obtain from a relationship with a man without any sex or love.
If you are looking for a father figure, then I guess most single men are really not looking to be your father. Perhaps you should try dating married men with children, or someone already in a committed relationship where they are getting sex. They might be more willing to play your games.
Let's face it, either you accept that the game of love involves sex at some point, or you do not. Therefore, your delay and procrastination suggests uncertainty about the relationship progressing beyond "just good friends". The message you send out by your actions, will say a lot more than the message you send out with words.
2006-08-28 02:22:02 · answer #3 · answered by James 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't sweat it you will find the right guy somewhere you just happen to be finding a lot of jerks. It was months before my fiance and I had sex for the first time and we were both virgins when we did it (i have no idea how that worked out but it was nice) somewhere there is the perfect man for you that cares more about you than sex. You may just be looking in the wrong places or he could be right infront of you and you dont even know it. Good luck
2006-08-28 02:10:42 · answer #4 · answered by alex 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What he said to you was rubbish - you have sex as an expression of love for someone, in other words, you have feelings first. If the men you have been out with leave you for not having sex, then they are not worth bothering with and didn't have any feelings for you anyway. If you are not ready to have sex, then stick to your guns. You will know when it is right and any man who respects you, and your feelings, will wait. Forgive me for asking, but do you have any hang ups about sex anyway? If you have, and you are holding out because of this, then perhaps you need to get it sorted out. If not, then as I say, stick to your guns. One day you will meet someone who will love and respect you and you will be ready for more. Good luck.
2006-08-28 03:01:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hes wrong Ive loved someone for many years that I could never be with in a physical way. He doesnt love you for real. Dont believe him. Get someone more mature. After 2 months if you love the man you might want to do the sex stuff.in the future
2006-08-28 02:09:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men are Men, blood doesn't reach both ends at the same time. If your not ready,don't do it. You will know when the time is right and the roles may reverse. You may want to and he may not. You never know, anything is possible.
2006-08-28 02:19:15 · answer #7 · answered by Deana P 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
your right now a days sex is just the done thing.ithink its great and that u wait until u are ready,and whoever u choose to lose your virginity to will wait and have the same luv and respect u have 4 yourself.good luck and take care,in finding that special person.
2006-08-28 02:14:57 · answer #8 · answered by ticklemyfancy1980 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stick to your guns. Sex is a stage in the natural progression of a relationship. If a man can't be patient until you reach that stage, he isn't for you.
Don't let yourself be pressured.
2006-08-28 02:09:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok ya they r a little pushy but that dosen't mean you have to do it like you said but if you kinda try to just see how it feels before goin all the way with the next guy. i wouldn't say it is important becasue that is all guys want to do i mean it is pretty noticeable but i can't say anything else
2006-08-28 02:11:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋