I'm a 30 year old professional...single..with no prospects. I make around $55,000 a year. My biological clock is tick tick ticking. I'm currently renting an apartment. I've recently started to think about putting money away so that I will be able to have a baby even if the right man doesn't come along. My thought is that I'll save money and eventually buy a home. If I haven't met someone by the time I'm 35, I'd like to go ahead and be a mom. I just can't imagine never having children. I want to do the right thing though. Does this seem like a reasonable plan? Is 35 a good age to have a child?
2006-08-27 16:00:12 · 15 answers · asked by mountaingirl 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I am glad to see you are waiting 5 years before pursuing this on your own. I think you have a sound plan intact.
2006-08-27 16:03:47 · answer #1 · answered by spartan_117 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I got pregnant when I was 17 and had the baby when I was 18. Not the ideal situation obviously. However, I am now 34 and had been thinking about having more children for a few years now. I am also a professional and have a decent enough income to support a family. I was widowed a few years ago and just havent met anyone else I wanted to marry, but I knew I still wanted children. After looking into all the options, I decided I was ready to have another child even if it was on my own. I worked with my doctor to choose a sperm donor and was inseminated a few weeks ago. There was some prep work involved, bloodwork etc. But it was not nearly as complicated as I thought it would be. Talk to your doctor now, he or she may want to start you on prenatal vitamins now. If you plan on using a donor, they will also have you start using ovulation predictor kits (ClearPlan Easy are the best bet). Also as shocking at this may sound, a woman in her 30's is considered to be at an "advanced maternal age", so the doctor might want to monitor your progesterone levels for a few months before the insemination. The sperm sample costs around $500. This would also be a good time to read up on your company's maternity leave policy. You may also want to consider signing up for Dependent Child Care Flexible Spending Account if your company offers it. Even if you dont already own a home, there is nothing wrong with having a baby while living in an apartment. Doing the right thing, is doing whats right for you. If your heart is telling you this is the right thing, go for it.
By the way, the insemination procedure worked..I am pregnant and couldnt be happier. I hope everything works out well for you.
2006-08-27 17:08:59 · answer #2 · answered by Willow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders. However, it's a lot of work to take care of a baby, even with two parents, especially for the first two months when the baby eats and cries around the clock. Hopefully you'll meet the man of your dreams before then! If not, don't be afraid to ask for help from parents, friends, etc. or you'll burn out for sure. Good luck!
2006-08-27 16:09:13 · answer #3 · answered by Bloor Street Mama 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is great that you aren't just rushing into this and going to the clinic today. You still have plenty of time to meet someone and plenty of time to have children. I think that sounds like a great plan! Some may say it is selfish to have a child without a father. But I know many single mothers who have raised their children better than they could have if they were a two parent household. But don't give up on yourself!
2006-08-27 16:06:43 · answer #4 · answered by . 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am 35 and having a baby in two or three weeks and I think I'm much more ready to have a baby than I was when I was 10 years younger, both financially and emotionally. Also because you want a child that makes it even better. Being a wanted child will make him or her even happier... Good luck to you!
2006-08-27 17:31:47 · answer #5 · answered by Faith W 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
having a kid on your own, without a support system is nuts.
we have 3. the amount of time you will need to put into it to even think that you are doing it right is enormous.
how are your school systems in the area?
how is day care in your area?
35 isn't bad to have a kid. but you don't want to be soooo far away agewise that you can't physically enjoy them.
keep looking for a good guy, they are out there. ask what you want in the guy and be realistic. it is important to have 2 people raising the kid (i know some people won't like that statement, buy you are asking opinion). you need the alternate perspective another parent brings.
2006-08-27 16:11:00 · answer #6 · answered by joe f 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't see anything wrong with women being single mothers. If you can afford it and have the time. There are lots of women who raise babies on their own. I think you should wait maybe and see if that someone comes along but don't settle for anyone. You want to make sure he is the right guy.
2006-08-28 03:57:26 · answer #7 · answered by volcomgrly23 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like a very intelligent woman with a very intelligent plan. Women have babies after 35 all the time now, it's almost the "in" thing. Best wishes!
2006-08-27 16:06:19 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't see a promblem with it, you have a good head on your shoulders, make good money, if you want to have a child you should..my aunt was 41 when she had her son and she's happy with it, had time to her self, made herself a career then had a child, sounds like a reasonable plan to me...God bless
2006-08-27 16:14:14 · answer #9 · answered by Nita and Michael 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Now these days women are having babies in their 40's and so on!! I think that your plan sounds great, but I hope that you can share parenting with a father also. But it is whatever is best for you!! Good luck
2006-08-27 16:04:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋