...marry some one even though your daughter doesn't feel comfortable with it? Oh yeah, and your daughter was raped less than 6 months ago so she doesn't trust men and you didn't know until 3 weeks ago.
-Iman J.
2006-08-27 15:52:32 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
14 and she's not lying about it.
2006-08-27 19:30:47 · update #1
Time to stop thinking about yourself and focus on your daughter. If the guy really loves you, he'll stick around. You can't just find another daughter.
2006-08-27 16:03:41 · answer #1 · answered by queenblafalot 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If your daughter was raped and you just found out about it, I think your main concern should be your daughter, not whether you should get married or not.
Your daughter is probably not going to feel "comfortable" around too many men, probably only really trusted family members. But your forcing her to reside with a new male figure, will keep her on her guard and less open with her feelings because she doesn't feel like she can let her guard down to talk about what happened.
2006-08-27 16:00:52 · answer #2 · answered by whatelks67 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough one but I think you and your daughter need to heal that wound first after all it's your daughter and she need you right now and she has to build that trust with him so i wouldn't push this guy on her right now. You as a parent have to put your children feelings before your own and that will build a stronger bond with everyone involved ..Just think you decide to get married you don't have time to support her for planning the wedding then after you don't have time because you're enjoying your husband and he need you ...so deal with this first and you want have to deal with an angry daughter that you turned your back on her when she needed you most.!!
2006-08-27 16:01:04 · answer #3 · answered by classy chic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would wait until my daughter worked through her issues. I would not even consider bringing a man into the home full time that soom after she was raped. The focus would be on my daughter not on getting married. Any good man would understand.
2006-08-27 15:57:28 · answer #4 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your first duty is to your children. Time is the pencillin for the heart. You have to get your daughter into thearpy then sort out the issues from there.
Don't get married until you have this sorted out. If he's a good guy he'll understand.
Did your daughter really get raped?.....or is she saying this to halt the marriage? Just a thought......
Good luck
2006-08-27 16:04:12 · answer #5 · answered by hoyhoydc 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Certainly not. How old is the daughter? Anyway, I think the daughter should be the priority, unless she isn't living in the house.
2006-08-27 16:04:04 · answer #6 · answered by Margarita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No.
Your daughter comes first. Help her heal and get over the emotional pain she must be experiencing.
If this person you intend marrying really loves you, then he can wait, because he will understand the situation.
2006-08-27 16:00:25 · answer #7 · answered by amoreflowers 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to just deal with what your daughter is going through right now. she went through something that just changed her entire life and how she looks and feels about things and she needs her mother to be there 100% and not be worrying about if she should get married right now. and did you stop to think that maybe your daughter doesn't like the man that your with? maybe you should ask her how she feels about him aside from what she just went through.
2006-08-27 15:59:23 · answer #8 · answered by jeanenne h 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would put my daughter first and deal with the fact that she went through something very traumatic. Put your wants on hold until you make your daughter feel safe and secure again.
2006-08-27 15:55:58 · answer #9 · answered by orionsgirl76 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your daughter's safety and peace of mind should be priority one. men will come and go. she is your child for LIFE. consider that if nothing else. you don't want her to think you are choosing him over her. if you opt not to marry him because of how your daughter feels, he will understand - if he is a real man. i think you should talk to her to see where her head is. see if she is just being a bratty kid or is truly terrified. talk to him about it as well. explain your daughter's feelings and see how he reacts. if he is really for you, you will know it then.
2006-08-27 15:59:35 · answer #10 · answered by Shorty 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋