What should I do?

Question

I have just come back from a weekend spent with my boyfriend. We spent a nice weekend but today we argued a little. I started to cry and he got really upset with me and told me that these kind of situations makes him hesitate to be sure about us. He told me that he thinks we need time apart. He reassured me he is not breaking up with me but he needs time to think about us, his life, his career plans. What do you think I should do? I wanted to find out from him today if he sees me in his future and he said that he feels like I am always pressuring to talk to me about us and he says our fights and my cries do not make him feel too convinced about us. When I was leaving today, he kissed me and said to me " see you ok?". He said he does not want anybody else, he just wants time on his own as he feels exhausted with everything.

Answer 1

He obviously is not sure which is no basis for a long term relationship,, run away

Answer 2

Yeah, u pressed him too much. Just let him cool down. He will find you later.
At least, he is good and care abour ur feeling. He doesn't want you to think too much ..so he kissed you goodbye and assure that is not breaking up.
If you love him, please give him time. This way he can feel you respect him and you really listen to what he said.
I know you are missing him like crazy and wonder what's his answer. I totally understand this feeling. But don't contact him today. If you talk to him, I KNOW YOU WILL start asking and asking more question ..eventually you just become pressing him AGAIN. And this sure will make him leave you fater and easier to make up his mind.
Trust me. If he loves you, he will call you soon. When he is alone and lonely, he will start thinking about the POSITIVE things about you. So, that's good.
Let's say if he doesn't call you up in 1- 2 weeks (I don;t think he will), then you should send a mini-gift to him (don't attach a note ..just a gift).
Try to image how he feels if you put utself into his shoes. Sure, you will feel sweet yet you don't feel pressure,right? So, will he.

Just remember.
This is not breaking up!
This is only a process to make your relationship stronger and last longer.
He needs time to think about it. Is VERY GOOD.
You know he is really seriously about this relationship.

Good Luck!
Pray for u.
You guys will be together happily (provided that if you don't call him this week..hehe)

Answer 3

I have 2 sons and a daughter and they're always talking to me about their ups and downs in regards to people in their lives. It has been my experience that women are a lot more interested in long lasting relationships than guys are. As a results, you tend to drive the guys away. You're too young to be stressing about a future with other people when you don't have a firm grip on your self. Lighten up on yourself and him. Have some fun, enjoy each other for the time being...and let the future happen (together) naturally...or not.

Answer 4

You must understand that men in general like a quiet life and do not like their boat rocked. You really must stop pressuring him to talk to you about the two of you. It sounds very much to me as though he is not yet ready for commitment.

As hard as it seems you really need to give him that space. They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder you will have to wait and see if this rings true in your boyfriends case.

Sorry if I sound a bit callous but sometimes plain speaking is the best policy. Go and have a good nights sleep and enjoy the rest of the bank holiday.

Answer 5

well, he's given you good reasons why he wants some time away....to think about his life and about the both of you. i would have asked him how long he was considering the separation. he also says that he feels pressure from you, so you don't want to force a situation, things should come naturally. if the relationship doesn't come naturally, and you fight all the time, you have to question how come and make changes.

Answer 6

It sounds to me as if your boyfriend is feeling some pressure & my advice to you is to give him some space. Tell him you love him & want him & are willing to give him the time he needs as long as he promises to remain honest with you about his feelings & his plans. It seems like this is the only thing you can do as i doubt crying & applying even more pressure will make a difference. If its meant to be then a few weeks apart will be like a breath of fresh air to both of you.

Answer 7

Sweetie I am going through the same thing with my boyfriend. He starts every argument, doesn't like to talk, and if I have a concern he will add on to it so he could be the victim. I am starting to realize that I am in a unhealthy relationship. I ask myself, do I really want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me...NO!! Although I care for him, I need to be happy. I know what your going through and it hurts. We ended it last night and I have been crying since. Love hurts and I think it's time for both of us to face it and move on as hard as it is. Don't be like me and make a fool of yourself by begging him or trying to plead your side. One thing that counts is your pride and who you are. Don't loose it, I almost did. Good luck and keep me posted!

Answer 8

Only time will tell, until then, trust you heart, not your head. It will show him your true self and then he can see and decide whether you are the one he wants to be with the rest of his life. (Assuming you know him well and he is trustworthy enough for you)

You should also have a personal deadline which you are comfortable with waiting for him. After that, move on if he still can't decide.

Answer 9

have a couple of weeks where you concerntrate on yourself have have a good time- go out with the girls and forget your worries. i'm sure that when he sees your having fun he'll come running because he'll see what a great girl he has and doesn't want to lose. he is probably scared by the strong feeling he has found and isnt sure how to handle them.

Answer 10

That reminds me of a Beautifull South song "need a little time" that song makes a lot of sense.