IN MY DIVORCE DEVREE I WAS ORDERED TO GIVE HALF MY 401K TO. I WAS MARRIED TO HIM 25YRS PLUS-HE CHEATED AND WALKED AWAY FROM ME AND MY KIDS-HE HAD NOTHING TO HIS NAME BUT WAS ABLE TO MAKE ME REFINANCE MY HOME TO GIVE HIM 65K WHICH MADE MY MRTG PYMT GO UP- I HAD PURCHASED A BRAND NEW DODGE RAM P/U TRUCK WHICH HE WAS AWARDED AND ALSO HALF MY 401K- I WAS ALLOWED TO KEEP MY HOME- I WAS DENIED EVERYTHING I ASKED FOR- HE MADE A LITTLE MORE MONEY THAN ME-I JUST GOT FIRED ON FRIDAY FROM MY JOB FOR TALKING TO A CUSTOMER ON THE PHONE ABOUT MY DIVIRCE AND HIM (SCUMBAG) I NOW HAVE NO MEANS TO PAY FOR ANYTHING, WHICH I WAS BARELY MAKING IT WHEN I WAS WORKING-IS THERE ANY LEAGAL WAY THAT I CAN KEEP ALL MY 401K? I HAVE 80K AND AM SUPPOSE TO GIVE HIM HALF-HE CALLED THIS MORNING AND THREATENED ME THAT IF I WANT TO KEEP MY HOME AND MAKE THE MRTG PAYMENT I BETTER SIGN THE QDRO PAPER THE ATTORNEY SENT ME. EVEN IF I DO SIGN THE PAPER I HAVE TO WAIT 60 DAYS FOR HIM TO GET HIS HALF, THERZ NO HOLD ON MY 401
2006-08-27 08:21:44 · 16 answers · asked by Bonitacheena 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If it was Court Ordered then you probably have to.
2006-08-27 08:24:10 · answer #1 · answered by NickyO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he sucks, depends what state u live in. First of all, i would get a baracuda of a lawyer and appeal the court order. Since you lost your job, there is now a different situation. If you are in a community property state then legally half of your 401 k is his, only if it was earned during the marriage. Also, the house is legally 1/2 his. but because u were married for so long I think that you are getting the short end of the stick. Check this with a lawyer, there are free consultations.....and what about child support????? Good Luck to you!
2006-08-27 15:24:33 · answer #2 · answered by charlie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You get to keep half of your 401 plus the house. What about the equity in it? Did you give him half of that? Im sure if he had a 401K plan you would want half of it wouldn't you? Marital property is just that! Im sorry he was cheating but in most places it dosent matter why the divorce is happening. Just make sure you get at least half and be glad he is not taking you for custody of the children.
By the way, Why would you EVER discuss your divorce with a customer on the phone at your job????????????? That was your livelyhood and now its gone too. Im sure it wasnt for this one isolated incodent either. Get over it and move on. Sign the QDRO and get on with your life.
2006-08-27 15:37:40 · answer #3 · answered by Julzz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get hold of your atty or the courts and tell them hes threatening you to follow thru on the divorce decree. Thers not too much you can do about the 401, sorry, but you can petition the court for a remodification hearing on spousal support since you lost your job, but his threats are definitely going to work against him and just maybe if he gets the judge mad enough, it could cost your ex dearly, but may not be what you hope for but neither him or his atty can threaten you to do anything. Now if you were to move, you could offer him the house in exchange for his interest in your 401K, but unless he dies theres not much to do.
2006-08-27 15:49:06 · answer #4 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like you are paying for alot of what he got, that's not right. The said thing is to appeal it cost's money, and that's what's wrong with the system. If you have no money, you get bad representation in court. I have been in a simular situation, I will being paying for some of her and her kids stupidity for the rest of my life, as we refinanced and paid the charge cards off at the time six months before she left. I couldn't prove anything, we used the credit cards to live on will we used the paychecks to support her drunk grownup kids. She destroyed any proof there was.
2006-08-27 15:38:36 · answer #5 · answered by whatshisface 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your husband was an azzwhole for treating the way he did. he should have left you before he started cheating.
yes, you have to give up half your 401k. the reason is simple------it's the law. blah, blah, blah about the ram and mortgage. he made more money, but you think it's all yours?
i'm glad your ex-boss agrees with your ex-husband and me your ex-yahooanswerguy!
i lost nearly everything because of a divorce, and my wife never made a cent during the 7 year ordeal. i rebounded, you can too.
2006-08-27 15:30:13 · answer #6 · answered by bill loomer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg that sucks. If you can ... I would appeal the ruling, and see if you can't have a different judge look at it (I don't know if this is possible, but it never hurts to ask) other than that ... If you can possible do it, don't cash your 401K ... they can't order you to cash it until you feel the need to do it, and the more he and his lawyer press for you to cash it, the more like that you will be able to get a judge to over turn the ruling. Good luck in whatever you do in resolving this.
2006-08-27 15:29:21 · answer #7 · answered by Zenas Walter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if your lawyer cant do no better than that fire him and go back to court cause your getting the shaft if he cheated on you and you have custody of the kids he should not ever come out better than you in the divorce if still cant get justice grab out that 401k and spend it on a trip to switzerland or the caymans different banking laws there but dont take that crap fight fight fight.
2006-08-27 15:32:41 · answer #8 · answered by bill w 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear about this. I'm wondering how he managed all this. Did you try to charge him with adultry and abandonment during the hearing. I would have. I don't know if there's any way to undo it once it's been ordered. Sorry, wish I could help. Good luck with everything.
2006-08-27 15:26:40 · answer #9 · answered by sweet.pjs1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a new lawyer and go back to court to fight it. Plus, bring evidence of the cheating.
2006-08-27 15:24:36 · answer #10 · answered by Pantherempress 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
has your lawyer filed an appeal?
YOU do have a lawyer, don't you?
you may not keep it all, but you will certainly take a HUGE loss in early withdrawal taxes, like 60%!!!
now that you are unemployeed, file for a stay
get a lawyer
record his calls
2006-08-27 15:32:38 · answer #11 · answered by mike c 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋