2006-08-27 07:17:37 · 7 answers · asked by kissmybum 4 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
Dear John
That is a nice fairy tale! Not all adoptive parents are like the Cleavers! My daughter and I just reunited. Her life was hell! Not all adoptive parents are like hers either! She never had a Christmas! She was lied to about just about everything. Adoption records should be open if both parties agree. We both tried for years and it was just luck that we both signed on to the same site!
2006-08-27 08:20:39 · answer #1 · answered by Star of Florida 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I understand the need to want to know and I understand that you might be curious to know such things as why you were put up for adoption... because they chose not to abort you! They chose life rather than a termination of your life before you drew your first breath. And letting you go was an immense sacrifice that no mother wants ever to make!
The circumstances are never justifiable enough because words never do justice to what was going on around the parents, or the mother, the social stigmas/pressures, the financial situation, hardships, etc. Also, there are some things that we have difficulties verbalizing due to our own personal upbringing or or fears or whatever.
Do you feel that your parents that raised you were unfit? Or that they did not do a good job in raising and caring for you? That goes through every adoptive parents' mind when children start asking questions.
Sometimes it's best to leave things alone. Not all reunions turn out for the best. Count your blessings that you had parents that loved you and took you in. That's the most important thing of all.
Honor and love those that opened their hearts and home and cared for you.
2006-08-27 08:05:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
No, because sometimes the adoptee only causes the birth mother emotional pain when he/she intrudes on the woman's life.
What if they were the result of a rape? Do you really think the woman will be happy to see the Rapist Jr. on her doorstep, asking all kinds of questions, not caring at all how he/she is making the woman feel?
Medical history is one thing, but hunting the birth mother down without her consent is another. Keep in mind, she could have chosen abortion, then it would never even be an issue.
As far as the "curiosity" and stupid questions - unless you have had a transplant, you have your own eyes, you like what you like just because, get over it!
2006-08-27 09:47:33 · answer #3 · answered by innocence faded 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I don't think they should be able to contact their birth parents without the birth parents permission first. Medical records are one thing, but most people who give up their infant children did so for a good reason. Let sleeping dogs lie.
Just be glad your Mom Chose life! And your real Mom and Dad are the ones that came home from work every day, read you stories, put bandaides on skinned knees, made Christmas magical and kissed you good night and all that other Mom and Dad stuff. Those are your REAL parents.
2006-08-27 07:20:57 · answer #4 · answered by John16 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
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2016-09-30 01:27:59 · answer #5 · answered by blumenkrantz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, at the age of 18. Just my opinion.
2006-08-27 07:21:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
I think so after they become an adult.
2006-08-27 07:21:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋