I married an American and I gave up on my Green Card because I found out?

Question

later on my husband was not a good husband. I left him, came back to my country, faced a lot of difficulties but did NOT lose my dignity. He told me I was crazy to leave America and all the possibilities there, but diginity and happiness are priceless, no Green Card would seduce me to the point to live with a man that made me so very unhappy. Do you think I was right or wrong by doing so?

Answer 1

You are one wise woman and my hat goes off to you. I wish you all the happiness in the world and one day the right man will come along and treat you the way a husband should with respect and dignity. Smile and the world smiles with you. :-)

Answer 2

Well, to me it would depend on what you mean by 'bad husband'. If you mean he cheated on you, then yeah, you at least didn't do the wrong thing. If he beat you, it might be necessary to divorce him to ensure your personal safety.

But in that case, I probably wouldn't remarry after that, because to me marriage is a spiritual relationship and the marriage bond stays intact in God's eyes basically unless there's been adultery.

I would also rethink that idea that 'he made me unhappy'. You are unhappy because you had expectations from him that were not fulfilled. The only way to stay in the relationship would be to either change those expectations, or decide that he doesn't have to fulfill them.

If you feel that your expectations are appropriate, that you should not compromise on them, then perhaps it isn't possible to live together. But unless the situation is either adultery or, for example, that you have completely different religious values and he just doesn't want to live with you because of that, then I would assume that two solutions exist: 1) stay married and faithful, or 2) divorce and stay faithful (i.e. single).

And either way, wait to see what happens - for God, all things are possible. May he bless you.

Answer 3

I don't think you were wrong. Tell him your country may not have the possibilities his country does, but that is a good thing when you want to avoid the possibility of having a crappy American husband.

Answer 4

Good for you..you made the right decision. I hope you find happiness in your country. No amount of money can replace happiness,dignity and your own peace of mind.

Answer 5

YOU DID EVERYTHING RIGHT YES

NO MAN IS WORTH THE RED WHITE AND BLUE FREEDOM EVERYONE JUST POURS ON LIKE SYRUP.
YOU SEE YOUR EX HUSBAND COULDNT EVEN GET A WOMAN HERE OUT OF THE MILLIONS OF AMERICAN LADIES TO CHOOSE FROM.
POOR SOUL
HE HAD TO SEND OFF AND FIND A UNSUSPECTING VICTIM.
WE OF THE USA APOLOGIZE FOR OUR AMERICAN MEN AND DO HOPE YOU COME HERE FOR A VISIT.
BUT DONT TAKE HOME THE MEN IT ISNT WORTH IT.
YES YOU DID EXACTLY WHAT ANY NORMAL PERSON WOULD DO!

Answer 6

You made the best decision for yourself. It doesnt matter what others may think. You sound like a very strong person with much respect for yourself. And only you are the one who needs accept your RIGHT decision!

Answer 7

Good for you, honey!

Any man that thinks he's getting property is sick and dangerous, and you have done the best thing you could do.

Please, don't hate all of us American men...there are guys like me that know how to treat a lady.

Good Luck!

Answer 8

Hell NO!!! Good going! Not many people would do that considering you had a green card and knew you would risk losing it if you left him. It shows you have pride and respect for yourself and what you stand for.

Cheers to you!!!

Answer 9

I think you were absolutely right!!! He obviously considered that green card something that had absolute power over you and that led him to believe he could treat you poorly and you would put up with it but you showed him!! Good for you!!

Answer 10

hi.yes you did the right thing.you were unhappy with the man.it's no use standing by someone only for the possibilities america could offer you and not because of love.