i have a friend that is my room mate and when i went into my apartment he was in the bathroom putting on make up he was in a wig and everything he even had false boobs he had a pink sweatshirt on and had a skirt and pantyhose and heels it was really feaky i don't think he is gay i know that he has never had a girlfriend i am just really confused
2006-08-27 06:14:55 · 39 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Ask him what it was all about...and get over it.
2006-08-27 06:17:50 · answer #1 · answered by Isabella 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
First, do you know if this was for a costume party or some other specific activity? One event does not make a pattern.
Second, Transvestitism is not necessarily about being gay or transgendered. Some people may just enjoy dressing in clothes of the opposite sex. Granted some do so because of sexual gratification. A significant portion of transvestites are heterosexual, repeat, heterosexual.
Your confusion is understandable. Here is someone you've known for a fair amount of time and he's engaging in an activity that makes you uncomfortable. Here are some things that you should consider --
Do some reading about cross-dressing. Find out more about the motivations of the people who practice it. Knowing more about the behavior may help some of your anxieties.
Talk to your roommate about what you saw and how you feel about it. Listen, I mean really listen, to what he says. If you're uncomfortable around him, he's going to notice even in passing.
If you want to stay as roommates, consider some type of signal or designated times for his activities. For example, if he is going out "dressed-up", you may just want to delay getting back to the apartment until he leaves. This leaves you the option of avoiding seeing your roommate in female clothing and reducing the discomfort level.
If the two of you can't resolve how you feel about the situation, you may want to reconsider sharing the apartment. After all, you're now aware of what your roommate does. You are going to be thinking about what else does he have in the apartment and possibly getting anxious about it. This is likely to contribute to tension between the two of you.
On all accounts, try and stay friends with him. After all, you were friends before this discovery. Is it such a major item that you'd be willing to end the friendship?
2006-08-27 06:40:40 · answer #2 · answered by eriurana 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I don't know much about the dynamics of the cross dressing thing except its fairly common and usually doesn't have a lot to do with the BEING a women, it has more to do with the feeling of the clothing and some inner sexuality thing...
...if you have a friendship going with him and you want that to continue.. don't make a deal at all about it. Make a joke, dress up like a VIKING and say, "this dress up stuff is fun!"
Or..Try on one of his blouses and go, "Na, the colors all wrong for me" and then ask him about the deal once and for all!
Make up a story that your brother's friend used to do it and he was way cool...no big deal!
If you can't face this or both of you get "weird" cause of it, you better get out of there! People kill themselves out of pride sometimes!
I don't envy this publishable moment in your life dude! What a DRAG!
2006-08-27 06:26:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I could understand the confusion but there are some guys that do like to cross dress, but don't let that hinder your friendship because you are friends with him for a reason. What I mean is you became friends with him before you even knew about this 2nd lifestyle he has. So if you stop liking him now then he will know why.
2006-08-27 06:19:18 · answer #4 · answered by Miss Vira 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to look at it like this. If your friend chooses to wear female cloths then thats ok . There is lots of men who do this and 95% of them are straight. Most crossdressers do this because it is fun and it make then feel good. I do it all the time and my reason is that i like girls cloths much better then mens. So try not to judge him , he is still the same friend as before. Talk to him and get the lowdown. Remember that cloths are cloths and its his choice.
2006-08-29 01:07:48 · answer #5 · answered by jerry g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW!! sounds like me!! I did this exact thing! Not in the same circumstance, but the same thing. I just felt I was getting in touch with my inner self and feeling good about the clothes and all. I learned later that I really was gay. Oh well, that was me. It's OK to be confused, just let him be what he feels.
2006-08-30 07:55:04 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most cross dressers aren't gay!
Talk to him about it and be cool. For goodness sake, it's not as if his putting on pantyhose is injurious to your health! Although, I should've liked to have seen your face - bet it was a picture!
2006-08-27 06:48:21 · answer #7 · answered by unclefrunk 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is your friend accept it. You do NOT have to approve of what someone does to accept them. IF he wants everyone to know he will tell them in his own time it is not your place to say anything. If you do say anything expect consequences JUST because that is the way people are.
2006-08-27 06:21:21 · answer #8 · answered by anita_reel 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you are truly his Friend..then just accept it...he is obviously a freak...so just go with it..be supportive...he may be embarrassed ..perhaps he doesn't know how to handle it..so just be there for him. If this is something you just cannot deal with and he is your roommate then it is obvious one of you would have to move...but don't let this ruin your friendship.
2006-08-27 06:19:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just because he crossdresses doesn't mean he's gay! get with the program.
2006-08-30 21:33:28 · answer #10 · answered by elymendoza1984 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be confused, give him his privacy and don't ask unnecessary questions. It's probably just a phase, or curiosity. Don't trip on it, unless you want to dress up to.
2006-08-27 06:19:29 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋