I have an 8 yr old bi-racial child and some of my family keeps using racial slurs in front of me.Being my sister.I can't stand it.My mother keeps on definding her like "She didn't mean it".After 8 yrs she should know not to use certian words around me.What can I say or do to get them to understand we are not a racist family and we won't raise our children to be either?
2006-08-27 05:08:05 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
The advice you are receiving here is pretty sound. The difficult part is following through with it. First of all, you need to have a meeting with ALL of your family (sister and parents, etc..not your kids) to let them know that you don't like their "accidental" slurs. Give them notice that they have one more chance to straighten up or you will consider their next slur as notice to you that they don't want anything to do with you or your family (husband, you and kids).
If they slur one more time, you have to take care of your kids. You are their mom and you have the duty to keep them from all harm. In this case, the harm is the most harmful because its from your children's own family. Break off all ties with them. Don't call, email, return calls, answer the phone if its them, or anything to make them think that you wouldn't really defend your child more then love your sister. Yes, in this case, you defend your child more than love your sister. Hopefully, your sister and parents will get the picture. If they don't, you have many other people that went down this road before you, and they all survived. You should remember the two rules of happiness, and teach them to your children...Always smile and Be Polite. Good Luck
2006-08-27 05:46:58 · answer #1 · answered by marks3kids 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all sorry you are going through this, that is awful. It's been 8 years and your family still says things? I hate to be mean and I don't know your family, but from what you wrote, your sister is racist. There is not much you can do to change her mind. This is her nephew/neice and if she can't put her comments/ thoughts aside, then she has a problem. The best thing which is very sad for everyone especially your child is keep him/her away from your family.. You and your family don't need that negative, rude, racist environment. Again I am sorry for you and your child. We have enough problems in this world and you don't need it from your family...
2006-08-27 05:21:46 · answer #2 · answered by Bec 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your family comes first, I mean, you, your child and your husband. Stay apart from your other family till they realize the awful way they behave. It may not work, but at least you will be protecting your REAL family.
Good luck.
2006-08-27 05:31:30 · answer #3 · answered by Ms.Cook 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your sister she can think whatever she wants, but you expect her to keep her mouth shut.
She most certainly did too mean it, tell your mother you love her, but you will not accept unacceptable behavior.
2006-08-27 05:22:56 · answer #4 · answered by ms_books3736 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋