what should i do????????????

Question

i have a boyfriend of 3 years 1st year great 2year we had time off 3rd year we got back together and ever since we got back together it is nothing but arguements
we cannot not seem to get along . he bores me and fusterates me everytime i want to talk to him or spend time he doesnt have time or he is tired
but he has all the time and energy for his friends
the question is what should i do?
i know leaving him is better for me but why is it difficult?

Answer 1

Of course it's scary and difficult. You've been involved for three years. But, if you know that what's best for you is to end it, but don't, then I can only assume one thing. You are just too weak and spineless to bother improving your life. We are free to make choices, but we aren't free of the consequences of our choices.

Answer 2

I'll answer your second question first...why is it difficult?

Because your in a routine and like me, have invested a lot in the relationship, money as well as energy. I look around and see all that we have accomplished and I wonder if walking now would be the best for me or just to continue on for I haven't the heart to start over again with someone new. I love him, I know he loves me, but is the arguments and lack of attention all I have to look forward to the rest of my life?
What you should do is what your inner feelings are telling you to do. If a compromise of some sort is not reach soon then the problems/arguments will continue to escalate until someone gets hurt or things said that can't be unsaid. If his friends are more important than time with you, I can personally tell you there will always be more friends down the road for him to spend time with. Him being tired is an excuse like the old joke about women not wanting sex because they have a headache, it's a cop-out anyway you look at it. Heck I'm tired to but I don't put the relationship on the back burner.

Only you will know when you have had enough of living this way. One morning you will wake up and say enough is enough and pack up and go and not look back. It took me 20 years in a marriage just like you described before I said no more.

Answer 3

Sorry I'm saying you but this shows that he does not love you..
It is difficult because you still love him, and you are interested in him and care for him. But you can't carry on like that...
When you think is the right time and he is not tired or has to go somewhere tell him that you want to have a conversation with him. Tell him that you understood that he hasn't got feelings for you. Ask him if this is true or if something else takes place (he may be confused or psycholgically tired of something)
If he does not warrant his actions then you have to leave him, bcs this means he does not love you...
Good Luck!!!

Answer 4

Two words: comfort zone.

It is hard to get out of relationships, even bad ones, b/c humans are creatures of habit and we enjoy having some stability in our lives, even if it isn't good for us.
We tend to get into a routine and we have a hard time getting out of it b/c it is easy.
You are obviously not happy in this relationship, it isn't healthy, and you are emotionally drained. Take a big step and just get out.
It may not feel right at first b/c you will have to develop new routines and you will be out on you own. ( I mean going home to arguing and frustration is sometimes easier than going home to your television set.) But after a little while, you will feel SO much better about you and your life in general!!
Get a support network of friends that will talk to you whenever you need it. I am sure some of your friends are just as tired of your relationship with this guy as you are.
I'll bet you have a friend who has tried to be supportive of you all along, but on the inside, she's known that this guy isn't good for you and she will be so willing to help you get out!!
You obviously can't grow as a person in this sort of chaos, so you will do yourself a huge favor to move on!

Answer 5

its difficult for you cause you are too used to the ides of hi being around you have probably grown up with him but girl trust me i hav ahd the same experience and its better to just let the realtionship break at the end of the day even you are gonna be tired and you might just change your whole point of view about realtionships it is advisable for you to dump the guy before it becomes mpossible for you to
best of luck

Answer 6

its difficult because you care alot for him,& your probably wondering what you can do to save this relationship.theres always going to be arguements that doesnt mean you stop loving the person.Just that if it gets physical,or the argueing is becoming abusive.then girl just go !!! you guys are done.if hes not willing to take the time to fix whats wrong ,then he doesnt deserve you.

Answer 7

it is difficult becasue in a way you are comfortable in your dysfunction. The unknown is often scary.
It is time for you to either get some counseling and have him agree to work on the relationship.or move out asap;
You deserve better

Answer 8

Because you don't want to go into the unknown. As frustrating as it is being with him at least you know what to expect. Break up with him and move on to the next chapter of your life.

Answer 9

try to talk to him what u feel,n ask him where d relationship is going and what r ur expectations and his too, try to communicate .communication is a key to a good relationship,n also dont ever interfare in his life guyz never like that,n also dont run back of him

Answer 10

It's like a habit. It's hard to break. But you must do it.