My husband is in a position of authority at his work and is friendly and good looking. He works with cute girls, lots of friends and employees. He comes home tipsy about 3-4 nights out of the week, sometimes only two, but never less than one.
Everyone there drinks together and he gets his social life through his work. I wonder sometimes if he isn't having TOO much fun, if he has a crush at work, who exactly he's hanging out with, etc.
I feel very left out and excluded and I'm wondering how I should feel about this. I don't have much of a social life anymore. While he has friends and fun and flirtation all around him.
I also think he might be doing drugs at work. I have voiced my feelings about it but he feels justified, that he "put's in his time with me" enough, but it's not true. We never do anything just the two of us, because of my schedule and the fact that we have children. He says we can't do anything together because it' a money issue and a time factor.
2006-08-27 01:43:22 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You've answered your own question with your question. "at work too much?" Of course he is. And you should be upset if you think marriage should be a cooperative effort with give and take. He's cheating whether he's having sex there or not.
Whether he knows it or not, he's alcoholic so you're largely talking to the booze. Google alcoholism, find a a couple of sets of the questions about "does your friend have a problem with alcohol?" and read them. Then, armed with the information, tell your husband things are going to change. Give him your conclusion about dependence on booze, offer to go to counseling with him, and give him a week or two (you decide but make the deadline firm), and tell him if at the end of that time he's made no move toward change, he needs to move out. Be kind (as you can), gentle, but firmer than the concrete in the street.
2006-08-27 02:02:39 · answer #1 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok there is a problem at home, and the reason why I say that is a man's home is supposed to be his castle. And if he spends more time at work than he does at home, he might be making his castle somewhere else. I have 3 kids and I know men can get a little closed mined about themselves, but as a wife don't forget the things you did for him before the kids. If you let your surroundings keep you from the things you love to do maybe you both should seriously sit down together or with a professional and talk things out before it's too late. Good luck!!
2006-08-27 02:03:27 · answer #2 · answered by bigblkcute 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He isn't being fair! He all got those excuses. I would be upset if my husband hangs out at work too much, but we normally contact everyday either text messages in the morning and afternoon just to keep communicating. Sometimes he had to work late but it is really work demands. Maybe your husband is just using work as an excuse to have fun and not spending time with you. Doing or sharing quality time together with the family doesn't exactly need huge amount of money at all if he really likes to. Im sorry to say that probably your husband is irresponsible when it come to spending time with you.
Sometimes men need to learn a lesson in order to change.
2006-08-27 02:12:17 · answer #3 · answered by Arianne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband works a lot but he always comes home. He wants to spent all his free time with our child. You have every right to get upset. Why doesn't he include you? You can get a babysitter. If there is not enough money for you to anything together then why just him and not you. You didn't make the children on your own. He should learn to put family first or get out. That would be one less thing to worry about.
2006-08-27 02:04:11 · answer #4 · answered by sscott12414 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no longer attempting to sound like a complicated guy, yet regarding the only time I cry is by using dying. I even tend to develop into greater pissed than disappointed over issues. i assume i'm an exceedingly stereotypical male in that regard. Did Incubus of anybody rather merely call somebody else a sociopath and a psychopath?
2016-12-11 16:08:35 · answer #5 · answered by allateef 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course i will be upset.. I will not accept the fact that my husband will neglect me and the family for his work..
There is always a time for hanging out with friends but too much is not acceptable..I think you better talk to him.. Communicate, thats the best thing you can do before things get worst..
2006-08-27 01:53:25 · answer #6 · answered by Gnet 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as you think on this listen to aretha franklin respect and a rose is still a rose. then see where that takes your thinking process. there is something to be learned from these two songs. he is on one track and you are on the other. his is the wrong road and your is the road thet you both started off on. snatch a knot in hs *** and he will either do you a favor and give you your life back or he will come back to his senses and realize what an *** hole he has been to you and start doing right. you deserve to have a life too. you didn't have the kids alone so you shouldn't be left mostly alone to raise them.
2006-08-27 02:27:58 · answer #7 · answered by dana_29646 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's having more fun at work then with you. I'd check out cheaters. I know your upset but that is what you are going to have to do. He is leading a whole different life at work.
2006-08-27 01:50:45 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is normal and happens a lot.He is not married to his job he is married to you make sure he understands that.Be firm with him that he understands how you feel.If he is not willing to make some changes tell him to stay at work don't come back home.
This should get the point across.
Good luck with this one im sure it will be better!!
2006-08-27 02:05:21 · answer #9 · answered by canuticklemepink 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not at all. I wish my husband stayed out couple of nights. Sometimes I feel I can't even breathe at home.
2006-08-27 01:55:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋