plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!I need lots of help!!!!!!!!!!!!?

Question

Dear Diary,
This is one of the happiest day in my hole life! I begged my father and mother to buy me the book "stormbreaker" like a million times, I wantted to read that books since I was born! Just kidding! I wantted to read that book about a month, in the afternoon, they finally said yes. So my father bought me to the bookstore this afternoon. First, I couldn't find the book, so I read other books like "The princess Diary" or "Harry Potter" instead. After 2 hours I had finally found the book, so I bought it home. When I arrived home, I called my best friend Debra. I told her that I bought the book "stormbreaker", she said that is her favorite book. We chat and chat, we chated so long that her mother tells her to stop. I asked her if she can come spend the night at my house today, She said yes. When she arrived she brought her boyfriend along with her, I met her boyfriend for the first time, and I think he is quiet annoying.

He talked a lot, so we two just sit there and listen to his rubbish. He like to say something like "I'm cuter than Brad Pitt" or "I think you should wear make up". But I have to admit that his is quit humors, we had a great time toghter. I am happy today, I sure hope tomorrow will be better!
I'm a Chinese and the teacher told us to write a english diary, so I'm wondering can you plzzzzzzzzzzzz help me? use your way of writing my diary or check if is there any grammar , spelling , phrase that is wrong! I can give you 10 points if u did a good job!(you can change or add many dificult or funny words in my diary, make my diary more interesting)

Answer 1

Dear Diary,

This is one of the happiest days I have every experienced in my whole life! For the past several months I have begged my parents to purchase the book "Stormbreaker" for my reading pleasure. This afternoon they took me to the bookstore and, at first, I was disappointed because I could not locate the book. So, instead I spent several hours glancing over "The Princess Diaries" and a couple Harry Potter novels.
After those several long hours of idol reading and walking about the bookstore, my wish was fulfilled when I discovered "Stormbreaker" sitting on one of the shelves. After my parents bought the book for me, I called my best friend Debra as soon as I arrived home to inform her of my new gift. She stated it was her favorite book.
Several hours had passed and our telephone conversation strayed to other unrelated interests and ended when her mother told her to "hang up the phone." Just prior to ending our verbal exchange, Debra was granted permission to come to my home for a sleepover. Unbeknownst to me, she had invited her boyfriend.
On our initial meeting, I found Debra's boyfriend to be quite annoying. He was hyperverbal and the content of his words seemed vacuous. His conversation appeared egotistical and condescending. He would say such things as, "I am cuter than Brad Pitt" and "I think you should wear make-up." However; at times, I found him rather humorous.
Well, my dear Diary, I am happy this day. I finally received the book I wanted and I wait in anticipation to read it. Also, I met Debra's boyfriend who I think is just "okay." Perhaps when I write in your pages tomorrow the events will be much more exciting.

For some reason, the indentations for the paragraphs are not showing up. Indent at the words "This," "After," "Several," "On," and "Well."

Good luck!

Answer 2

1. day - days
2. stormbreaker - Stormbreaker
3. wantted - wanted
4. read that book about a month, in the afternoon they finally said yes - read that book for about a month. This afternoon they finally said yes.
5. my father bought - my father brought
6. couldn't find the book - couldn't find Stormbreaker
7. other books like "The princess Diary" or - other books such as "The Princess Diary" and
8. 2 - two
9. had finally - finally
10. found the book, so I bought it home. - found the book, bought it, then brought it home.
11. arrived home - arrived at home
12. bought the book "sormbreaker", she said that is her favorite book. - bought the book "Stormbreaker" and she said that that is her favorite book also (or too)
13. We chat and chat. we chated so long that her mother tells us to stop. - We chatted so long on the phone that Debra's mother told her to stop.
14. I asked her if she can come spend the night at my house today, She said yes. - Then I asked Debra if she could come and spend the night at my house tonight and she said yes.
15. When she arrived she brought her boyfriend along with her, I met her boyfriend for the first time, and I think he is quiet annoying. - Later she arrived at my house and had brought her boyfriend, (put his name here), along with her. That is the first time I met (boyfriend's name here) and I think he is quite annoying.

Answer 3

OK. Your diary content is just fine. There are a few errors, including spelling and grammar.
hole life = whole life
wantted = wanted
that books = book
wantted = wanted
wanted to read that book about a month = for about a month
I would put a period after month and start a new sentence with In the afternoon
bought = brought x 3
chat = chatted
tells her to stop = told her to stop
quiet = quite
I would capitalize the book title Stormbreaker
Otherwise, well done!

Answer 4

OK,but try to avoid repeating the words in the sentence.

Answer 5

hmm there is lots of mistakes but i understood it all, well done...needless to say your english is far better than my chinese!

Answer 6

What?

Answer 7

i think its good~